Posted on 10/03/2015 2:27:03 PM PDT by PROCON
There exists in this world a condiment below all others. It has all of the flavor of sawdust and the sublime texture of soap scum. Until recently, I was unaware that The Federalist, lovers of freedom, etc., was complicit in its spread. I rise today to defend America—nay, the world—against such scurrilous anti-food propaganda.
As all Americans, especially Texans, know, mayonnaise is a tool of oppression used by communists and bland-food lovers everywhere. It is a form of mind control designed to cow you into a sense of complacency about life. Food has flavor, and mayo covers that flavor up. It destroys your ability to taste.
What do you do to a food if it is too intense, and you’re not Texan? You add mayonnaise. In much the same way that salt is used to flavor food, mayonnaise is used to bland it. It is flavor’s anti-particle: it annihilates on contact.
Hello, People: The French Invented Mayonnaise
(Excerpt) Read more at thefederalist.com ...
Now that’s awful fancy ... and looks pretty tasty too!
I may have to stop typing and fix food real soon.
I used to think that mayo on a burger instead of mustard
sounded like a horrible idea. Boy was I ever wrong!
Neanderthals didn’t have mayo, if you get my drift. ;-)
They do have ketchup in Europe - it's just not commonly seen in restaurants. I remember seeing some in a French version of a convenience store. It was a German brand, available in mild or spicy. It's still an adjustment, though - they just don't use some of what we do. And they're probably better off with sugar cubes and whole milk, rather than aspartame and non-dairy coffee creamer.
“Kraft Miracle Whip, some sort of vile tasting Demonic concoction from the depths of Hell.”
LOL!
Couldn’t have said it better meself!
Exactly...
My Wife’s Family puts Ketchup on Hot Dogs. Heck, they put Ketchup on everything. Her Brother ruined our Niece, she does the exact same thing.
I agree with Harry Callahan, “Nobody, I mean NOBODY puts Ketchup on a Hot Dog.
As far as Hot Dogs go, Mustard, a little Mayo and Relish for me, but I’m a Native New Yorker and that’s how we used to do it.
Nom nom nom....Bon apetit, indeed! Be right over ;-)
I love mayo on burgers. :)
At my high school, the lunch ladies used to mix mayonnaise (Kraft "Heavy Duty" mayo, to be precise) 1:1 with yellow mustard. There were pump dispensers for ketchup, mayo, mustard and the mayo/mustard mix.
Don't know if that launches the thread off on a tangent about whether such mixing is proper, just thought I'd mention it and see what happens. :-)
Ohhh, you’re killin’ me. I’m bailing to the kitchen now!
No fryer here but potato slices, lightly coated with olive oil (maybe I’ll try coconut oil) under the broiler.
Might dip them in mayo.
Taters and mayo, that’s two major food groups.
Good grief .. haven’t you people tried the Mayonnaise made with Olive Oil ..???
Best Foods makes it .. and it is really wonderful.
It sounds wonderful. :)
Both mayonnaise and salad dressing (i.e., Miracle Whip) have a standard-of-identity
To be called mayonnnaise, the product must have no less than 65% vegetable oil by weight, while salad dressing must have no less than 30% vegetable oil by weight. Starch makes up the weight difference in salad dressing.
Both also must contain vinegar (min 2 1/2% by weight for mayo) and egg yolk solids (min. 4% by weight for salad dressing).
Ahhhh, the good ole federal government...
Here to help us understand mayonnaise.
The only problem with this, is I cant find mayonnaise in my copy of the constitution; on it, maybe.. but not in it.
Federal government, here to help us understand what is mayonnaise, and what isn’t. Whether allowed legally by the constitution or not, it all about the children.
Federal government says you cannot call Miracle Whip mayonnaise, it is “for the children.”
A condiment is something you put on food that does not require refrigeration either before or after use. Ketchup, Mustard, BBQ sauce, and hot pepper sauces don’t require refrigeration.
