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DUmmie FUnnies 02-21-05 ("Clueless about women, please help me out")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | February 21, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 02/21/2005 5:09:39 PM PST by PJ-Comix

I’ve always figured that most DUmmies were socially awkward rejects and this DUmmie THREAD titled, “Clueless about women, please help me out,” only confirms that view. What is truly frightening is that the way DUmmie steve2470 describes himself, it sounds like he is well over 30 years old. UNBELIEVABLE! This isn’t even some gawky 15 year old kid. It is a DUmmie in his 30s who still hasn’t got a clue how to act around women because he just went on his FIRST DATE. Just this description alone is making me laugh. So let us read on about the Socially Awkward DUmmie and the dating advice he received. As usual the socially maladjusted DUmmie comments are in Bolshevik Red and the commentary of your humble correspondent, thinking that DUmmie steve2470 would make an HILARIOUS guest on Jerry Springer, is in the [brackets]:

hi ladies,
I had a first date Friday night with a very beautiful and nice lady who I have known off and on for 15 years. I thought we had a very nice time. We went to a very chic restaurant in my town that is somewhat romantic and had a nice dinner. The conversation and dinner went on for about 3 hours. I left it up to her to let me know when she had to leave, since I was flexible. At about 10:15 PM, she said she needed to get home to her babysitter for her 4 and 5 year old sons. The babysitter was a first time person, a rookie with her kids.

[Get a clue, DUmmie steve2470. This woman is giving you the BRUSHOFF. Most likely she just wanted a freebie meal and since you are so socially awkward she gave you a mercy date. And speaking of rookies, did you ever….uh, never mind.]

When I escorted her out to the valet parking area, we chatted for a few minutes until her car came up. She then hugged me (with no prompting from me) and told me she would kiss me except she had a cold sore on her mouth. As she was walking to her car, I told her that I would call her and she said "I'd like that" or words to that effect. Bear in mind, this lady is pretty assertive and perfectly capable of telling me politely that this was the last date and that we could be friends.
I think I have a second date coming. Am I way off base ?

[ABSOLUTELY! Since you are a rookie with women I need to inform you that this story shows all the classic signs that you got shot down. Oh, and she found you so repugnant that she made up that cold sore story so you would feel happy about not catching herpes.]

sounds to me like you do unless she is into playing mind games.

[Believe me. She was playing mind games. She had to. This woman was probably too polite to tell DUmmie steve2470 that he absolutely REVOLTED her. Hey, when you are in your 30s and haven’t had a date yet, you KNOW there HAS to be something WRONG with this dude.]

call her!! How many days has it been (not that it matters)? But seriously, just call and ask her out again! We women HATE waiting...

[So why don’t YOU call Dummie steve 2470 and go out with him? Yeah, he will revolt you too but since you are both revolting DUmmies the mutual revulsion could cancel each other out.]

I called her tonight and left a very nice message...

[“Need sex NOW!!! PUHLEEEEAASE!!!”]

I didn't want to appear overeager, so I didn't call yesterday. She has to call me back now.

[Keep waiting. She is bound to call you by the end of the third decade of this century.]

I hope she calls back- it sounds like you had a fun time!

[I think the date began to go downhill the moment DUmmie steve 2470 asked his date if foreplay comes before or after sex.]

thank you so much....you folks are wonderful....I just can't stand not knowing LOL Oh well, life goes on..

[If life goes on, then you might consider removing your face from the outside of your ex-date’s bedroom window.]

You didn't ask for that second date via the machine did you?

[Maybe their answering machines could date each other.]

nooooooooooo............Just reiterated that I had a great time...and just asked her to call me back, that was it.

[I can almost sympathize with DUmmie steve2470, only in my case I am waiting for Jeff Kleinman of the Graybill and English Literacy Agency to call me up. Good luck DUmmie steve2470 but I think I’ll hear from Jeff Kleinman LONG before you ever get a callback from your ex-date.]

Today made 48 hours. 24 seemed too fast to me

[Give it another 48 million hours.]

Sounds like a good sign to me.

[Some woman gets out of kissing DUmmie steve2470 by giving him a bogus story about a cold sore and then doesn’t return his phone call. Yeah, a great sign. I once had a woman flat out slam a door in my face and I consider even that to be a more hopeful sign.]

I think you are in store for a 2nd date. Do you have any ideas on what to do for a 2nd date? Did she give you any clues as to what she likes to do?

