Posted on 11/29/2018 12:54:27 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
She should have used the word amenable, not amiable.
It is, and I will lead it as I want and can do it without any input from her.
As I've said, my life is my choice and I completely agree it isn't for everyone. I look at my parents marriage and my sisters marriage and I am very happy for both of them. But I can't put myself in their place and pretend that it would be what I want.
You found what you wanted, perhaps later in life than you would have preferred but the important thing is that you found it. That's the ideal outcome for everyone. It has made your life complete and given you happiness and contentment and I'm very happy for you. I realize that your advice is based on your hope that I find something like that myself. And I truly appreciate your sentiment. But your dreams aren't mine.
Some married women are just complainers. When they’re not griping about their husbands, they’re griping about their friends, or their siblings, or life in general.
When I was younger, I used to have coffee with a group of ladies once a month. Our children were all pre-school aged. These women took turns complaining about their husbands and their lives. I thought my husband was a great guy and still do. So I had little to say, because I didn’t think like them. It became less fun to hang around these women month after month, Soon I stopped attending their bitching sessions. I was a lot happier!
I suspect that if you start to pay closer attention to your married friends, you’ll find that they are types that enjoy complaining. I also suspect that not ALL of your married friends do this, but the loudest ones are the only ones you’re hearing.
That is Taliban thinking.
That is a straw man.
Got it. I just hate these kinds of threads where men blame all their relationship problems on women because the women they date are educated.
Except to a close confident (everyone needs to vent once in a while), married people should never bad mouth their spouses.
When a marriage goes sour it's usually because one or both members went into the marriage focused on him/herself, or thinking that he/she will be fulfilled in the marriage.
It is.
I disagree. Even 1 Corinthians, Chapter 7 allows for men and women who are not drawn to marriage and having children.
Actual statistics show the opposite.
I didn't get that at all from the article or the comments. What I read was an article by a woman of a certain age expressing regrets at having chosen career over family, with Freepers agreeing and disagreeing with her.
I come from a line of strong women. Women who make sure they are taken care of financially in their future on their own. You just never know what life is going to throw at you.
That’s smart. I would caution, however, against making work the focus of your life. I give this advice to women AND men.
No one looks back at his life from the perspective of old age and wishes he had spent more time at the office.
It’s also important to keep a clear head, realizing that in all those years in college you will not gain one bit of wisdom. Acquire the knowledge and the degrees, but steel yourself against the constant leftist brainwashing that is now inherent in higher education.
Not necessarily work, financial security.
This female bought into the “I can have everything” mantra.
I am female. 79 years old. I have a good high school education & SOME college courses, which I got in night school over 10 years after high school.
I started working in a real job when I was 17, at the Kroger Divisional offices in Madison, Wis. I was RECRUITED by their managers from high school ‘business machines classes’. I could use a calculator quite well, and also a Comptometer, a manual machine which has been replaced by computers. We checked & double checked incoming invoices before paying them.
In later jobs, I checked & verified invoices both incoming & outgoing, as an accounting function normal in those days. One boss told me in the late 60’s that “IF I didn’t get into college accounting classes, he would fire me”. He knew that computers were going to erase ‘comp operators’ & he saw some sort of potential in me.
I attended night classes, 2 nights a week for 4 years. I did not get an accounting degree, but I got enough accounting knowledge to be a good bookkeeper.
While still working full time in major companies, I worked nights, doing bookkeeping for small, often one-man businesses, and honed my skills. I charged ONLY for the hours I worked, NEVER have charged a minimum, and started out at $5 an hour in my billing. Some jobs called for weekly attention—most for monthly.
After one employer, (on the clock with a W-2), accused me of mailing a check for which there were no funds, I walked out. That was the last job I had with a W-2. I had $69 in the bank, and all my monthly bills & mortgage were paid. I owned my own house. I actually knew the vendor he was lying to & I got into the phone call & denied that mailing the check was MY idea. That was the summer of 1980.
I got the word out FAST that I was going to try & be SELF-Employed, and that I needed more clients. Word of mouth only. Wasn’t easy, and I worked many a night into the wee hours. Especially in January, closing books, doing all W-2’s & 1099’s, and end of year payroll reports & sales tax reports. I found work with many SMALL businesses. Largest one had 18 employees on the books. Most were single owners or just one employee. BUT-—ALL businesses need their bookkeeping done. ALL of them.
However, I did build a decent business with as many as 19 clients at one time. I did books in paper ledgers until Nov
of 1991. I bought a computer, software & printer & a friend who understood computers trained me on that Dac East accounting system. I STILL AM USING THAT SYSTEM. To learn the system, I spent days & nights being tutored, and I re-did ALL the paper ledgers for my clients (at NO CHARGE TO THEM) as a learning process. That was 11 months of bookkeeping for I don’t remember how many clients . But I learned that system.
I owned my house, my car, and eventually was able to buy horses, a truck, trailer & compete in a sport called endurance racing. During 1988 season, I was asked to race for National Points in that sport on another person’s horse. I put over 30,000 miles on the truck & trailer & was quite successful. I was out of the county where I lived 61 days that year, but still billed over $63,000 at $18 an hour. That averaged out to about 78 HOURS a week when I was IN TOWN. The rest of that time, I was either driving or riding or camped out at base camps.
I bought another house in a different part of the state & moved there in 1993. I was able to keep 2 clients, who mailed me their data & I mailed data back. One of those clients just retired, and I did work for his company for OVER 45 years. I am still doing work for the other guy & I have done so for over 48 years. I am still using the same DOS computer & accounting system & printer & monitor.
I now live in rural N Nevada on property I own free & clear with my horses & dogs. I have been married 2 times for a total of less than 50 months. I have lived alone, but I have many friends & have riding partners. I have some riders I have competed with for over 33 years.
I have had a decent life, and have seen alot of the USA on horseback.
I never was part of the generations that were told ‘You Can Do It ALL’. I was taught to work hard & do my best.
I did just that. I cannot think of much I would change—except the 2nd marriage. I claim temporary insanity over that. That’s my story & I’m sticking to it.!!
This woman made her choices. Seems she has put herself into a funk. She can find hobbies or other things outside of work to do, but she is not seeming to do so.
It’s been my experience that men are relieved that women have an education and a well paying job. It takes the pressure off of them to be the sole breadwinner. The man I’m speaking of was born in the early 60’s too-long before “soy-boys” were around.
She was brave stepping forward...
When families were larger, it was common (at least among Catholics) for there to be a son desiring to be a Priest or a “spinster” daughter or two. I think this modern phenomenon of never marrying gets more attention because fewer children are being born now, people are living longer, and they’re complaining more.
Really? At the age of 48, I met a great guy who wanted much more from me than I from him, and he was younger.
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