Posted on 01/02/2016 7:55:14 AM PST by reaganaut1
My sister has been dating her boyfriend for two years. They live together and seem mostly happy. And I am happy for them, except for one thing: I am about 99 percent sure he is gay. Now, I have no problem with homosexuality, but you can understand my concern. Also, I am not the only one who thinks this. Several male friends have told me that he has tried to kiss other men or grab their crotches. I would like to bring this up with my sister. How should I do it?
Michelle, New York
Request denied! Before you say anything hurtful to your sister, let's take a peek at some of the (homophobic-adjacent) assumptions that you've made on your (probably well-intentioned) road to judgment. Your 99 percent certainty rests on unknown evidence. (Spare me your gaydar.) But I am willing to bet that much of it involves silly stereotypes about masculinity. Is the boyfriend effeminate? Does he follow fashion or musical theater? News flash: He can still be straight.
More problematic is the "gay panic" of your male friends, whose gossipy stories may rely on secondhand reports from still other men. Not so reliable. What's more, I don't buy it. Gay men and lesbians have long been, and often still are, a persecuted minority. (Have you seen the excellent film "Carol" yet?) The idea that a gay man could blithely and repeatedly "grab the crotches" of his straight cohorts is absurd. There would be consequences.
But even if all these allegations are true, who are we to substitute our judgment for your sister's? You say she is happy with this man after living with him for two years, plenty of time to decide for herself whether she is. Every relationship is different; some are more sexual than others.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
I would not treat them as dead, but I would not invite their partner to our home the way I would invite spouses from real marriages.
If he was a homosexual and she was countenancing it.
Looking at your pic of the Hillary logo, I now realize there’s more to it than merely pointing to the nearest hospital.
The arrow is the classical symbol for the male gender and it’s pointing right at “Hillary”! Also, the “H” with the superimposed arrow strikes me as a new-age gender symbol for homosexuality.
Hillary’s logo has always struck me as slightly creepy; now I know why.
He’s not a homo, he just blows men for fun and drugs.
What a perfect choice of photo! Lol!
I get it now. The logo is saying “Hillary has a penis and belongs in the hospital.” ;)
If the NYT says not to do it, you should do it.
L
I like your comment, I wasn’t sure normal was allowed as a category of humanity.
You have been reported. (sarcasm intended)
I believe the “letter” is fake and that the Times “writes” these letters themselves so that they can “answer” them and “start a dialogue” as libs do this all the time. This is how they get busybodies to shove this kind of stuff in their friends’ faces and say “SEE! The New York Times says...”
Then again, if someone takes anything the Times says seriously they are already a lost cause.
Not to ruin anyone’s Saturday but homosexual behavior is one of many, many sins (such as hate) that, if not repented from, will still earn a one way ticket to hell.
If he keeps trying to kiss or grab the crotches of straight men, sis will probably need a new roomie suddenly.
You shouldn’t say anything to your sister. You should haul this crotch-grabbing fairy into an alley and advise him to leave your sister alone or face the consequences. If you just happen to step on his face while you’re at it, maybe it would drive home the point.
Seriously, I wonder, myself, where and how to draw the line, vs. how far to go to show the durability of simple decent ties, without letting sexual disorder ease in as the "new normal". This is why I ask you.
I could let a son and fiance visit our home but not stay overnight in the guest bedroom. That would be reserved for married couples.
BI guy?
Happy New Year, reaganaut1! Tagline for you.
There it is.
Nothing wrong with treating gay relatives as if they’re dead particularly when they are the ones removing themselves from the family and spewing hate at the family long before they’ve come out of the closet or anyone is the wiser. Strange how “gays” are the most angry people around. They don’t know whether to hate themselves or others more.
Tagline for you.
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