Posted on 05/28/2010 9:47:18 AM PDT by Ancient Drive
No, you can’t ignore history.
But you can’t let yourself be ruled by it and have your future determined by it either.
Had your grandfather already struck out three times prior to meeting your grandmother? Probably not. I’m sure they were lovely people and I doubt your grandmother married him because of his money, like so many younger women with older men these days.
“...sure they were lovely people and I doubt your grandmother married him because of his money,”
Sure as hell not for money.
He was a Wyoming cowboy, nicknamed Tex by his friends and relatives. Worked a bit in the Cody Wild West show.
Nobody knows for sure if he was even ever in Texas.
He was son of two immigrants from Sweden she was daughter of Mormons who moved from Southern Utah to near the Wyoming-Montana border, where she was born.
Posts 134 and 154 are good indicators of people who would like to see Rush succeed in this, even though these posters are wholly pessimistic that this marriage will actually succeed. In my opinion, these posts at 134 and 154 are examples of people who aren't invested in the failure of this prospective marriage.
However, posts 12, 25, 56, 65, 78, 90, 119, 121, 146, 150, 161, 272, 288, 383, 438 are examples of posts by people who want to see this fail. You might read these and not see that in the posts. In my view, that is possible only if people are just writing these posts with no investment of expectation or personal responsibility. Basically, I would agree with someone who says they don't see a desire for failure, if these posts were so much blather. Certainly some of them are.
But people who posted these comments have their own reasons for doing so. And if there is anything I hold to be a truism, it is that people who make strong, declarative statements of what they view as fact don't like to be proven wrong.
Those posters have their own reasons. Divorce is shameful, it doesn't jibe with "family values", only liberal men date women 20 years their junior, his failed marriages indicate he isn't suited to marriage, she is exploiting it for the money and he looks stupid because he doesn't see it, whatever. Some people probably project their own bitterness into it, and think that if they have been unable to find happiness in marriage, the same is always going to be true with him. Some women may have had husbands leave them for younger women, who knows?
The point is, if these posters wanted Rush and his fiancee to succeed, all they had to do was include a conditional statement "I would like to see this work, but..." and that would do the trick.
I will concede that some of those posters might simply be pessimistic if I disregard the strong, actually, nearly overpowering, judgmental nature of many of them. FR is a open forum, and has less political correctness than some other forums, so if people take that approach, it is their choice.
I choose not to take that approach. I am an optimist, and I always think that perhaps this will work, even if it has failed many times in the past. I believe you must consider the past, but if you are ruled by it, that is often just as bad as disregarding it completely. Personally, I know several couples who have this type of age differential, and the marriages are still going strong over time, so I have history for thinking it may work.
But that won't stop me from keeping in mind that it might not succeed. I am just not invested in the concept that it will fail.
I think they are being realistic. I have a friend I have known for over 50 years. He gave up after five divorces. He gets no slack from me.
I can accept your take on it, FRiend. I have a different take on it.
I suppose, if I personally knew someone who had five divorces, I might be more inclined to agree, but I don’t. I know a very few who have been divorced twice, and a fair number only once. Five times might make me view things in a different light.
To use a football analogy, If my team is down by three touchdowns with 4 minutes left to play, and the analyst puts a stat up that says that no team has scored three touchsdowns in four minutes, even though this situation has come up 273 times.
I am the one who instead of becoming downcast, says: “The odds gotta even out sometime, those are really long! Why not now?”
And I feel that way about people. I do believe in redemption. I believe, as Archimides did when referring to the earth, that given the right lever or place to stand, people can change not only their own behavior, but history. And that in no way discounts what I know of human nature, or causes me to miss things I should be seeing because I have am thought to wear a rose-colored lens. I see things, and I have hope.
Not the “hope” or “change” of Barack Obama and his followers that thinks all humans are beautiful and pure, or can be if given the right chance to be, but instead I have the hope of Ronald Reagan exemplified when he said “Trust but verify!” There is no conflict I see in preparing for the worst, and hoping for the best.
Well .. at least Rush is the marrying kind .. and not the sleeping around with several women kind.
It may have taken him 4 tries .. but at least this gal doesn’t seem to be looking for fame and fortune. I remember seeing her when Rush gave his TV interviews after his heart attack - she was definitely not a camera hog.
I think this might be the right one!
There is a reason it is 0 for 273. There is a reason why Rush is 0 for 4. He has done nothing to help improve the odds. If fact, I would say his odds are worse.
I don't know the lady so I can't say for sure how this will work out. What I see is that he is repeating a cycle of marrying outside his 'envelope'. After my divorce, I dated some younger women but found total happiness with someone nearer my own age.
If you are not having children, why does age matter?
Great post.
I am using your find of hypocrisy being the worst thing you can call a liberal, in my arsenal of arguments. How true that is? No standards, thus you can’t fail! Nothing to try to achieve! Always keepin’ it real!
I am glad to see that in your photo, Kenny can close his eyes. I wasn’t at all sure he still could.
It is true. When you keep that in mind, the hypocrisy is the cardinal sin to liberals, worse than anything else to them, it explains a LOT of their behavior.
I detest liberalism, and this is one of the most disturbing aspects of it.
I read “Rules for Radicals” last summer, and using the charge of hypocrisy against your enemies, even if you have to manufacture it, is standard operating procedure.
I think it will be a little longer than that. Will look better for her in court when she goes for the "gold". How long did the "lovely and gracious" Marta (I cringed when he married her) last? Six or Seven years I think.
I hope for Rush's sake I am wrong, but every divorce kills a little bit of your soul and heart, (I have experience there) and I don't want Rush to get hurt anymore than he probably has in the past.
I think he was married to Marta for ten years.
In 2004, Joel married 23-year-old Katie Lee, left. At the time of the wedding, Joel was 55. Joel's daughter, Alexa Ray, then 18, middle, served as maid-of-honor. They split in 2009. In December 2009, Joel's daughter Alexa Ray was hospitalized after a reported suicide attempt.
Compatibility.A 60 year old guy and a 30 year old gal cannot *possibly* have anything in common with each other outside the bedroom.And *in* the bedroom it's *highly* unlikely that they'll both be truly "happy".
He's looking for a trophy wife and/or a brood mare.She's looking for glamor,status and $$$.Guaranteed.
Divorce court is once again in Rush's future.I'd wager everything I own on that.
Well, she’s 33, a big girl now. And if Rush does want kids, then it makes sense to find a younger woman.
4th time a charm!
His first wife ran off after an affair.
His second wife, just graduated from college when they married, ran off with another man.
His third wife was certifiable but, now, very rich and nuts.
The latest diversion is two and a half decades younger.
But cunning enough to snag him. Not that, as history shows, it takes much.
But marrying a little lollipop makes sense in a way. He needs to be the boss. Have total control. Be in charge. That is easier with a little skull full of fluff.
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