Posted on 10/03/2015 2:27:03 PM PDT by PROCON
There exists in this world a condiment below all others. It has all of the flavor of sawdust and the sublime texture of soap scum. Until recently, I was unaware that The Federalist, lovers of freedom, etc., was complicit in its spread. I rise today to defend Americanay, the worldagainst such scurrilous anti-food propaganda.
As all Americans, especially Texans, know, mayonnaise is a tool of oppression used by communists and bland-food lovers everywhere. It is a form of mind control designed to cow you into a sense of complacency about life. Food has flavor, and mayo covers that flavor up. It destroys your ability to taste.
What do you do to a food if it is too intense, and youre not Texan? You add mayonnaise. In much the same way that salt is used to flavor food, mayonnaise is used to bland it. It is flavors anti-particle: it annihilates on contact.
Hello, People: The French Invented Mayonnaise
(Excerpt) Read more at thefederalist.com ...
How many Little Debbie’s does it take to make a big Debbie?
Answer: Not as many as you might think.
Try cream cheese instead of mayo on your BLT.
Try cream cheese on your Roast Beef — heat it a little bit. Yum...
or mustard or many varieties. I love Mustard.
Mayo is disgusting.
The answer? Aïoli. From which the insipid whip in a jar we call “mayo” was derived. A decent aïoli will meld two garlic cloves, a large egg yolk, two teaspoons of fresh lemon juice and half a teaspoon of Dijon mustard with a quarter cup of extra-virgin olive oil and a coupla tablespoons of vegetable oil SLOWLY drizzled into your spinning food processor or blender. Prepared properly, this concoction elevates even the B in a BLT to the peaks of a sublime composition.
I think more folks than just you and I are going for the light-hearted topics today.
Forgot one!
Horseradish - Definitely a Condiment
Yom
A friend of my dad’s literally puts ketchup on EVERYTHING possible he eats. Has for decades.
Here to help us understand mayonnaise.
Like most folks, I presume you like to know what's in the foods you buy.
Standards-of-identity assure that, when you buy a jar of mayonnaise, it's mayonnaise. A reasonable function of government under the interstate commerce clause, I should think.
Yep.
I don’t have any Chicago loaded, though.
I tried some Annie Chung’s wasabe seaweed for the first time, pretty good.
Over 300 replies already. Why do threads like this get so active?
I think over the years I’ve ‘borrowed’ most every song they’ve recorded :-)
I think simply because they're not about death and destruction or about people who believe they're someone else, IMHO.
They're FUN!
My Mother was a Great Cook as well. We’re Italian, but she also made some mainstream Dishes like Breaded Liver and Onions that everyone raved over. Between the Liver and my Dad’s favorite side dish Beets (YUCK!), I never ate much Dinner on Thursday nights as a Child.
The upside was, the Dog enjoyed really the Organ Meat I fed him every Thursday night until he died.
After that, I had to resort to dropping it down the Heater Vent on the Floor. I made a point to eat in front of the TV in the Den, not to watch the Shows, but to use the convenient In Floor Liver Disposal System. IFLDS for short.
Ever seen fossilized Beef Liver? The HVAC guy did when he installed the new Heating and Ventalation System in my Parent’s House. I was about 25 years old when my Mother called me and asked me how it got there. She loved telling that story to anyone who would listen.
I assume that she also thought our Dog died because he overdosed on Beef Liver.
We have another Family joke. My Wife and my Brother’s Wife got my Mother’s Recipe for her Spaghetti Sauce. No matter how hard they try, it just didn’t, and still doesn’t taste quite the same as when my Mother made it.
We think we figured it out though. My Mother was a Smoker and we figured out the missing Secret Ingredient was Ash.
When I saw the Episode of Everybody Loves Raymond when Raymond’s Mother gave his Wife one of her Recipes that was missing one key Ingredient, my Wife and I cracked up.
It is a nice break, I agree.
I worked on clearing out the basement while the rain comes down. Nowhere to go, too broke to go there.
Besides it got me out of the house proper so I didn’t have to listen to the sports wacko imam during some college ball game my wife pays attention to.
I had plenty of music stored on the phone of stuff I like. 707 is some good working music to me.
We need to, occasionally...
Everybody eats.
Mayo is disgusting slime. Like sour cream, yogurt, Miracle Whip, cottage cheese.
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