[DUmmie steve2470 wants to hold a vigil in the snow outside John Kerry’s townhouse. His ex-date just want to avoid him.]

art museums and parks are good places. Places to walk and talk...plus if you get hungry or want coffee, you can easily modify plans.

[True story: I went out with a woman that drank way too much in a very annoying way (polite way of saying sloppy drunk). So I called my friend, Pete Demeo, who NEVER drinks and told him I had a hot date for him, RIGHT NOW. He came over and took the drunken woman off my hands. Next day I asked Pete what happened. He disgustedly told me that she asked him to buy her a case of beer. Then they went late at night near an airport where she climbed up a tree and Pete had to spend the entire night handing beer cans up to her as she tossed down one empty beer can after another. I won’t tell you what she also tossed down in liquid form to spare you the gruesome details. Oh, sorry for the brief digression… Let us now return to the romantic neophyte, Dummie steve2470.]

good ideas ! I will consider those and sound her out

[And keep in mind about modifying your plans so get a list of all the cheap motels in the area. However, with your track record, I think you will do no better than shacking up with a blowup doll.]

looks to me like you get a second date!!!

[I BELIEVE!!! And John Kerry WILL be inaugurated on Jan. 20.]

thanks Barb ! I'll censor it to be PG-13 LOL no, I'm sure it will be PG-13 because I really really like her and am not at all into the sexual thing at this moment.

[Let me guess. Paris Hilton is NOT currently in your Little Black Book.]

anyone who spends their precious time on me deserves a good summary, and that includes you

[Do what most guys do who DON’T score on their dates---LIE LIKE HELL.]

just keep a twinkle in your eye and keep feeling good about yourself ( and then just remember, DETAILS, lots of 'em)

[This advice from DUmmie barb162. Meanwhile the few guys who are deluded into dating her describe their dates thusly: “BAAAAAARRRFFFFF!!!”]

thanks ! Details no problem, I'm just trying not to be insecure or intimidated by her beauty. She is.... well...you know. She must like me because she can have her pick of men.

[SHEESH! You have just gone on your first date where you got shot down and already you are acting like Mr. Lothario about giving us the dirty details of your second date which WON’T be happening.]

well yes, she must. She wouldn't have spent that long with you if she didn't like you; she would have found a way to cut it short. I know what you mean about people who are really physically attractive...it is hard not to just keep staring at them

[Do you have some problem with your reading skills? Didn’t you read what DUmmie steve2470 wrote about his first date? She DID cut it short with that phony story about the cold sore. However, I know what you mean about very physically attractive chicks like Petra Verkaik. I would have a hard time to keep from staring at “them.”]

yeah I really had to watch my eyes on the date LOL I was nervous enough as it was. You folks are wonderful for this feedback. I've been thinking about her all weekend and a bit worried, as well.

[Congratulations on successfully averting your eyes. However, you might want to try working on not constantly grabbing your Pocket Rocket while out on a date.]

give her another call soon whether she calls you back or not. Things happen with a mom of young kids, like kids erase messages all the time.

[Or the mother erasing the memory of the date from her mind.]

yes good idea. I'm pretty sure she will call back soon, probably tomorrow some time. I went out on a limb and gave her my office phone number as well. So, we'll see. The only thing that made me really unsure about the date is that we got into the spirituality discussion. She is a bit more "Christian" than I am, but there were no arguments or harsh words or anything. I reassured her that she was ok with me.

[Seeing as how you are a worshipper of Satan, even an agnostic would be a bit more “Christian” than you. Don’t worry, however, it isn’t religious differences keeping you apart. It’s more like a matter that you haven’t bathed since Election Day.]

You'll be fine....she'll probably try to convert you

[I once considered going out with a Jehovah’s Witness chick but somehow being cursed out in the early weekend AM while knocking on strangers' doors’ isn’t exactly my idea of a fun date.]

LOL well....maybe. I was pretty clear, in a pleasant way, about who I am. I think she's too smart to try the conversion thing. Hell, at this point, I'm just worried about the 2nd date LOL We have so much in common. We'd be a great couple, as long as religion, etc. didn't get in the way.

[If you can get over your body odor problem I can see marriage on the horizon.]

Have a great second date!

[May it be as disastrous as the first date!]

thank you so much, she is (at this point) the woman of my dreams: very intelligent, well educated, nice, good morals, in my profession, a Farrah Fawcett look a like....I could ramble on..

