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A Look at the Consequences of a Republican Win In November (Funny Vanity)
Email from a buddy | March 31, 2016 | Funny Guy

Posted on 03/31/2016 1:12:24 PM PDT by free_life

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal American immigration. The Republican presidential primary campaign is prompting an exodus among left leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray and live according to the U.S. Constitution and not Executive Orders.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, global warming activists and green energy proponents crossing their fields at night."I went out to milk the cows the other day and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose farm borders North Dakota. "The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free range chicken. When I told him I didn't have any, he angrily left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal American aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them nonetheless. He then installed 5,000 Watt loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the border, but they just keep on coming.

Canadian officials are particularly concerned about American smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, promising them that they will be delivered to safe haven in Canada. They pack them into electric cars and drive them across the border where they are simply left to fend for themselves after the batteries die. "A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though, and some kale chips, but they wouldn't share."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly fearing retribution from conservatives, who will make them work instead of providing entitlements. Rumors have been circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and study the Constitution.

In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the 1950s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on the Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age," the official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic broccoli shortage, buying up all the hip hop CDs, and renting all of the Michael Moore movies. "I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't absorb and support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many inept art and history majors does one country need?


TOPICS: Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS:
Got this in an email from a friend today, thought I would share it with all you...LOL
1 posted on 03/31/2016 1:12:24 PM PDT by free_life
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To: free_life

Looks like we’ll have to build a wall, too.


2 posted on 03/31/2016 1:14:53 PM PDT by Lower Deck
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To: free_life

Looks like the 20 some million law-breakers that
walked in, - will have to walk out.


3 posted on 03/31/2016 1:18:12 PM PDT by EnglishOnly (Fight all out to win OR get out now.)
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To: free_life
One of my favorite authors is Matthew Hughes. He has his own little story about a Republican win. I don't know if he is a conservative he seems to be.
4 posted on 03/31/2016 1:26:55 PM PDT by Nateman (If liberals are not screaming you are doing it wrong!)
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To: free_life

It is good, but they should require any caught in Manitoba, Saskatchewan, or Alberta be shipped to Ottawa or Vancouver for deportation. We have no charging stations for their electric cars. They just won’t survive if dumped back into Northern flyover country, and the train tramps and other transients won’t be getting weird ideas...


5 posted on 03/31/2016 1:38:38 PM PDT by Smokin' Joe (How often God must weep at humans' folly. Stand fast. God knows what He is doing.)
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To: free_life
Election outcome 2016:

Trump wins>riots in streets>riots along border>riots in England>incomes go up>military pay, morale, benefits and career prospects go up> world war 3 with Russia is put on hold.

Cruz wins>riots in streets>no riots along border due to legalese amnesty talk>incomes stay flat due to continuation of agenda 21 regulatory hell>military pay, morale, benefits and career prospects are talked up> world war 3 with Russia is still on the table for near future as the jury is out on apostate america.

Bernie Sanders wins> universal amnesty> income taxes go up and incomes go way down> socialist utopia/nightmare confuses minorities>military pay, benefits and careers stay dismal> New World Order bankroles socialist america for two years orders elimination of automobile production and private home ownership> world war 3 with Russia countdown begins when america takes on eastern ukraine.

Hillary wins> universal amnesty> riots from gun confiscation> national guard activated> military pay, careers, benefits are decimated> taxes go up, incomes go down save for the chosen few crony capitalists>Russia declares 30 day warning for nuclear solution.

Trump is the best outcome. Cruz is a paper tiger and Bernie has always been a confused old man. Hillary is just evil.

6 posted on 03/31/2016 1:44:29 PM PDT by x_plus_one
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To: free_life

IF TRUMP WINS, ALL WORTHWHILE PEOPLE WILL LEAVE THE US!!


7 posted on 03/31/2016 1:53:47 PM PDT by ChinaGotTheGoodsOnClinton (Go Egypt on 0bama)
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To: free_life

Another reason to vote Trump.


8 posted on 03/31/2016 2:05:12 PM PDT by onedoug
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