How much should they charge this mellow dude?
Posted on 09/29/2014 1:19:54 PM PDT by John Semmens
Hungry for a means to supplement is budget, the US Forrest Service is proposing new regulations that would allow it to charge visitors $1500 if they want to take pictures in wilderness areas.
Liz Close, the Forest Service’s acting wilderness director, called the new fees “essential to our mission. These wilderness areas belong to the government. Why shouldn’t we get revenue from what is our property?”
Close warned against thinking that “these areas are too vast for us to enforce collection. We are watching from both the ground and the air. Rangers randomly patrol with orders to seize any cameras used by persons who cannot show that they have paid the fee. Airborne drones can cover extensive acreage and help guide ground forces to intercept illicit photographers throughout our territory.”
For now, drone launched missiles are not part of the plan, but could be deployed in the future if needed. “It has already been established that the President has the authority to order the use of deadly force against American citizens without having to go through cumbersome judicial channels,” Close pointed out. “So, if more restrained methods prove inadequate we can always up the ante.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2014/09/27/school-board-to-add-masturbation-to-kindergarten-curriculum/
How much would it cost to paint an image of those trees?
I take it you meant to spell “forest,” wrong?
How much should they charge this mellow dude?
So this commie: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woody_Guthrie
Lied in this song: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/This_Land_Is_Your_Land
TO ALL OF US!
Surprise Surprise....
You cannot take pictures of the “King’s Property”....
Just a Happy Little Five Grand fee.
Meanwhile at the Ranger station Rick hasn’t checked in.
I thought I saw this article last week. If I recall, the regulation says the fees are retroactive. Any old photographs or images of trees that are still living today are subject to the fee. I think a request was put into the NSA to search for possible violations on any type of media, including cell phones.
See y’all later - got a few trees to remove.
The $1500 was a little over the top. You would have had me at $50.00.
Yes, but what they didn’t tell you is that it’s $1000 if your just looking - so that’s a lot better. If you want the cheapest option, they issue free blindfolds for the drivers at the entry of all of these Fed. lands if you are just passing through. They have stated it is far safer for the environment than cameras and human eyes, you know, actually looking at things ;- )
Liz Close, the Forest Service’s acting wilderness director, called the new fees “essential to our mission. These wilderness areas belong to the government. Why shouldn’t we get revenue from what is our property?”
What is wrong with the second sentence?
Nothing’s wrong, because this is satire!
Maybe Mods can start charging for community requested satire...
;-)
“Life is like a box of chocolates”.
How much $$$ to hug a tree?
I always look for the “Semi-News” label before commenting. Their satire sails so razor close to reality.
This reminds me of the Looney Tunes cartoon “Boobs in the Woods.” Porky Pig is painting a nature scene when Daffy Duck comes running up with a rag in his hand and erases the painting. “That’s my lake! I don’t want my lake painted!”
John - I thought this semi-satire was semi-hilarious; although not likely soon, don’t dismiss the creativity of government to come up with ways to squeeze blood out of stone.
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