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DUmmie FUnnies 06-25-13 (DUmmie Suffers Smart Phone Culture Shock)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | June 25, 2013 | Dummies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 06/25/2013 6:35:40 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Some DUmmies have discovered Smart Phones and they are puzzled by the technology as you can see in this THREAD, "I finally got a smart phone." Guess what? Your humble correspondent also got a smart phone a couple of months ago. An LG Motion. So why did I wait so long? The main reason is that I wanted a cell phone with HD quality video and since the LG Motion has excellent 1080 HD video, I went for it. You can see for yourself the quality from this VIDEO recorded recently on my LG Motion. It features my niece and nephew, Genesis and James Jones. BTW, I will soon be featuring them in their own online video show. It won't be your typical children's show since it will also be of great interest to adults as well. For example, one show will change the way you eat breakfast. No kidding. Okay, enough of PJ "home movies" and back to the DUmmies... The amazing thing here is that just 10 years ago, crude phone cameras represented the cutting edge of cell phones. We take it for granted now, but smart phones have radically changed much of our life styles. If you doubt me, think back to the time in the not too distance past when, if you wanted to make a call on the road, you had to use a pay phone that could well have been covered in the lice of a drug dealer. So let us now watch the DUmmies enter the Smart Phone world in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thinking that Genesis and James Jones might soon be auditioning for the Food Network now that they have an opening, is in the [brackets]:

I finally got a smart phone

[Me too, DUmmie Omaha Steve but would it be too much trouble for you to tell us what TYPE of smart phone you have?]

After years of bragging about I only want a phone that makes calls. Not even texts. While at a meeting Wednesday night I watched as people were looking up info during a heated discussion. So I got a smart phone with wi-fi. Just turning it on was a challenge. Culture shock.

[Yeah, pushing that ON button is such a great technological challenge. Now on to the other shocked DUmmies...]

You'll pry my iPhone out of my cold dead hands. Easy to read/comment/post on DU too.

[Thank you for using your iPhone for providing us with lots of DUmmie comedy material.]

Quick access to information on the 'net is essential for my job. The map/GPS app also helped me out greatly more than once. Love my smartphone.

[I use the map/GPS app in my couponing. I used it just yesterday to figure out the quickest way to travel from one store to another. BTW, when I told my mother a few weeks ago that I got an Android phone she told me she didn't want to hear about any kinky stuff so I told her I was just kidding because what I got was really a smart phone...but it also an Android.]

Smartphone Rule #1 don't text a photo of your peepee to anyone unless you also are prepared for it to be on the internet for all to see

[Is that you, Anthony Weiner?]

... and if you do, make sure its not a little Weiner

[Little Anthony & The Imperials.]

I don't want to buy a 'smart' phone, because I'd be afraid I'd turn out to be to dumb to figure out how to use it.

[Now you know why you are a DUmmie.]

My first smartphone was a Windows one, big mistake, but I still have and use it. The one I got over a year ago has Android, and I really like it. I do pack both of them around on belt holsters like some sort of ubergeek.

[Good luck hitting on any Playboy Playmate in that outfit.]

Really, it'll change your life. You will be able to find out anything you need, practically anywhere you are. That's a game changer. I'd have to say that the easily portable Internet-connected device will have as much effect on society as the printing press, if not more.

[Gee. And all this time I thought it was Super Ginsu knives that had the biggest effect on society.]

I don't think they're called 'smart phones' anymore. They're called 'phones'.

[So instead of calling you a DUmmie, I'll just call you DUmb.]

A tablet would've been better for you to research quickly, I think. Or a pc. But a phone is one-stop researching, I guess...phone and researching, together. They're very expensive, both the initial cost & the monthly.

[Yeah, the 50 bucks to buy an LG Motion plus the $50 monthly charge is enough to bust the typical DUmmie budget.]

I don't go to mtgs where research is necessary, so I'll still with my prepaid Tracfone. I spend $200 a year, my minutes roll forward, and I use the same cell towers that the smart phone users do.

[Congrats! By stubbornly sticking with a Tracfone, you will continue to remain in your low paying job. You saved about $400 per year in order to keep a job that pays you at least $4000 less than what you make using a smart phone. DUmmie budgeting at its most laughable.]

We have a new lap top with wi-fi. The meeting was where there was no wi-fi. It doesn't have cell capability that I know of. Our granddaughters tablet has 20-30 mins of battery. Not an option either.

[Um...Did you ever hear of 4G? That is what you use for data when you don't have Wi-Fi access.]

I got one last November. I still can't figure out how to do much with it.

[Getting past using the ON switch is such a technological chore.]

I can't figure out how to get the pics of the phone without emailing them, one slow email at a time.

[Should I tell this DUmmie about enabling AUTOMATIC PhotoBucket uploads?]

I can't figure out how to turn off the internet to save my minimal time without turning the whole phone off.

