Posted on 02/21/2003 8:18:01 AM PST by Jakarta ex-pat
Well, it's been more than a few years since I had that "little talk" with my Dad. Somehow, I feel Dad's sensible approach of discussing sex with his son, in an upfront and sometimes graphic manner, has gone out of style.
"Son, I don't want you to ever push a girl into something she doesn't want to do, nor do I want you to push yourself into something you're not ready for. I think that teen sex is a mistake, but it's not a mistake I want you to die over, or ruin your life over. This is a box of condoms. (Followed by detailed instructions on how to use them). If the box gets empty, come to me and I'll get some more for you. You can tell me anything; this is a hard time for any young man, and I promise I want to help, without getting judgemental. Don't tell your Mother we had this talk."
That's about how it went with me too :-)
You make teens sound like immoral animals.
Schoolkids reply 'Eat my shorts!'
The left and libertines are all for teaching the virtue of prudence in regards to sex (as regards unwed pregancy, though not STD's, oral-sex-only is a prudent means of achieving intimacy and sexual fulfillment/release), while sneering at chastity. The right tends to want to teach the virtue of chastity, and sneers at prudence. What is needed is to teach all the virtues, including a good exposition of why and how the virtue of chastity has served both individuals and societies well down through the years: including avoidance of the psychological and health consequences of early and promiscuous sex, and the degree to which condoms, sex-short-of-intercourse, and other prudent measures only ameliorate but do not remove the risks and emotional consequences.
It would also be nice to include a good exposition of how all religious and philosophical traditions represented in our society have dealt with the sexuality, but doing in America this would require some delicacy in the face of the "wall-of-separation" fanatics. I suppose in Britain, the Anglican view could be taught, though as a former Anglican heretic, I'm not sure how useful that would be these days.
Sure. I would guess many have.
Seriously, though, I remember many lessons from his heart-to-heart with me. First, losing one's virginity is not a race. It didn't matter what stories were told about which girls in the locker room. Being armed with information (and by that, I mean graphic physical descriptions of anatomy and process) helped me understand that 90% of those stories were BS anyway. And the other 10% did not involve a gentleman, or they wouldn't be told.
Second, it taught me that my father trusted me, not to be perfect, but to be aware, discriminating, and prepared.
Thirdly, when "the day" finally arrived, I was more emotionally settled and, while there was a certain delicious guilt surrounding the event, I wasn't terrified of subsequent health or pregnancy issues.
I think the talk was the beginning of that transition that all men hope to have...when your Dad becomes your friend. I treasure my relationship with Dad, and strive to duplicate that relationship with my own son.
Is that drunknsage or drunkgirl from Saturday Night Live?
ROTFLMAO!
This thread is better than most. Something for oral sex afficionados, homeschoolers, weepy Dad-Lovers, Bible thumpers, those who like to remember their glory days...
About 95% of the Freeper population falls into at least one of those categories.
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