Posted on 01/20/2008 9:42:43 PM PST by Bear_Slayer
Likewise ... the "idea" that Man and Woman should be at cross purposes ("battle of the sexes" and similar idiotic phrases) is straight from the Pit of Hell.
I appreciate the PM ... but IMO that should be out in the open, for reasonable discussion ... same as the list at the top of the thread.
Very funny.
Now, go pick up the crap you left all over the house. I am NOT your maid OR your mother. Get over it.
OK
1. If a woman tells you about her day, her problems or her concerns, she doesn’t expect you to fix anything. She needs someone to hear her, that’s all. Just listen. Often it’s an act of verbal sorting and your giving an ear etc is the best thing you can do. Trying to come up with a solution or fix things will just frustrate you both.
2. Don’t act or even try to believe that housework is beneath you. Help is appreciated and goes a long way towards respect and trust. If you hate cleaning bathrooms, guess what, she hates it too. And nothing makes a woman turn off to sex quicker than a man who gets all frisky after she’s spent the last 2 hours before bedtime taking care off hearth and home. That just puts it into the ‘job’ catagory in her head.
3. Remember, women would rather have no sex at all than bad sex (and yes, we know, to men, there is no such thing as bad sex). And even more inversely, while you use sex to relax, she has to relax to enjoy sex. Just keep it in mind.
4. Have a job and keep it. Doesn’t have to be great or earth shaking. You don’t have to be Donald Trump. But a guy who has a steady job, who takes pride in his work, who pays his bills and is reliable is a very good thing.
5. Be faithful. It may be just sex to you, but to her, you’ve pretty much destroyed the relationship. She’d rather have you break it off than cheat on her.
6. Love your mother (and family in general). No, I’m not saying be a Mama’s boy, just how you treat your mother-— respect, thoughtfulness etc translates into how you’ll treat her and all women.
7. Give her postive feedback. Look, her world is almost nothing but negative put downs. Every magazine, TV show, commercial out there seems to tell her that her butt is too big, she’s too old and worthless, she weighs too much, her hair is too curly, her boobs are too small-— that she is nothing but one big mass of flaws to be fixed and totally worthless until they are fixed.
She doesn’t need to hear the same from you. So no, helpful remarks like “Maybe you need to loose a few pounds” is just another attack and lumps you in with those who don’t love her. Don’t lie, but damn, tell her about what you do love about her.
8. Give her her space. Yes, some women may be clingy, but there are just as many out there who like to just be left alone sometimes— to read a book, write a letter, just daydream. Don’t take it as rejection or she must have a boyfriend. Don’t keep calling upstairs to ask her what she’s doing. Don’t follow her in the bathroom while she’s soaking in the tub just to ‘see what she’s doing’. She’ll function a whole lot better if she’s allowed her hermit time.
9. LEAVE HER STUFF ALONE!!!! She’ll leave yours alone. She may collect cookbooks, shoes, dolls, arts supplies etc. You collect fishing lures, deer heads, feed & seed store caps etc. No one’s stuff has more value.
10. Don’t be selfish. I don’t know how else to put it, but if you go to get a glass of water, ask her if she’d like one. If you like having your back rubbed, offer to rub hers. If she’s sick, let her stay in bed while you take care of things. Women are trained to be givers, but it can wear on even the most noble of them.
Sounds interesting. Could you please ping me too?
Sure. No problem, there ... Guys: If you haven't told your wife she's beautiful, today ... WTF is wrong with you?
OTOH ... don't ask me a question, if you don't want a straight up honest answer.
I don't care how 'cute' you thought that dress was at the store ... It ain't you. It really looks bad on you. DON'T WEAR IT!!!. Or maybe it looks GREAT! Either way, you're getting the truth. You're welcome.
Well, of course that’s what I mean...I cry when it’s appropriate to cry. I’m referring to women who cry during arguments...I HATE IT...
Look, both genders catch hell out there, on all male or all female forums.
I’ve never seen a ‘bashing’ men thread here, but hardly week goes by without me noting at least 2 or three “Wimmen R’Evil” threads. It gets tiring. I don’t come here to be beat up even more than I’ve already been. I come here to learn and hopefully, give insight and input of my own.
Honestly,
most of the time when I see someone cry its for a good reason.
But crying to manipulate is wrong.
Same can be said for men who start raising their voices and waving their arms-— just as manipulative and as quick to shut a discussion down.
Reminds me of something I heard a comic say once: "I've been single for a year or so. It's driving me nuts. All may friends say 'Hey, do what you're good at...what you love and you'll meet plenty of women.' So I've been sitting around the last couple months, getting stoned and watching reruns of Star Trek and guess what? No one's knockin' the door down..."
"Sexes", my dear ... Men and women have "sex". Nouns and adjectives have "gender". < /pedant >
That said, popular culture is poisonous. It would have us at each others' throats, constantly, and not without effect. I've seen real life examples that make the TV-stereotype "Mom is a bitch, Dad is a moron, Kids are mouthy brats" look mild. And they think they're normal.
So sayeth the soothsayer!
I like the Wormtongue analogy
Exactly,
if something looks bad,
tell her.....
but malice or love can be hidden in that telling....
I guess what I’m saying,
what you really feel for your spouse is shown in those moments.
And it plays out here too.
Now...if we could just find the husband who would take up the role that allows the wife the opportunity to "take her place."
We've screwed the family by telling the world that women "can do it all."
"You can bring home the bacon.
Fry it up in a pan;
And never let him forget
He's a man...cause you're a woman."
THAT IS BS.
Add to that the above-stated roles of "bacon winner," housewife, cook and "mistress"...the role of "mother;" and you're really spoilin' for failure; and the first thing to go is libido. (If the husband allows the wife to continue at this pace, "love" may follow libido out the door.)
Well, it fits.
Move the dog.
Follow the responses to 151. I was asking Bear_Slayer to ping me to his next project once it's written. He said he would.
Ladies; sometimes it's not all about you.
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