[Farrah Fawcett looks pre or post Ryan O’Neal?]

this gives me hope. I haven't had a second date for over 8 years.

[Maybe because you haven’t had a first date for over 12 years.]

Alright, I'm a guy and quite clueless about women myself, but I have to say: if I had a date that went as well as the one you had sounds like it went I don't think I'd be feeling uncertainty at all!

[If I had a dating experience like the one DUmmie steve2470 had, I would definitely consider saying, “Goodbye, cruel world!”]

thanks ! I have this tendency to think women are just being nice to me because they don't want to hurt my feelings... Maybe I need to lose that tendency.

[At the same time you acquire at least minimal social skills. Oh yeah, and don’t forget to try bathing.]

I think that you might have a second date. I am a single mother. You get worried about your kids, even when you are enjoying yourself. Besides, if she didn't enjoy herself she would have pulled the "I have to use the restroom" stunt. Go to the restroom, message your standby girlfriend, go back to the table. In five minutes she calls you, pretends to be the babysitter, and says the kids are sick. She didn't do that. I think that you are safe.

[Instead she used the old “I have a cold sore on my lip” stunt.]

call her! sounds like you have a second date.

[Yeah. She hasn’t replied to DUmmie Steve 2470’s phone message so that MUST be grounds for optimism.]

CALL HER.... And arrange that second date. She wants you to be the Man, and to treat her as though you're interested... then BE interested. Us women who are always in control, running the show, doing it ALL sometimes want a man to be a man, and to take control, to take charge, to set the time, make the arrangements. We like trusting a man enough to do that.

[Break her door down and DEMAND that second date. Show her that even though you are clueless about women that you are taking control! Oh, and you might consider having a Reality Show hidden camera taping all this. It could be the comedy hit of the TV season.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: du; dummiefunnies; dummies
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
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To: PJ-Comix
I didn't want to appear overeager, so I didn't call yesterday. She has to call me back now.

{*crickets chirping*}

tick - tock - tick - tock

{*more crickets chirping*}

calendar pages fall to ground . . .

141 posted on 02/21/2005 7:52:07 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The Waiting Game.)
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To: feinswinesuksass

yep - that is exactly what I figured too. He called her a THIRD time. Freak! I feel for her. After 28 minutes - he gets "maybe" another date - righhhhhhhhhhhtttt... She wanted him off the phone. period.


142 posted on 02/21/2005 7:53:13 PM PST by commonguymd (My impatience is far more advanced than any known technology.)
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To: beckysueb

That would be what I would be doing if I had an overgrown kid living at home....but then I would have kicked his bu** out a looooong time ago! I definitely believe in kids being out of the house by the time they go off to college--and stay gone, except for visits. Fortunately, our son is very independent and also feels that way!


143 posted on 02/21/2005 7:53:51 PM PST by luvie ("THE ROAD OF PROVIDENCE IS UNEVEN AND UNPREDICTABLE-YET WE KNOW...IT LEADS TO FREEDOM!"GWB 2-2-05)
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To: feinswinesuksass
steve2470 (1000+ posts) Mon Feb-21-05 10:48 PM Response to Original message 60. she might be going to Yanni Friday night with her mom. Hmmm... I almost asked myself along lol

LMAO - this has got to be a joke.
144 posted on 02/21/2005 7:57:09 PM PST by commonguymd (My impatience is far more advanced than any known technology.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Whoa, dude. As much as I was laughing, that's sad. I've been shot down, but I always knew it. "I have to leave early, I can't kiss you cause I've got a cold sore on my lip?" "I haven't had a second date in EIGHT YEARS?"

Oh well, at least if he reproduces, all we'll have running around is a bunch of little hands.

145 posted on 02/21/2005 7:58:34 PM PST by Richard Kimball (It was a joke. You know, humor. Like the funny kind. Only different.)
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To: PJ-Comix
She wouldn't have spent that long with you if she didn't like you; she would have found a way to cut it short.

Yeah, those menstrual cramps didn't come until, what, a good 10, 15 minutes into the date.

146 posted on 02/21/2005 7:59:14 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Migraine, your loss.)
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To: Richard Kimball

It was a different DUmmy who had not had a second date in 8 years....


147 posted on 02/21/2005 7:59:57 PM PST by Feiny ( I own many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.)
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To: feinswinesuksass

"she might be going to Yanni Friday night with her mom. Hmmm..."

