Posted on 09/21/2019 11:33:59 AM PDT by John Semmens
In a bid to outflank his Democratic presidential rivals, entrepreneur Andrew Yang vowed to “severely curtail the consumption of meat” and “do away with privately owned and operated automobiles.”
Yang contrasted “my honesty with the deceptive presentations of the other Democrats running for president. Their implication that all it will take to battle climate doom is to tax the rich and tout this as the height of virtue won’t cut it. There isn’t enough money in the hands of rich people to pay for the kind of gut-wrenching changes in behavior that are required. Ninety-nine percent of the population is not rich. These are the people who will have to make the necessary sacrifices if we hope to save the planet.”
The candidate’s “two-pronged approach would entail measures like higher taxes and strict regulations to price meat out of the budget for ordinary consumers and outlawing private citizens from owning automobiles. The ‘impossible burger’ invented by Burger King shows how those who crave the taste of meat can be satisfied with veggie patties. The emergence of driver-less vehicles shows how an ‘Uber-type’ fleet could serve all needs for individualized travel.”
Yang tried to reassure everyone that “important travel by important persons like government officers would, of course, be accommodated by having automobiles set aside for their exclusive use. Likewise, meat, while prohibitively expensive for most, would still be available for crucial occasions like state dinners with foreign dignitaries.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
https://azconservative.org/2019/09/21/candidate-comes-out-against-meat-and-autos/
Can I have an auto made from meat?
No, but Yang may ask people to eat all the outlawed autos.
Lest all vote for people who will take everything from us
As long as it is sirloin and not pink slime!
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