Mystery pooper targeting holes of Norwegian golf course

UPI ^ | 25 July 2015 | Ben Hooper

[Theoria]

The groundskeeper of a Norwegian golf course said a mystery pooper targeting course holes must be a man "because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."

Kenneth Tennfjord, groundskeeper at the Stavanger Golf Club, said he has been finding human feces and toilet paper in course holes since 2005.

"He has a couple of favorite holes," Tennfjord told the Rogaland Avis newspaper. "And we know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."

"He poos only on weekdays. On weekends I have never found poo on the golf course," Tennfjord said.
He said the fecal discoveries are usually accompanied by used toilet paper.

Steinar Floisvik, managing director of the club, said the mystery pooper used to arrive via bicycle.

"In the early morning dew we observed bicycle tracks on the course. Footsteps showed that he had done his business, and the bicycle tracks disappeared back the way they came," Floisvik said.

Frode Jormeland, another groundskeeper, said the club installed high-powered spotlights to discourage the defecation, but the poop-etrator disabled them.

"He climbed up a tree next to the lights and wriggled far out on a branch and dismantled the spotlights. How he managed the feat without electrocuting himself or falling is a riddle," he said.

Floisvik said the pooper's motives are unknown.

"Our idea is that it could be someone who, for unknown reasons, hates the game of golf. Alternatively, the person may have a fetish or suffer from mental problems," he said.

[Old Sarge]

"And we know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."

Obviously he hasn't cleaned many women's bathrooms...

[lormand]

Blame it on men?

What about that Kardashian skank with an @$$ twice the size of mine? What about Oprah?

[dfwgator]

[dfwgator]

Paging Carl Spackler....Line 1....

[MrEdd]

Still, if there is no graffiti drawn in poo or menstrual blood then it doesn’t fit in with typical women’s room shenanigans.

Probably a guy.

[CGASMIA68]

Stalking a few of these here as we speak..Whats that flashing dot in the background of your clip?

[TexasCajun]

Occupooper ?

[right way right]

When I was a kid I use to steal live in game golf balls by bicycle.
Hey you kid!!!!

[dfwgator]

[Responsibility2nd]

"And we know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."

Yeah. Right.

 

 

"Easy there honey. Just wait 10 more seconds and the restroom is on the right."

[beaversmom]

[woweeitsme]

Sure that’s not a Baby Ruth?

[MrB]

Judge: [reading the charges] Sergeant Highway. Drunk and disorderly, assault on an officer, urinating on a police vehicle?
Highway: Well, it seemed like the thing to do, sir.

[Lynn]

This article brought tears of laughter!!! Is this satire?

[dfwgator]

[shibumi]

"Steinar Floisvik, managing director of the club, said the mystery pooper used to arrive via bicycle."

[Don Corleone]

The groundskeeper of a Norwegian golf course said a mystery pooper targeting course holes must be a man "because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."

That's sexist!

[Yo-Yo]

Sure it has to be a man?

[envisio]

Thats the sun glaring off Bill Murray’s sniper scope.