[The Comedian]

So you’re not only a thief, but a liar as well.

What's your degree in?

What are you paid to do?

Was the hamster crack a little too close to home?

Frowning takes 68 muscles.
Smiling takes 6.
Pulling this trigger takes 2.
I'm lazy.

[stormer]

Oh, no. What's the matter? Things a bit lonely down in your mother's basement? For the record:

What's your degree in?

Which one? I have several.

What are you paid to do?

I am a researcher affiliated with one of the largest universities in the United States. One that has produced either as faculty or alum, 28 Nobel Prize laureates. With the exception of three in Economics and one in Peace, all have been in Physics, Chemistry, or Medicine.

Was the hamster crack a little too close to home?

I don't know. Ask your nose - it's closer to the hamster crack than anything else. And by the way, what are your qualifications?