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DNC Bends Rules for Bloomberg [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 16 Feb 2020 | John Semmens

Posted on 02/14/2020 10:18:11 PM PST by John Semmens

Even though the late-entry Democratic presidential candidate, former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, doesn't meet the Party's donor criteria for participating in the debates, Democratic National Committee chairman Tom Perez has decided to waive the requirements "for now."

"I know that some will say that changing the rules at this late date is unfair to other candidates who have met all criteria and to other candidates who have been excluded for not meeting the criteria," Perez admitted. "In my defense I ask Party members to just look at the sorry field of candidates we have left. We've got a communist leading the pack, a callow small-town mayor in second place, an addlepated former vice-president, a forked-tongued Indian impersonator, and a senator nobody's ever heard of. As the head of the DNC I can't sit by and allow the Party to go down in flames if one of these weak reeds tries to go head-to-head with Trump."

"Let's face it, the 'grassroots' ploy hasn't produced a credible array of potential presidents," Perez continued. "Mayor Bloomberg has money. In politics money talks. More specifically, Bloomberg's money was crucial in helping the Party buy controlling interest in the Virginia legislature in the 2018 elections. He's said he will spend whatever it takes of his multibillion dollar fortune to defeat Trump. That sounds like a more viable strategy than limping along with tiny donations from millions of ordinary people."

According to the new debate rules, Bloomberg will be allowed to participate via pre-recorded campaign ads that will be played whenever a debate moderator calls on the candidate to respond to a question. Perez explained that "Michael told me that the amount of money he has to spend far outdistances the amount of time he is willing to spend on this campaign. He assures me that he will check in on the debates from his home in Bermuda if he is not too busy when they air."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/276867-2020-02-14-semi-news-semi-satire-february-16-2019-edition.htm


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bloomberg; democrats; elections; favoritism; money; satire

1 posted on 02/14/2020 10:18:11 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 1raider1; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; ...

ping


2 posted on 02/14/2020 10:19:28 PM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

That’s about right.


3 posted on 02/14/2020 10:21:47 PM PST by Jonty30 (What Islam and secularism have in common is that they are both death by cultsther)
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To: John Semmens

You can ask Democrats what they know about ‘Mini-Mike’ and his policy pitch....it’s enough to put on a 3x5 inch index card...double-space.

For the Bernie supporters, they will never accept Mini-Mike.


4 posted on 02/14/2020 10:54:06 PM PST by pepsionice
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To: Jonty30

Yup...like “waiving the rules”,
the “Democratic” party comes through again.


5 posted on 02/15/2020 2:24:53 AM PST by Does so (...Democrats believe in democracy when they win the election...)
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