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GOP Establishment Warms to Trump [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 Jan 2016 | John Semmens

Posted on 01/23/2016 9:30:36 AM PST by John Semmens

GOP presidential front runner Donald Trump boasted to rally attendees in Las Vegas' South Point Resort and Casino that "the Republican establishment is coming over to our side. They hate Ted Cruz so much that they're throwing their support to me."

While there hasn't yet been an explicit endorsement from key establishment figures, Trump maintained that "it seems pretty clear that Sen. Dole and Sen. McConnell prefer me to Cruz. They recognize that I'm the guy who can reach across the aisle and make a deal with Pelosi (D-Calif) and Reid (D-Nev). Cruz has been the guy blocking consensus between Republicans and Democrats for the last four years. He says he wants to shrink government, but that's the stance of a loser. We have the opportunity to grab the reins and use the power of government to restore order, to direct resources toward the right investments, to make America great again."

Former Sen. Bob Dole, the GOP's 1996 nominee for president, castigated Republican presidential candidate Sen. Ted Cruz as "an unlikable guy. I get the sense that he cares more about conservatism than governing. Trump, on the other hand, has the right personality to wheel-and-deal in Washington. He understands the way things get done. He won't get hung up on some obscure Constitutional principle. He will 'horse trade' and 'twist arms' the way it's always been done."

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell averred that "if the choice is between Cruz and Trump I'd have to say Trump is more likely to be in sync with how we do business in DC. He isn't out to hamstring the government like Cruz is. He will give a little to get a little. I think those who rely on funds from the government have nothing to fear from Trump."

In related news, Trump denied that the billions in loans he has received from big banks would influence him the way in which much smaller amounts lent to Cruz that Trump says amount to the banks "owning Cruz." "Cruz will be bound by the idea that he has to pay back those loans," Trump contended. "The banks know that I will not be bound in the same fashion. One way or another I will figure out how to get out from under any obligation. In contrast to every other candidate, I am free from outside influence. I will do whatever I think is necessary as president without worrying about who I owe what. It's called 'winning.' My $10 billion personal fortune shows I know how to get the better of any deal I make."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=192191.0


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: cruz; gope; satire; trump

1 posted on 01/23/2016 9:30:36 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
I get it. You just rearranged the quotes to make it "semi-satire."

You are a clever man.

2 posted on 01/23/2016 9:44:02 AM PST by Slyfox (Ted Cruz does not need the presidency - the presidency needs Ted Cruz)
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To: John Semmens

BTTT! Thanks John for lending us a piece of your prescience.


3 posted on 01/23/2016 9:46:10 AM PST by Movemout (Elect Cruz or lose. Last chance to preserve freedom.)
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To: Slyfox

Sadly, there is a lot more solid truth in what is recorded, than satire, at this point.

The Donald WOULD make just these kind of deals, participating with these people. But unlike the way the Republican leadership handles dealing with “across the aisle”, it would be the Democrat leadership who would be forced to finally stand up and cross over to the REPUBLICAN side, to conclude the deal, and not the other way around.

Oh, there will be bipartisanship, all right, REAL bipartisanship, and it would be ever so much harder, later on, for the Democrats to say they were “locked out”.


4 posted on 01/23/2016 10:01:30 AM PST by alloysteel (If I considered the consequences of my actions, I would rarely do anything.)
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To: Slyfox

5 posted on 01/23/2016 10:06:48 AM PST by Slyfox (Ted Cruz does not need the presidency - the presidency needs Ted Cruz)
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To: John Semmens

Trump is running away with it.

Time to get used to him being the nominee.


6 posted on 01/23/2016 12:07:54 PM PST by xzins (Have YOU Donated to the Freep-a-Thon? https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate/)
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