[Almost as tough as inhaling and exhaling.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; smartphones
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One big thing I use my new Smart Phone for is listening to radio stations from around the country. iHeartRadio.Com.
1 posted on 06/25/2013 6:35:40 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


2 posted on 06/25/2013 6:37:17 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware YRip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

I use TuneIn Radio pro. I can press pause for up to 30 minutes and record songs/programs I like.

Just FYI.

Thanks for the post!


3 posted on 06/25/2013 6:40:14 AM PDT by BBB333 (Q: Which is grammatically correct? Joe Biden IS or Joe Biden ARE an idiot?)
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To: PJ-Comix
My first smartphone was a Windows one, big mistake, but I still have and use it. The one I got over a year ago has Android, and I really like it. I do pack both of them around on belt holsters like some sort of ubergeek.

At last - something I can agree with one of the DUmmies (the windows phone being a mistake, not the liking to wear them on my belt like a geek).

4 posted on 06/25/2013 6:42:43 AM PDT by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: PJ-Comix

I miss your more weekly posts. They are one of my only bright spots on the Internet as of late...


5 posted on 06/25/2013 6:57:27 AM PDT by republicanbred (...and when I die I'll be republican dead.)
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To: PJ-Comix

They better watch out for the Phone Cops.


6 posted on 06/25/2013 6:58:32 AM PDT by dfwgator
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To: PJ-Comix
I finally got a smart phone

This DUmmie could buy 100 smart phones, but would still be a DUmmie.

7 posted on 06/25/2013 7:03:57 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (The Second Amendment is NOT about the right to hunt. It IS a right to shoot tyrants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

8 posted on 06/25/2013 7:05:48 AM PDT by listenhillary (Courts, law enforcement, roads and national defense should be the extent of government)
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To: PJ-Comix

Don’t DUmmies have to be smarter than their phone in order to use it?!

Top 10!


9 posted on 06/25/2013 7:08:52 AM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: rockrr

The new Windows Phones are awesome!

http://www.windowsphone.com


10 posted on 06/25/2013 7:09:57 AM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: Incorrigible

Mine is a Lumina 822 - company issued. I don’t care for the functionality compared to my crackberry but I am getting used to it (slowly).

I will say that the camera is superior to any other phone-equipped camera I’ve used - especially video.


11 posted on 06/25/2013 7:16:37 AM PDT by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: rockrr

I still prefer a keyboard myself. Apple’s design paradigm ruined that for everyone!

I have the HTC 8x but my wife has the Lumia 822. I got her a gel cover for it and it feels great to my hand. The HTC is too narrow for me.

What I like about the Lumia 822 is the ability to change the battery and add a MicroSD card so all her music is not competing with the phone apps for the same memory.


12 posted on 06/25/2013 7:20:38 AM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Look at all these DUmmies...supporting eeeeevil corporations! Don’t they know Apple makes billions of dollars by paying people in China pennies on the dollar?

I THOUGHT THE LIBERALS CARED ABOUT THE PEOPLE????

/s


13 posted on 06/25/2013 7:20:56 AM PDT by Personal Responsibility (Government: Slimy used car salesmen writing laws forcing you to buy their cars)
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To: Personal Responsibility
Look at all these DUmmies...supporting eeeeevil corporations!

“And the corporations sit there in their... in their corporation buildings, and, see, they’re all corporation-y...and they make money!”

14 posted on 06/25/2013 7:22:40 AM PDT by dfwgator
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To: republicanbred

Will try to up the frequency. BTW, one bit of good news is that the Spam filter is now really working well. Almost no spam on the blog is getting thru. They try, oh how they try, but almost all of it gets automatically filtered out and I get rid of the rest.


15 posted on 06/25/2013 7:34:03 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware YRip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

What a struggle it must be to deal with a device whose IQ is a sizable number of points above your own. Life’s ahrd for DUmmies.


16 posted on 06/25/2013 7:39:21 AM PDT by Noumenon (What would Michael Collins do?)
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To: PJ-Comix
Quick access to information on the 'net is essential for my job. The map/GPS app also helped me out greatly more than once. Love my smartphone.

Pizza delivery guy?

17 posted on 06/25/2013 7:41:22 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (Osama tried and failed. Obama got it done.)
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To: BBB333

I also like being able to watch YouTube on my phone. When I was waiting on a line to renew my car registration in May, I passed the time watching YouTube videos so the time just flew by.


18 posted on 06/25/2013 7:51:51 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Beware YRip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

What does it say that I moved the call icon to a scrolling screen on my i4 and the text icon to the fixed screen?


19 posted on 06/25/2013 9:02:07 AM PDT by E Rocc (November 2, 2010: The beginning of the end of the kleptocracy.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Mine is turned off most of the time, and it's stupid anyway, a Nokia 1600 I paid $19.95 for.

When it's on I mostly get calls from people with strange accents trying to sell cut rate Viagra. Being on the do not call list doesn't slow them down a bit.

If I need to dial 911 I'll turn it on.

20 posted on 06/25/2013 9:34:39 AM PDT by SWAMPSNIPER (The Second Amendment, a Matter of Fact, Not a Matter of Opinion)
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