She'd date her mom before she would him again.

BWAAAAHAHAHAHAAA!

This is sad.


148 posted on 02/21/2005 8:00:32 PM PST by kenth (I love the smell of burning troll in the morning.)
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To: commonguymd

Yanni....I thought he was dead.

This has got to be a prank....a pretty funny one too.


149 posted on 02/21/2005 8:00:43 PM PST by Feiny ( I own many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.)
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To: PJ-Comix
She is a bit more "Christian" than I am, but there were no arguments or harsh words or anything.

Look, give it up. The Flying Nun is not coming back.

150 posted on 02/21/2005 8:03:30 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Maybe she's taken a vow of silence.)
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To: kenth
Well, we now know Steve lives in or near Orlando, Florida.


151 posted on 02/21/2005 8:04:38 PM PST by Feiny ( I own many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.)
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To: PJ-Comix
You'll be fine....she'll probably try to convert you

She'll give you a "Chick" tract: "Dear steve2470, buzz off."

152 posted on 02/21/2005 8:08:11 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The Four Spiritual Laws: 1) No. 2) Fuggedabout it. 3) No way, Jose. 4) Re-read the first three.)
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To: PJ-Comix
We'd be a great couple, as long as religion, etc. didn't get in the way.

Yeah, just like, oh, the most important stuff in life. Other than that. . . .

153 posted on 02/21/2005 8:11:52 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (I'd be a major league ballplayer, as long as my age and lack of talent didn't get in the way.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Egad! She looks like Farrah Fawcett? Poor girl! As for him, he must spend his spare time watching Brady Bunch and Charlies Angels reruns - no wonder he's socially retarded!


154 posted on 02/21/2005 8:20:54 PM PST by derllak
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To: speed_addiction

Faye DUmaway! There's the girl for steve! A match made in . . . somewhere.


155 posted on 02/21/2005 8:21:13 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (DU-harmony.com)
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To: franksolich

I GOT IT! I GOT IT!

IT LINKS! IT LINKS!

IT FINALLY LINKS!

THANK YOU, GOD!