The use of mayo as an ingredient is barely tolerable in the salads I mentioned, and strictly as a binder to hold the other parts together. It has no other purpose.
You DJ-ing tonight?
Would you be willing to share it?
We don’t use a lot of mayo but good mayo makes all the difference in the world when we do.
The best thing on roast beef sandwiches is horseradish.
Beef on weck.
The nectar of the gods.
CFR - Code of Federal Regulations Title 21
The information on this page is current as of April 1 2015.
[Code of Federal Regulations]
[Title 21, Volume 2]
[Revised as of April 1, 2015]
[CITE: 21CFR169]
TITLE 21—FOOD AND DRUGS
CHAPTER I—FOOD AND DRUG ADMINISTRATION
DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND HUMAN SERVICES
SUBCHAPTER B—FOOD FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION
PART 169 FOOD DRESSINGS AND FLAVORINGS
Sec. 169.140 Mayonnaise.
(a) Description. Mayonnaise is the emulsified semisolid food prepared from vegetable oil(s), one or both of the acidifying ingredients specified in paragraph (b) of this section, and one or more of the egg yolk-containing ingredients specified in paragraph (c) of this section. One or more of the ingredients specified in paragraph (d) of this section may also be used. The vegetable oil(s) used may contain an optional crystallization inhibitor as specified in paragraph (d)(7) of this section. All the ingredients from which the food is fabricated shall be safe and suitable. Mayonnaise contains not less than 65 percent by weight of vegetable oil. Mayonnaise may be mixed and packed in an atmosphere in which air is replaced in whole or in part by carbon dioxide or nitrogen.
(b) Acidifying ingredients. (1) Any vinegar or any vinegar diluted with water to an acidity, calculated as acetic acid, of not less than 2 1/2 percent by weight, or any such vinegar or diluted vinegar mixed with an optional acidifying ingredient as specified in paragraph (d)(6) of this section. For the purpose of this paragraph, any blend of two or more vinegars is considered to be a vinegar.
(2) Lemon juice and/or lime juice in any appropriate form, which may be diluted with water to an acidity, calculated as citric acid, of not less than 2 1/2 percent by weight.
(c) Egg yolk-containing ingredients. Liquid egg yolks, frozen egg yolks, dried egg yolks, liquid whole eggs, frozen whole eggs, dried whole eggs, or any one or more of the foregoing ingredients listed in this paragraph with liquid egg white or frozen egg white.
(d) Other optional ingredients. The following optional ingredients may also be used:
(1) Salt.
(2) Nutritive carbohydrate sweeteners.
(3) Any spice (except saffron or turmeric) or natural flavoring, provided it does not impart to the mayonnaise a color simulating the color imparted by egg yolk.
(4) Monosodium glutamate.
(5) Sequestrant(s), including but not limited to calcium disodium EDTA (calcium disodium ethylenediamine- tetraacetate) and/or disodium EDTA (disodium ethylenediaminetetraacetate), may be used to preserve color and/or flavor.
(6) Citric and/or malic acid in an amount not greater than 25 percent of the weight of the acids of the vinegar or diluted vinegar, calculated as acetic acid.
(7) Crystallization inhibitors, including but not limited to oxystearin, lecithin, or polyglycerol esters of fatty acids.
(e) Nomenclature. The name of the food is “Mayonnaise”.
(f) Label declaration. Each of the ingredients used in the food shall be declared on the label as required by the applicable sections of parts 101 and 130 of this chapter.
[42 FR 14481, Mar. 15, 1977, as amended at 57 FR 34246, Aug. 4, 1992; 58 FR 2886, Jan. 6, 1993]
Industrial mayo!
I never used anything in those pump dispensers at school so I don't know what our lunch ladies were mixing up. Mustard and mayo are indispensable (see how I worked that flagrant contradiction in there?) ingredients in a potato salad (the kind I like best anyway) so it's not a crazy idea.
Salt and vinegar on the fries.
Mayo works great on BLT’s.
I predicted 200, now it’s 300... 8~)
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