How to Lose Friends and Alienate People

Newsmax ^ | Nov. 13, 2002 | David C. Stolinsky

[VoiceOfBruck]

But it will start out something like... "Your response to my questions is like all of the democrats agenda, ideas, and answers... empty, lacking thought, and symbolism over substance.'

That might help you feel better but it will only start a fight and galvanize her position, reinforce her prejudice, and "prove her point" in her own mind that all conservatives are nasty, selfish, oppressive, etc.

A better approach, if you're actually trying to convert her, is much like religious conversion (IMHO it _is_ a religious conversion) - neutralize her opposition with kindness and understanding, and lovingly try to point out the shortcomings of "her" way and try to convince her of the benefits of "your" way and her need to adhere to it.

I know this sounds wimpy, but I really think it's the only way. I would hazard a guess that no liberal has ever been converted to conservatism by unassailable logic conveyed in the context of a heated argument.

[Phantom Lord]

That is why I have not written back for a week now. Gonna go slow and take it easy on her. I have no delusions that I will convert her.

[stuartcr]

If that's what they talk about at dinner, I wouldn't want to be friends with either of them.

[VoiceOfBruck]

It's a very difficult subject, and FWIW, my experience is that hardcore liberals use issues to justify their own position, rather than the other way around. If you change something about how they view the issues, it won't matter - they'll just find some other reason to be a liberal.

I'm no psychologist (not even sure if I can spell it), but most of the liberals in my acquaintance simply hate republicans and conservatives (and in my case, independents), no more no less. It wouldn't matter if George Bush started curing diseases, sending manna from Heaven, walking on water, etc., they'd still hate him. I really think the way to liberate liberals is to help them recognize that republicans and conservatives are not the reasons for their problems and are not legitimate targets for their hatred.

[No Income Tax]

What's even worse is knowing people who think they're DEMOCRATS and actually VOTE democrat, yet lead a CONSERVATIVE lifestyle.

I have relatives who are like that. Their vote is based on perception rather than reality. They have a negative reaction to the word "conservative" even though that is how they live their lives.

[Noumenon]

Very interesting. Context and references? That would be very, very useful. Thanks.

[HIDEK6]

But it will start out something like... "Your response to my questions is like all of the democrats agenda, ideas, and answers... empty, lacking thought, and symbolism over substance.'

I don't think that tack will win friends or positively influence people.

My approach would be to explain why favoring a person's keeping his own money is the best way to care about him.