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Posted on 04/20/2015 9:14:41 AM PDT by No One Special
I was wondering who the “we” was when you said “But even back then, we knew better than to leave them unattended in a car.”
How many have died while in foster care and otherwise in the custody of the state?
What are the odds that a kid who is never left alone for five minutes will grown up to be a balanced adult?
Yes, many years ago I let my 7 year-old son and 10-year old daughter remain in our car near the entrance to a store I needed to run into for a very few minutes. Safe neighborhood, etc., but this was out of character for me at the time.
As I was paying for my purchase, a clearly distraught older man hurried into the store carrying my bloody son in his arms. The bottom line is that my son was amusing himself flipping a nickel in the air while my daughter read, and accidentally flipped it out the car window where it rolled under the car next to ours. He got out and spotted the nickel, and reached under the back of the car to get his coin.
Meantime, the driver returned from the from the other direction, got inside and started the car and began backing out after checking his mirrors. His bumper caused a serious gash and scrape on my son’s side, and I rushed him to the ER since the emergency services couldn’t decide who had jurisdiction.
He eventually healed ok but had a very painful injury, still has a bad scar in his 40’s. He now has two small boys of his own (the ultimate parental revenge) who have heard how Dad got hurt. I would not do that again, and would never assume that normally “responsible” kids can’t get into a bad fix very quickly. It happened too fast for my daughter to realize what was happening and call out. It could have been much worse, of course. I always regretted not taking them with me that day. Since then, during my working years, I saw far too many innocent situations go sour. For the record, neither of my kids turned out to be timid or fearful, and both are very productive, responsible adults. 7 year-olds just do dumb things at times, period.
Then tell me where you would draw the line. Is there a time limit? A temperature? An age limit? Lets be real, people who do this are putting their children at risk. I have 2 kids, 10 and 12 years old, if they do not want to come into the store with me I let them stay in the car. They know that they are not to leave the car. They know not to let anyone into the car. Are they at risk? Sure they are. But they aren’t toddlers. Anyone who feels that it is ok to leave a 4 year old alone in a parking lot should seriously rethink things.
And at the age of 7, I flew over my handlebars, knocked out a tooth, and began a history of dental problems that have followed me to this day.
Life is tough. Stuff happens. I hope my mother hasn’t been plagued by this incident, but I wouldn’t have done anything different, other than hit the brakes to slow down a little earlier.
If they are your kids, you draw the line. If they aren’t your kids and the line you draw for some one else is nuts or the reaction of the state is nuts and you choose to get the state involved, you are morally liable for not minding your own business. As some one said earlier, if you are concerned, camp out and make sure no one runs off with the kids, and then vent at the parent if it makes you feel better.
“Then tell me where you would draw the line.”
I wouldn’t draw the line. I’m not the person best suited to make that judgement. That person would be the parent, who can assess each situation as needed.
“Lets be real, people who do this are putting their children at risk.”
Let’s be even more real. Everyone on the planet is always at some risk, 24 hours a day. You can’t escape risk.
“Are they at risk? Sure they are.”
So you’ve made a judgement call, as a parent, that this is a risk you are willing to accept. Yet, you deny to other parents the freedom to make their own judgements.
You’re right. Things happen all the time that are out of our control. But this isn’t one of those times. This is something that someone chooses to do because it is easier for them. Of course a child cannot be watched every second of every day, but why add a danger into their lives that is avoidable. I let my kids run in the house, but I don’t hand them each a pair of scissors before they take off through the hallways. I don’t understand how any reasonable person can think that it is ok to leave a 4 year old alone in a parking lot.
There are lots of parking lots in lots of different places in the world. Some I wouldn’t send anyone into who isn’t in an armored vehicle. But this doesn’t mean I buy a tank. Instead, I opt not to drive through Detroit. Don’t lump all parking lots together.
First, just don't do things that attract attention, especially the police, (such as leave your small children in a car). Second, NEVER talk to the police without your attorney present.
Other then telling him to be more careful, we never did take the step of taking away his bike or forbidding him to ride his bike again out of our supervision. Though that might have been the reaction of many other parents. He must have learned his limits though because he never got into another bicycle accident again.
You are right about young kids doing dumb things. Unfortunately, we cannot be with them every minute of every day to protect them unless we want to completely isolate them from the outside world. And that's not a healthy way to raise a child.
I think back to when I was a kid. My mother would take me shopping and I'd much rather sit in the car and read a library book or even just listen to the car radio than to go inside of a store. I was in Little League then and I remember walking to practice and then walking back home afterwards. I don't think either of my parents ever came to a single Little League practice and I played Little League ball for years. Maybe one of them showed up for a game here and there but that was a rarity. That was not unusual by the way. In those days, most parents did not involve themselves in every second of their child's play.
When I put my own kids in Little League, every single kid had at least one parent sitting in a lawn chair - and that was for PRACTICE! God forbid you should actually miss an actual game. And once that game was over, you have 50 cars trying to leave the parking lot at the same time.
Don't get me going on bus stops! When I was growing up, I walked to school or I walked to the bus stop. Now maybe when I was in first grade, my mother walked me to the bus stop. But that was it.
These days, not only are parents at the bus stop for their HIGH SCHOOL children, but they actually drive their kids to the bus stop even if it's just a block away. I've literally seen it happen. A garage door will open and a minivan will back out and drive two houses down where it will idle until the bus arrives. Then you will see a fully grown 16-year-old kid step out of the vehicle and walk 15 steps to the bus while his mother waves and blows kisses the whole way.
This is just way too much "helicopter" parenting for me.
No wonder so many adult children never leave the nest.
Let me ask you a question: Were you ever left alone in a car in a parking lot?
That is a totally specious argument. Not one of those children died because their parents ran into a store for ten minutes. You need to get your priorities out of my business.
Why take the chance? It’s called living. If you want to live in some false insulated bubble, that’s your choice. My kids will face life head on with the knowledge that comes from making decisions that have consequences and the consequences of a five minute nap in a car (where I can watch them from a storefront) doesn’t even register.
I have raised more kids than you, and can damn sure tell you that getting the nanny state involved in a family’s life is worse than your most paranoid delusions.
Same here. Underlying health conditions of some people mean that they could die in that "only 5 minute" dash into the store, leaving the child to an excruciatingly painful and sad death by hyperthermia.
I have two small ones and there are times I need to "run in", but I always take the kids with me, ALWAYS, or else "running in" just isn't that important and I'll wait on whatever I think I need.
[ The progressives way towards ensuring the “village” raises all our children: criminalize parental decisions. It’s for the children. ]
You would think that for a group that believes in evolution and natural selection they would simply walk by and let “Nature Take it’s Course” instead of trying to “Intelligently Designing” everyone else’s life even if they don’t want it managed by these control freaks.
Morons that push Darwin, want to constantly go against Darwin for soem reason...
“I don’t understand how any reasonable person can think that it is ok to leave a 4 year old alone in a parking lot.”
Maybe because most of us were left alone in parking lots as children, and we turned out just fine.
“Second, NEVER talk to the police without your attorney present. “
Hmmmm !
Does this include when reporting a possible crime or asking directions?
.
Better safe than sorry, look what happened to Richard Jewell when he reported a crime...
You grew up like me. Recently, I returned to my childhood neighborhood and was shocked to see school guards minding the streets around...the high school! My generation would have scorned that. A 17 year old can’t cross the street without a 90 year old crossing guard?
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