Creationist Museum Aquires 5000 year old T-Rex Skeleton

The Onion ^

[chance33_98]

I would like to ax you to Donate to FreeRepublic.

[ALS]

I smell flames......

[chance33_98]

Amish boy with the axe is gonna put a whoopin' on some dinosaurs.

[Bogie]

5,000 years?

The Hebrews were already evolving (philosophy & theology only, of course), and trying to do away with, a corrupt "Culture of death" goverment in Egypt by then.

[Experiment 6-2-6]

According to Gill, the skeleton, which stands nearly 20 feet tall, possesses terrifying, razor-sharp teeth and claws, confirming that it was an evil beast in league with Satan, the Great Deceiver

I got as far as this when it started to dawn on me that this had to be the onion. Teach me to start looking at the source BEFORE I start reading..

[garbanzo]

5,000 years?

Well, the dinosaurs and the trilobites have to come in somewhere. Maybe the Egyptians used them as draft animals.

[Bogie]

LOL!

I hear trilobites taste like fried chicken!

[f.Christian]

Good News For The Day

‘But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.’ (Matthew 6:33)

"Once there was a change in our family situation. Our pet dog passed away and we salved our grief by acquiring a new one-a blue cattle pup. He was intelligent and very mischievous. We had a lot of fun with him. while he was small, he would amuse us by trying to catch his own tail and bite it. He would spy the tip of his tail out of the corner of his eye, and, readying himself, lunge at it, as if hunting prey. But of course, the more he pounced, the more his tail moved out of his reach. The only way a dog can really have its tail is to allow it to be an attachment to its main body."

"The... tail comes along just fine---when it is not its owner's preoccupation."

"Jesus advises us that though there are many good and important things, only one can be most important-the kingdom of God and his righteousness. First things must come first. All of life, with its experiences, decisions and relationships, needs to be evaluated in light of the highest ideal."

"When God is given pride of place, the machinery of existence operates at its best."

[Liberal Classic]

Using advanced dating processes from the cutting edge of biblical paleontology, the Oral Roberts team determined that Methuselah lived during the late Antediluvian period, or "The Age of the Dinosaurs." They said the pristine condition of the find strongly suggests that it perished in the Great Flood, fossilizing quickly and thoroughly due to the tremendous water pressure during the event.

Can you shed any light on to these so-called "advanced dating processes?" How do they know it's 5,000 years old, if they don't believe in radio carbon dating? Color me sceptical.

[f.Christian]

There are those footprints in the stone // mud . . . dinosaurs // human ! ! !

The fastest chess player - - - God . . . it's always your move ! ! !

[Liberal Classic]

Yes, I've been snookered. ;)

[Liberal Classic]

I'm sceptical about those alledged footprints of dinosaurs and man. Woolly mammoth fossils, on the other hand, have been found with arrow points stuck in them.

[clamper1797]

HAAA HAAA HAAAA HAAA (wiping tears from eyes)

And the foundation also has a bridge for sale ....

[Junior]

A little something to smile about ...

[Right Wing Professor]

"The fact that no human remains were found anywhere in the vicinity of the site of the skeleton serves as proof of the tyrannosaur's ferocity and huge appetite," Gill said.

Beautiful example of creationist logic! I'm convinced!

[Focault's Pendulum]

"One almost has to mourn that there was no room for it on the Ark."

Anyone else here notice the departure from the "literal" Bible?

BTW...good thing one of the keywords is humor. Now who did that?

[Aracelis]

Using advanced dating processes from the cutting edge of biblical paleontology

LMEBO (laughing my evolutionist butt off)!!! Great find!