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02-17 in which DUmmies accuse George Bush of being a bicycle, er, bisexual
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02-17 in which DUmmies wish to “screw” Republicans
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02-16 in which DUmmies discuss “life-changing” voter fraud
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02-15 in which DUmmies try to recruit the “sleaziest, slimiest” politician
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02-14 in which DUmmies are suicidally crazy
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02-11 in which DUmmies are tired of living like this
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02-11 in which DUmmies deny Warped Churchill is wrong
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02-09 in which DUmmies dream of Gore-Clark in 2008
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02-08 in which DUmmies whine about salt being rubbed into their wounds
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02-08 in which Susan Saradon explains the rustics and city people
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02-07 in which DUmmies are appalled by the nationalism in the Super Bowl
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02-04 in which DUmmies are outraged at being labeled “extremists
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02-03 in which DUmmies are outraged by the State of the Union speech
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02-02 in which DUmmies defend Warped Churchill
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1334129/posts
02-01 in which DUmmies conspire to crash the economy
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02-01 in which DUmmies whine about the success in the Iraqi elections
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01-30 in which DUmmies slam the success in the Iraqi elections
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01-28 in which DUmmies promote Gored for president, Ho Chi Dean for chairman
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01-27 in which Katrina Sumner asks the DUmmies for money
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01-26 in which DUmmie Skinner whines about DUmmies whining
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01-25 in which DUmmies worry about being monitored by their big brother
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01-24 in which DUmmies ask if capitalism is good or bad
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01-23 in which DUmmies discuss the musical talents of Doug from Upland
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01-22 in which DUmmies discuss the iron rules of Hollywood movies
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01-21 in which DUmmies fret that Captain Pike was an idiot
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01-21 in which DUmmies heard the Free Republican on NPR
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01-20 in which DUmmies protest that protesters were sprayed
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01-19 in which DUmmies fantasize about the Inauguration
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01-18 in which DUmmies slam Barack Obama
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01-18 in which DUmmies betray their real ages by remembering the ‘60s
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01-17 in which DUmmies admit animosity towards Bush voters
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1322405/posts
01-16 in which DUmmies deal with inauguration week
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1322087/posts
01-15 in which the Hopi Elders speak to the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1321599/posts
01-14 in which Tipper assures DUmmies she wants Al to run in 2008
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1321084/posts
01-14 in which DUmmies are going to hurt real bad in a week
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01-13 in which DUmmies allege Bush is behind al-Qaeda
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1319879/posts
01-12 in which DUmmies worry that Err America ratings are slipping
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01-11 in which Chris Heinz-Kerry speaks to the DUmmies
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01-11 in which DUmmies plan for Inauguration Day
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01-10 in which DUmmies complain about CBS firing four people
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01-10 in which DUmmies refuse to concede “stolen” election
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01-08 in which DUmmies don’t care any more
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01-07 in which DUmmie “Doohickie” stops believing
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01-06 in which DUmmies are depressed
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01-06 in which John Kerry betrays the DUmmies
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01-05 in which Frank Lautenberg threatens to arrest the DUmmie “Andy Stephenson”
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01-05 in which the boryborygmous DUmmie “William Pitt” bloviates
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01-04 in which DUmmies believe
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01-03 in which DUmmies spread myths about the tsunami
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01-02 in which the DUmmie “Walt Starr” reminds DUmmies Bush will be sworn in
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01-01 in which DUmmies are believers
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12-30 in which DUmmies handle things on a personal level
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12-29 in which DUmmies ask the Dalai Lama to overturn the election
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12-29 in which the DUmmie “William Pitt” pied-pipers the DUmmies
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12-28 in which DUmmies forget about John Kerry
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12-28 in which DUmmies discuss the “DUmmie FUnnies”
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1309507/posts
12-27 in which the heavy sadness of the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1308991/posts
12-26 in which DUmmies are elated that John Kerry is going to unconcede, #2
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1308785/posts
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12-24 in which DUmmies watch us watching DUmmies
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12-23 in which DUmmies emulate Charlie Brown
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12-22 in which DUmmies confess they are not angry enough
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1307004/posts
12-22 in which DUmmies discuss Bev Harris, Woman of the Year
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1306543/posts
12-21 in which DUmmies will be in Washington on January 6
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1305768/posts
12-20 in which DUmmies whine nothing is going their way
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12-20 in which DUmmies promise they won’t give up
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12-18 in which DUmmies have an apoplexic fit about Bush being Man of the Year
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12-17 in which Bev Harris shows the DUmmies the money
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1303910/posts
12-17 in which DUmmies tell Free Republicans to read
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1303484/posts
12-16 in which DUmmies believe John Kerry will be inaugurated January 20
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1303120/posts
12-16 in which DUmmies refuse to spare John Kerry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1302652/posts
12-15 in which DUmmies ruminate about Bev Harris
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1302301/posts
12-15 in which Randi Roadkill cat-fights Bev Harris
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1301953/posts
12-14 in which DUmmies form a posse to arrest Ken Blackwell
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1301568/posts
12-13 in which DUmmies look for a missing bombshell
