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Bipartisan Plea for Lynch Confirmation [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 18 April 2015 | John Semmens

Posted on 04/18/2015 9:14:03 AM PDT by John Semmens

President Obama's nominee for Attorney General, Loretta Lynch, received a vote of support from both media star Al Sharpton and former Florida Governor Jeb Bush this week. Her confirmation has been held up by Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ken) in protest over Obama's executive grant of amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants.

Sharpton labeled McConnell's actions "racist. Keeping a Black woman from rising up to take her rightful place is a continuation of the hundreds of years of oppression of African Americans in this country. They let a white woman hold this job when Bill Clinton was president. For them not to extend the same courtesy to a Black woman is just shameful."

Bush took a more nuanced stance saying that "while I doubt that the Republican opposition to Ms. Lynch can be totally attributed to racism, it could be construed as such by the media. Rather than having this monkey on my or any Republican's back as the GOP strives to win the 2016 presidential election, it would be much more convenient if Lynch were simply approved as AG."

"Besides, as a matter of principle, I believe that it's the President's prerogative to have anyone he chooses to serve in his cabinet," Bush added. "I certainly would expect such deference to me if I were president. If you ask me, to violate this basic courtesy on the rather flimsy grounds that President Obama may have exceeded his authority on the amnesty thing isn't the way we should be running this country. Do we really want to set a precedent of denying a president the option of bypassing Congress when circumstances warrant it? Would we want such a rigid adherence to the Constitution if a Republican was in the Oval Office?"

To help press home their seriousness on the issue Sharpton and Bush vowed to do more than just offer words of support for Lynch. Sharpton announced a partial hunger strike and swore off sushi until Lynch is confirmed. In contrast, Bush says he "will eat nothing but Mexican food, which I will cook myself—unlike a certain other public figure who has to get hers from Chipotle. I will prove that I am the authentic Hispanic presidential candidate in the 2016 race and simultaneously express my solidarity with the plight of the immigrant."

In related news, Lynch rebuffed the idea that the Department of Justice ought to investigate former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's emails. "As I understand it, all of these emails were sent from or received on Secretary Clinton's private server," Lynch observed. "Well, the Fourth Amendment to the Constitution bars government from intruding into private communications. As far as I am concerned this case is closed."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/174709-2015-04-18-semi-news-semi-satire-april-19-2015-edition.htm


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bush; lynch; satire; sharpton

1 posted on 04/18/2015 9:14:03 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens; All

If the Establishment Republicans confirm this treasonous wretch, it is 100% proof that the Republican leadership has become our enemy.


2 posted on 04/18/2015 9:40:46 AM PDT by stephenjohnbanker (My Batting Average( 1,000) (GOPe is that easy to read))
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