Being familiar with this EXACT type of individual from a multi-decade long first hand observable family experience, I am surprised that no one has yet pointed out the GLARING OMISSION in this article:
THE PHYSICAL VIOLENCE.
The type of individual described above ALWAYS incorporates physical violence into the above described pattern of behavior.
The victims rarely talk about it because men are ashamed to admit being the victims of it. But it is important to discuss, because physical violence is an important aspect of the controling behavior.
The men who get sucked into this kind of a relationship usually had a mother who exhibited a similar pattern of behavior towards them or their father.
Hence, once the violence starts - and the woman sees that the man will do nothing about it (other than saying he is sorry and begging for a chance to make things better), she knows she can employ violence without any consequence, and then things only get more violent.
Keep in mind, the woman in this type of relationship has an “Ace up her sleeve” - she KNOWS that if the man defends himself, even just by restraining her when she explodes into violence - HE WILL BE THE ONE THAT GETS ARRESTED when the cops come.
So she knows that, (unless she uses some weapon and commits serious injury), she can hit him with impugnity.
And given the relative size difference, she is not likely to cause him such serious injury with only her fists - if some injury is visible on his face, the guy will be loathe to admit to anyone what really happened, because of the embarassment factor.
However, the psychological toll on a man caught in this type of relationship is devastating - ultimately it is a complete loss of his sense of confidence,identity, even personhood. In extreme cases, the wife will suggest to the man who is caught in this web that he should “do everyone a favor and kill yourself”. And some undoubtedly do.
And no one ever talks about it - because of the PC culture we live in. The men victimized by these types of psychotic women have no “support groups”, and they are not likely to be believed. What they are living through is the worst hell on earth you can imagine.
Hence a huge reason to study empty-hands martial arts: by understanding hand-to-hand combat & techniques (blocks and locks), the “violence” can be gently & firmly removed from the scenario, with clarification that it _can_ be horribly escalated if need be.