A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day....02-06-03...A Pit Stop by John Huang

JohnHuang2, Billie, Dutchess | JohnHuang2

[The Thin Man]

FREE THIN MAN !!

Lol......and all this time I thought I was free. Guess I've been living in blissful ignorance. Yes, by all means, FREE ME!

[The Thin Man]

Billie, how kind of you to help dutchess in her time of distress. Never have I seen such a generous spirit.

[FreeTheHostages]

The situation is worse than we suspected. He is unaware that he is not free.

It does remind me of Auden's The Unknown Citizen, in which the state collects detailed information on a man whose life has come to its end. And this Orwellian poem ends:

What he happy, was he free?
The question is absurd.
If anything were wrong,
We certainly would have heard.

[LadyX]

"and all this time I thought I was free. Guess I've been living in blissful ignorance."

Oh, Thin Man - that is so very sad, that Billie had you living in blissful ignorance all these years.

My gosh, Man, it was no wonder you were in despair, under all that pressure, year after year.
The barbs - the insults - the ridicule, Man!

FreeTheSausages and I observed it, and it reverberated right through our souls, like a silver Mack truck bearing down upon us.
Rolled Bowled us over, it did.

Let The Campaign Begin ~
help us restore his dignity, and make him
the Not-So-Thin Man he deserves to be!!!

[LadyX]

S'okay, Billie.
I perceive the old spirit of Phil V.'s 'Altered Ego' has temporary possession of me.

I shall soon return to one of my other selves in due time,
as soon as I decide which color to wear.

[LadyX]

C'mon, Billie - phorgive me?

I don't like ta worry, and be so sad, like this - - -

[LadyX]

Dear John.

I really, really need ya to pen an essay ta Billie for me.
An apology, and make it a good one, will ya?

Yer devoted (non-critical) fan,

LadyX

[The Thin Man]

My gosh, Man, it was no wonder you were in despair, under all that pressure, year after year.
The barbs - the insults - the ridicule, Man!

And to think just a few minutes ago I was all gung-ho and ready to face the day. But, after reading your post and Sausages' typo-ridden poem, I've come to realize things are bleaker than I thought. Well, back to yesterday's tag line. :-)

[LadyX]

Oh, Arne - I thank you for coming to my rescue, thinking no one was going to help.
That actually drove me to talk to myself.

Prostate Prostrate with grief over having The Thin Man so depressed, and needing help, I was.

Forget the "Association of Individuals with Eating Disorders."
MrT has no disorder. He merely is constantly harrassed by Miss-U-No-Who, and unappreciated, right here in River City.

Take up your knife and sharpen your wit (or more, if you have more than one) to assess how to restore him to a modicum of normalcy.

It is the least we can do for inhumanity.

[ArneFufkin]

LadyX, JohnHuang2 has entrusted me to be his dayshift surrogate, so I am offering the following apology to Billie on your behalf: Dearest Billie,

Words cannot adequately describe
The profound nature of my regret
How very sorry I am to question
The wise and divine righteousness of your
Inhuman treatment of Thin Man
Humbly Praying you don't go "Photoshop" on me ...

LadyX

[FreeTheHostages]

I actually gave The Thin Man lots of cookies at tea yesterday and I think we should rename him the "The Appropriate Weight for His Height Man" and declare victory.

[LadyX]

"And to think just a few minutes ago I was all gung-ho and ready to face the day. But, after reading your post and Sausages' typo-ridden poem, I've come to realize things are bleaker than I thought. Well, back to yesterday's tag line. :-)"

Oh, dear - have I made things worse instead of better?
Woe is me - -

[FreeTheHostages]

Do you think tickling him would help? Or would he snap in two like a weak, brittle twig?

[LadyX]

(chuckling and snickering, I shall proceed to my probably deserved 'Time Out' in my room..:))

[LadyX]

"Do you think tickling him would help? Or would he snap in two like a weak, brittle twig?"

Wrong image, Free.
Kinda makes us appear to be 'feather'weights..:))

He perhaps would respond better to Divinity Fudge or Angel Food Cake.

[dutchess]

I didn't get pinged very early...:-(

My fault Aeronaut....I FORGOT TO POST THE PING LIST (AMONG OTHER THINGS LOL) I realized at around 7:00 a.m. NEVER have I jumped out of bed so fast...scared the poor animals (it's their bed too!) Forgive me????? PRETTY PLEASE????

[Billie]

To Mama Bear, Papa Bear, Gramma Bear, Grampa Bear, Aunt Bear, Uncle Bear, Cousin Bear, Baby Bear.......

Lori and family, have a wonderful, relaxing, refreshing SAFE cruise, 'cause when you get back, I'll be waiting for your next 'column' ...... impatiently!! :)

[LadyX]

"I think we should rename him the "The Appropriate Weight for His Height Man" and declare victory."

That is rather inconsiderate of you.
Think of posters typing in all those words to address him!

Even the acronym TAWfHHM is tough.

However, we are definitely turning the tide.

[Billie]

Sigh. Marry me.