"I'm running for president b/c my wife's a shopaholic, Hunter's got a new paternity
suit and my brothers put down payments on beachfront property and Lear jets."
Posted on 09/05/2020 1:33:47 AM PDT by John Semmens
In an effort to contrast himself with Trump, Democratic presidential nominee former Vice-President Joe Biden ventured into riot-torn Kenosha to show off his "healing" technique. He started out by blaming Trump for the violence tearing apart the city and other cities throughout America.
"Turn on any TV station and you'll find commentators condemning Trump for dividing this country," Biden said. "The opinion is almost unanimous that Trump is a divider and not a uniter. In virtually every city people are crying out for racial justice, but police are slaughtering black men in numbers that defy belief. Struggling to be heard, demonstrators have been forced to resort to more physical methods for registering their demand for change. But all Trump has to offer is law and order."
"The whole trouble in Kenosha started when police murdered Jacob Blake for no good reason," Biden contended. "Blake was a black man trying to visit his girl friend when he was cruelly shot in the back by a racist cop. An enraged citizenry struck a blow for racial justice by burning down the businesses near the location where Blake was shot."
"When Trump visited Kenosha a few days ago he made no effort to visit with Blake's family to apologize," Biden pointed out. "I filled that gap and had a nice conversation with his father. This is the kind of healing effort we expect from a president. Trump's refusal to do this demonstrated his unfitness for office."
The reality is that Blake had an outstanding warrant for his arrest for sexual battery when police encountered him violating a court order to keep his distance from the girl friend he had previously assaulted. He fought with the officers trying to arrest him and was shot while reaching into his car—possibly to get a weapon. The shots paralyzed him, but did not kill him. His father, Jacob Blake Sr. is a frequent poster of anti-Semitic screeds on Facebook.
Biden proffered no suggestions on how to restore peace to the streets of Kenosha other than "elect me in November so we can bring an end to the four-year nightmare that descended on this country when Trump took office." Biden said he didn't recall any anti-Semitic remarks being made by Blake Sr. during their conversation, but pointed out that "we still have free speech in this country and everyone who is not an enemy of the state is entitled to his opinions."
During the question-and-answer phase of Biden's Kenosha appearance his campaign went the extra mile by providing attendees with a list of pre-approved questions they could ask the candidate. An unappreciative black woman complained that "I'm just going to be honest, Mr. Biden, I was told to go off this paper, but I can't. You need the truth and I'm part of the truth. The people tearing up our neighborhood aren't local citizens. They're outsiders who have come into our town and destroyed businesses we need and depend on." The Kenosha Police confirmed that 58% of those arrested for the rioting, looting, and arson that destroyed the black business district were not residents of the city.
In related news, National Public Radio expressed its regrets for airing the controversial views of Vicky Osterweil. Osterweil is the author of In Defense of Looting. She contends that "looting is basically nonviolent. You're mass shoplifting. It gets people what they need for free immediately, which means that they are capable of living without having to rely on jobs or a wage. Most stores are insured; it's just hurting insurance companies on some level. It's just money. It's just property. It's not actually hurting any people." NPR apologized for not pointing out that looting doesn't make a positive contribution to society, that even with insurance the destruction and theft perpetrated by looters will result in higher business costs and higher prices for consumers.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,413447.new.html#new
ping
Biden’s getting more incoherent by the day.......his words are unintelligible.
"I'm running for president b/c my wife's a shopaholic, Hunter's got a new paternity
suit and my brothers put down payments on beachfront property and Lear jets."
His supporters may not attend rallies or political meetings, but they know how to vote en masse.
His wife Jill does love him so, so much she loves him to death.
Biden’s supporters attend firelit rallies where they pick up TVs and shoes from the all-you-can-loot buffets.
Priceless (and alleged) satire.
Thanks, John, for another fine column.
Please remove me from your pinglist. Thank You.
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