Angry Obama Vows Vengeance against Trade Bill Opponents [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 12 June 2015 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Alternating between tears and venom, a stunned President Obama ranted against members of his own Party, calling them "faithless turncoats" and alleging that "they are destroying my credibility with foreign nations," after the House of Representatives voted 302 to 126 against the Trade Adjustment Assistance Act--a provision deemed crucial to the fate of his "fast track" trade legislation.

The vote came after a rare personal appearance of President Obama to lobby for the legislation. Erstwhile political ally, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif), led Democratic opposition to the President's wishes. She remained unfazed by the President's threat "to make life really hard for those who defy me." "Even under a 'worst case' scenario, the President will only be in office for another 19 months," Pelosi pointed out. "How much damage could he do?"

Press Secretary Josh Earnest advised the President's political enemies "to not underestimate his disappointment or his determination to get his way, one way or the other. Don't forget that he still has his pen and phone. He could bypass Congress and enact the trade legislation via executive action. He could use his phone to call on the FBI and NSA to release information that could prove embarrassing to Ms. Pelosi and others."

Pelosi, however, wasn't about to back down. "It's not as if we don't have our own sources of information that might prove embarrassing to the President," she warned. "And if push comes to shove, there is always the option to impeach him. The prospect of elevating Joe Biden to the White House so the Party can run an incumbent for President in 2016 is looking better every day."

In other news, Earnest brushed off revelations that the Chinese government has been hacking into secret federal databases for more than a year, saying that "this is just more proof that this Administration is the most transparent administration that this country has ever had, bone none."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/177948-2015-06-12-semi-news-semi-satire-june-14-2015-edition.htm

[John Semmens]

ping

[Blood of Tyrants]

Pelosi is already saying that her support can be bought for a new highway spending bill. The Rats still control the House and Senate.

[spokeshave]

Many a true word spoken in jest.

[fatnotlazy]

On the rare occasions, Obama hasn't gotten his way, he has unleashed his vengeance on all of us. The king doesn't take kindly to rejection. Look for the revenge to be so terrible, all of the spineless wimps in congress will be begging for c a do-over.

Thanks again for the ping, John.

[rlmorel]

Heh, I thought for sure it might be one of those Hitler video things...I do enjoy your work...:)

[Sir Napsalot]

Obama Declares Victory After House Fails Key Trade Vote

Not satire !!!

[doorgunner69]

Pelosi, however, wasn't about to back down. "It's not as if we don't have our own sources of information that might prove embarrassing to the President," she warned. "And if push comes to shove, there is always the option to impeach him. The prospect of elevating Joe Biden to the White House so the Party can run an incumbent for President in 2016 is looking better every day."

Be still my heart, do not think I could stand that much hilarity and schadenfreude.

Good Lord, what a ride that would be!

[Focault's Pendulum]

Thanks for the ping!

[Viking2002]

Evening, John.

[Chode]

He could use his phone to call on the FBI and NSA to release information that could prove embarrassing to Ms. Pelosi and others.

the phone is mightier than the pen

[TChad]

"Even under a 'worst case' scenario, the President will only be in office for another 19 months..."

That's rough.

[COBOL2Java]

Earnest brushed off revelations that the Chinese government has been hacking into secret federal databases for more than a year, saying that "this is just more proof that this Administration is the most transparent administration that this country has ever had, bone none."

I think you mean "bar none", but still...

[NonValueAdded]

Vengeance is mine, sayeth the ‘roid.

[Seaplaner]

In other news, Earnest brushed off revelations that the Chinese government has been hacking into secret federal databases for more than a year, saying that "this is just more proof that this Administration is the most transparent administration that this country has ever had, bone none."

Clever sentence this, John; however...ahem...

there might have bone a teensy typeau.

Another fine column of truth disguised as satire.