Opinion: Concerns About FBI Raids Have Been Overblown And There's No Need To Wor---Hang On, There's A Knock At The Door

BABYLON BEE HEADQUARTERS — We here at the Babylon Bee have been deeply saddened over the past days to see such mean-spirited criticism of our favorite institution of American government, the dearly beloved Federal Bureau of Investigation.

While seeing agents storm the home of President Trump may give some cause for concern, we feel that the FBI has earned our trust. When they gave up figuring out a motive for the Vegas shooter, the FBI was honest about it. When they were too busy to help gymnasts being sexually assaulted, they were honest about it and hung up the phone. When the anniversary of January 6th came around, who was there at the Capitol to show their support? The FBI. These are patriots who deserve our trust.

In uncertain times like this, we as a country must come together in support of our bedrock institutions. We are facing unparalleled threats to our democracy. Who but the FBI will stand guard against the domestic terrorists who ask their local school board to stop segregation? How will America continue if we do not arrest those who build LEGO models of the Capitol? Now is not the time for talking about the well-documented cases of the FBI encouraging young men to commit mass shootings. No, friends. Now is the time for putting our absolute faith in the organization who so wisely protected Epstein's clients, who labored for years to prove Russian collusion before discovering the Steele dossier was a hoax, and who we are sure will finally act on the evidence of Hunter Biden's felonies any day now.

So take a deep breath, America. The furor over a measly FBI raid is beyond silly, when the agency has never once descended into partisan politics. We here at the Babylon Bee still believe tha --- wait just a minute, good reader. There's a knock on the door, we'll be right back.

So this is what Solzhenitsyn was talking about when he wrote:

And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if every Security operative, when he went out at night to make an arrest, had been uncertain whether he would return alive and had to say good-bye to his family? Or if, during periods of mass arrests, as for example in Leningrad, when they arrested a quarter of the entire city, people had not simply sat there in their lairs, paling with terror at every bang of the downstairs door and at every step on the staircase, but had understood they had nothing left to lose and had boldly set up in the downstairs hall an ambush of half a dozen people with axes, hammers, pokers, or whatever else was at hand?... The Organs would very quickly have suffered a shortage of officers and transport and, notwithstanding all of Stalin's thirst, the cursed machine would have ground to a halt! If...if...We didn't love freedom enough. And even more – we had no awareness of the real situation.... We purely and simply deserved everything that happened afterward.

Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn , The Gulag Archipelago

I can't comment on much of the article, but here is the letter I did on Director Comey. Or should that be Commie?

From: Retain Mike Sent: Tuesday, December 18, 2018 10:21 AM To: WSJ Letters (wsj.ltrs@wsj.com) Subject: Comey is a Dirty Cop

Consider the source before giving credence to Comey’s statement attacking the GOP Congress and Trump about any infraction of law. What credibility he had disappeared when he spoke about Hilary Clinton’s emails. He began by detailing the many ways in which her actions violated Sections (d), (e), (f) of the federal penal code Title 18. He then declared that no prosecutor would ever consider bringing her to trial.

Comey committed an egregious violation of his FBI Director authority by stating Clinton should not be prosecuted. An attorney general or district attorney possesses the authority to decide what if any crime should be pursued. Whether federal, state, or local, police actions are limited to investigation and arrest, as can be confirmed by reading any of their mission statements. That is why we have grand juries and judges deciding upon charges by issuing warrants.

Comey lied by saying the lack of intent to reveal national secrets through Clinton’s prohibited computer system absolved her from prosecution. The applicable statute criminalizes her gross negligence leaving no room for determination of intent. As such the law shares common ancestry with laws from traffic violations to negligent homicides.

Comey is a dirty cop and anything he says, or writes should be ignored.

Partial Bibliography:

Comey rips Trump, GOP over 'lying'

https://thehill.com/policy/national-security/421745-comey-rips-trump-gop-over-lying

Text of FBI Director Comey’s statement on Clinton emails

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/text-of-fbi-director-comeys-statement-on-clinton-emails-2016-07-05

Andrew McCarthy: ‘FBI Rewrote the Statute’ to Give Hillary Clinton a Pass

http://www.breitbart.com/2016-presidential-race/2016/07/06/andrew-mccarthy-fbi-rewrote-the-statute-to-give-hillary-clinton-a-pass/

FBI Rewrites Federal Law to Let Hillary Off the Hook

http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/437479/fbi-rewrites-federal-law-let-hillary-hook

TITLE 18—CRIMES AND CRIMINAL PROCEDURE

https://www.govinfo.gov/content/pkg/USCODE-2009-title18/pdf/USCODE-2009-title18-partI-chap37-sec793.pdf

Negligent Homicide Law and Legal Definition

https://definitions.uslegal.com/n/negligent-homicide/

Mission Statement FBI

https://www.fbi.gov/about/mission

Mission Oregon State Police

http://www.oregon.gov/osp/Pages/about_us.aspx

Mission Lane County Sheriff

https://www.lanecounty.org/government/county_departments/sheriff_s_office

Mission City of Eugene Police

https://www.eugene-or.gov/658/Mission-Vision-Values

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