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1300703/posts
12-13 in which DUmmies wonder about John Kerry letter to Ohio electors [sic]
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1300336/posts
12-11 in which watching DUmmies watching us watching DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1299493/posts
12-10 in which DUmmies plead Alphonse Capote Gore to go to Ohio
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1298485/posts
12-09 in which DUmmies call Larry King
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1298141/posts
12-09 in which DUmmies are blood-boiling angry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1297690/posts
12-08 in which DUmmies wonder what’s up with Karl Rove
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1297407/posts
12-08 in which DUmmies call for new methods
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1296877/posts
12-06 in which DUmmies threaten to have an orgasm
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1295584/posts
12-05 in which DUmmies wonder if John Kerry will become president
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1295089/posts
12-04 in which DUmmies give their best shot at winning in 2008
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1294551/posts
12-03 in which Bev Harris is banned from DUmmieland
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1294059/posts
12-03 in which DUmmies engage in an uncivil war
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1293514/posts
12-02 in which Keith Olbermann fists it out with Bev Harris
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1293221/posts
12-01 in which DUmmies are coping
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1292424/posts
12-01 in which DUmmies threaten to become Gummies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1291878/posts
11-30 in which DUmmies guarantee they are going to win
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1291619/posts
11-30 in which Michael Moore disappoints the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1291054/posts
11-29 in which DUmmies await the Revolution
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1290281/posts
11-28 in which DUmmies celebrate Jesse Jackson going to Ohio
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1290066/posts
11-28 in which a Turk compares the United States and Adolph Hitler
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1289716/posts
11-27 in which a solitary DUmmie admits John Kerry actually lost
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1289255/posts
11-25 in which no Thanksgiving for DUmmies this year
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1288254/posts
11-24 in which DUmmies order John Kerry to contest election
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1288063/posts
11-24 in which DUmmies wonder what is going on with Bev Harris
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1287521/posts
11-23 in which DUmmies use graphic language
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1287096/posts
11-23 in which DUmmies conspire on theories, or theorize on conspiracies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1286625/posts
11-22 in which DUmmies are dejected over Ohio vote counts
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1286212/posts
11-22 in which DUmmies urinate into the prevailing advection
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1285873/posts
11-21 in which Bev Harris threatens to sue DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1285583/posts
11-20 in which Dummies confidently predict the Great Flood
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1284928/posts
11-19 in which DUmmies uncover massive fraud
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1284267/posts
11-19 in which DUmmies seek to learn from Cuba
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1283742/posts
11-18 in which DUmmies believe John Kerry will be inaugurated January 20
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1283445/posts
11-17 in which the Election Conspiracy Butterfly Net Brigade
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1282552/posts
11-17 in which DUmmies are upset about John Kerry having $45 million left over
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1281900/posts
11-16 in which DUmmies expect a tidal wave of retiring Democratic politicians
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1281459/posts
11-16 in which DUmmies are sure a recount in Ohio is a sure thing
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1281094/posts
11-15 in which DUmmies think Ohio will flip-flop for John Kerry (main link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1280726/posts
11-15 in which DUmmies think Ohio will flip-flop for John Kerry (subsidiary link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1280720/posts
11-15 in which disheartened DUmmies want to leave the country
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1280249/posts
11-14 in which DUmmies blow hot air about how to win elections
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1279934/posts
11-13 in which the DUmmie “Skinner” threatens trouble for P.J.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1279329/posts
11-12 in which DUmmies slam Hilarity Clinton
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1278679/posts
11-12 in which DUmmies don’t like werenotsorry.com
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1278268/posts
11-11 in which DUmmies speculate about RFK Jr. on the ticket in 2008
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1277730/posts
11-10 in which DUmmies hardly knew John Kerry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1276275/posts
11-09 in which DUmmies wax ecstatic over the revelations of Randi Roadkill
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1275699/posts
11-08 in which DUmmies are having a really hard time coping
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1274855/posts
11-08 in which Terry McAuliffe seeks the feedback of the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1274183/posts
11-07 in which appears the Ghost of DUmmie gloats past
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1273922/posts
11-06 in which DUmmies laid in the corner drooling and making weird sounds
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1273060/posts
11-05 in which DUmmies try to not hate those who fear God
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1272201/posts
11-04 in which DUmmies don’t give a fudge
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1271083/posts
11-04 in which DUmmies wasted four years in DUmmieland
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1270114/posts
11-03 in which DUmmies swear vengeance
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1269566/posts
11-03 in which the anger, angst, and anguish of the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1268895/posts
11-03 in which DUmmies claim election day was worse than 9-11
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1268508/posts
11-03 in which DUmmies recriminate John Kerry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1268384/posts
11-02 in which DUmmies are about ready to cry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1267636/posts
11-02 in which depressed DUmmies can’t watch television any more
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1267433/posts
11-02 in which the excresence is disappointed out of the DUmmies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1266417/posts
11-01 in which P.J. announces all the special editions of the DUmmie FUnnies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1265613/posts
11-01 in which DUmmies knock out an idea for John Kerry
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1264757/posts
10-31 in which DUmmies on Halloween wonder if Kerry will lose
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1264194/posts
10-30 in which DUmmies forbid God to let them lose
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1263117/posts
10-29 in which sorority girlfriend betrays DUmmie “WideEyedLiberal” (main link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1262067/posts
10-29 in which sorority girlfriend betrays DUmmie “WideEyedLiberal” (subsidiary link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1262062/posts
