$$$$ThE oFfIcIaL fRiDaY sIlLiNeSs ThReAd$$$$

[Mind Freed]

In the 1400’s a law was set forth in England that a man was
allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence we have “the rule of thumb”

---

Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was
ruled “Gentlemen Only..Ladies Forbidden”...and thus the word GOLF entered
into the English language.

---

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time
TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

---

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S .
Treasury.

---

Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear
better.

---

Coca-Cola was originally green.

---

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

---

The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to
work: Alaska

---

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get
this...)

---

The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

---

The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of
eleven:
$ 16,400

---

The average number of people airborne over the U.S. in any
given hour: 61,000

---

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

---

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

---

The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National
Monuments.

---

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king
from history:

Spades - King David

Hearts - Charlemagne

Clubs -Alexander, the Great

Diamonds - Julius Caesar

---

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

---

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both
front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front
leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If
the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural
causes.

---

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on
July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on
August 2, but the last signature wasn’t added until 5 years later.

---

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace

---

Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most
popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession

---

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have
to go until you would find the letter “A”?

A. One thousand

---

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield
wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

A. All were invented by women.

---

Q. What is the only food that doesn’t spoil?

A. Honey

---

Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day
of the year?

A. Father’s Day

---

In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames
by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the
bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... “goodnight, sleep tight.”

---

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that
for a month after the wedding, the bride’s father would supply his
son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and
because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey
month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

---

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts...
So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at
them “Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.”
It’s where we get the phrase “mind your P’s and Q’s”

---

Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle
baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a
refill, they used the whistle to get some service. “Wet your whistle” is the
phrase inspired by this practice.

---

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their
elbow!

Now come on... who tried to lick their elbow? I did... not possible.

[Liberty Valance]

[Salamander]

Okay...y’all chip in and buy me a snake and I’ll post a video....;-D

[”Serpentessa”?!?]...rofl!

[Salamander]

I
Do
Not
Like
Dolls

{{{{shudder}}}}

[CholeraJoe]

I'll call BS on the statue. This is the statue of Andrew Jackson in Jackson Square in New Orleans. Since both front feet of the horse are in the air, he should have died in battle, right? Wrong. Jackson died of tuberculosis at age 78.

[Pan_Yan]

You Are Pause

Compared to most people, you are reflective and thoughtful.
You're always willing to take a break and digest everything that's happened.

You are patient with life. You are happy to sit back and let things unfold.
You're not in a hurry. You're content to take things at someone else's pace.

What Remote Button Are You?

[Salamander]

She walks like she just shoplifted a frozen turkey.

[Liberty Valance]

[lilylangtree]

A Mexican, an Arab, and a redneck girl are in the same bar.

When the Mexican finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, “In Mexico, our glasses are so cheap we don’t need to drink with the same one twice.”

The Arab, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws it into the air, pulls out his AK-47, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, “In the Arab world, we have so much sand to make glasses that we don’t need to drink with the same one twice either.”

The redneck girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer, downs it in one gulp, throws the glass into the air, whips out her 45, and shoots the Mexican and the Arab. Catching her glass, setting it on the bar, and calling for a refill, she says, “In America we have so many illegal aliens that we don’t have to drink with the same ones twice.”

[red-dawg]

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello.

He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, 'Do you know me?'

To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says,'My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party
that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?'

She looks into his eyes and says calmly, 'No, I'm your son's teacher !!!'

[AppyPappy]

Your new best friend

http://www.snopes.com

[sunny48]

Yep, major fail!!!

Thank you boxerblues

[Lady Jag]

You Are Fast Forward

Compared to most people, you are impatient and antsy.
You are action oriented and love adventure. You don't care much for downtime.

You like the skip the boring stuff and get to the good stuff. You don't like interruptions.
You can't stand anything slow. You live your life in fast lane and expect others to do the same.

What Remote Button Are You?

[fredhead]

Some Naval (nautical) terms:

Scuttlebutt - naval term for a drinking fountain, also for gossip, originally the water barrel where the sailors would gather around and swap stories.

Head - the restroom. On sailing ships of days past, the official place to relieve oneself was up forward at the bow, by the figurehead. The reason for this was twofold: The wind coming from astern (propelling the ship) would blow the smell away from the ship, and the bow plowing into the waves would wash the area clean.

[Lady Jag]

[sunny48]

A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden.

Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.

He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating.

‘Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?’ she asked.

‘They’re mating,’ her father replied.

‘What do you call the spider on top?’ she asked.

‘That’s a Daddy Longlegs,’ her father answered.

‘So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?’ the little girl asked.

As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question he replied, ‘No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.’

‘The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then lifted
her foot and stomped them flat.

‘Well, we’re not having any of that gay shit in our garden’ she said.

[Tamar1973]

Funny videos....

Gizmo Flushes

RK house No PORK!! - Maple Story version

How to Shower: Men v. Women

Get a Mac feat. Mr. Bean

Thats one way to sleep

[sunny48]

Snake has to climb a tree to escape the crazy biting rabbit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTYPYKpHkDo

[Tamar1973]

You just might be a liberal if....

An Engineer's Guide to Cats

[Tamar1973]

Cuban Gynecologist: Local Car Commercial