10-28 in which DUmmies throw wild balls at Curt Schilling
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1260570/posts
10-26 in which the DUmmie “Shortbus” threatens to leave America
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1258057/posts
10-25 in which DUmmies hate George Bush even more after 9-11
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1256928/posts
10-22 in which a DUmmie discovers his mother-in-law likes George Bush
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1253246/posts
10-20 in which DUmmies sputter over John Edwards primping his hair
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1251343/posts
10-19 in which DUmmies expose the Protocols of the Elders of Lieberman (main link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1250524/posts
10-19 in which DUmmies expose the Protocols of the Elders of Lieberman (subsidiary link)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1250519/posts
10-15 in which DUmmies plan for revolutionary justice if John Kerry is elected
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1246013/posts
10-14 in which DUmmies desperately vote in post-debate on-line polls
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1245474/posts
10-14 in which DUmmies theorize about George Bush’s bulge
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1244756/posts
10-13 in which DUmmies question George Bush being given questions beforehand
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1244458/posts
10-12 in which DUmmies flame Free Republic
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1242462/posts
10-11 in which DUmmies want to transcendentally meditate George Bush out
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1242156/posts
10-11 in which DUmmies threaten to deface proposed Ronald Reagan $10 bill
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1241454/posts
10-10 in which DUmmies conspire about George Bush’s bulge
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1241119/posts
10-09 in which DUmmies wonder if George Bush will use nuclear weapons to win
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1240287/posts
10-08 in which DUmmies plan what to do, if George Bush wins again
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1238945/posts
10-07 in which DUmmies claim George Bush, and not Osama bin-Laden, did 9-11
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1238282/posts
10-06 in which DUmmies prefer John Edwards over Richard Cheney
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1237445/posts
10-04 in which a DUmmie mourns his daughter going over to the dark side
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1235140/posts
10-04 in which DUmmies hate Ralph Nader
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1234628/posts
10-02 in which DUmmies put tolerance into action
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1233603/posts
09-29 in which DUmmies dismember America
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1231055/posts
09-29 in which DUmmies connect George Bush with oil
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1230162/posts
09-28 in which DUmmies yearn for Ho Chi, er, Howard, Dean
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1229873/posts
09-27 in which DUmmies primally scream
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1228750/posts
09-26 in which DUmmies get paranoid about George Bush winning
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1227865/posts
09-26 in which DUmmies get paranoid about mental health
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1227483/posts
09-25 in which DUmmies solve the mystery of the CBS memos
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1226968/posts
09-24 in which DUmmies discover the earpiecegate scandal
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1226392/posts
09-24 in which DUmmies have a fear of flying
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1225659/posts
09-23 in which DUmmies accuse Bill Burkett of being a Rovian plant
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1225183/posts
09-23 in which DUmmies obsess over the Texas Air National Guard papers
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1224516/posts
09-22 in which DUmmies accuse Roger Stone of forging the CBS memos
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1224175/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and memogate
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222251/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Gary Killian family
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222251/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Dan Rather’s darkest day
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222232/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and CBS scandal
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222267/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and CBS apology
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222249/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Dan Rather’s memos
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222241/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread’ DUmmies and hijinks at CBS News
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222213/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Karl Rove
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222158/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies suspicious of Dan Rather
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222123/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and double standard
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222243/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies look into CBS memos
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222250/posts
09-21 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies think of Karl Rove
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1222195/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and memogate
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221794/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and CBS caving in
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221781/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and irrefutable evidence
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221763/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and unimpeachable sources
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221742/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and credibility of CBS
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221650/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Dan Rather’s apology
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221689/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and CBS’s mistake
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221752/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and duped Dan Rather
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221712/posts
09-20 [embedded in another thread] DUmmies and Dan Rather’s buried bodies
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1221625/posts



156 posted on 02/21/2005 8:22:18 PM PST by franksolich (look for the "made in Norway" label on the can of fish)
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To: PJ-Comix
steve, maybe Bev Harris is free.

(Well, maybe not "free". . . .)

157 posted on 02/21/2005 8:24:30 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (BEV, Inc.)
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To: franksolich

nice job


158 posted on 02/21/2005 8:29:29 PM PST by feefee
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To: cripplecreek
When I escorted her out to the valet parking area, we chatted for a few minutes until her car came up.

What, steve didn't even pick her up for their date? Did he take the bus there or something?

159 posted on 02/21/2005 8:29:41 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Public transportation is a DUmmie value.)
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To: franksolich

Holy cow! That was one ambitious post! Thanks for aaalll the links. I have wanted to see some of the old DUmmie FUnnies, too.


160 posted on 02/21/2005 8:30:46 PM PST by luvie ("THE ROAD OF PROVIDENCE IS UNEVEN AND UNPREDICTABLE-YET WE KNOW...IT LEADS TO FREEDOM!"GWB 2-2-05)
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