Posted on 11/03/2006 8:59:35 AM PST by rface
Tiger Rag
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Hold that tiger
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
Where's that tiger?
He's dead, Wendy. Let him go.
Missouri has evolved from the "Show Me" state to the
"Bury Me Deeper" state , it seems.
My question is this...if the dead dudes can be legal to vote...can they be legal to count in a census?
If the answer is yes...then we in Alabama need to start counting tombstones and hustle up fourteen million additional dead dudes and get our fair share of representation in congress.
Being from the great state of Alabama...we are proud of our dead relatives heritage and their desire to remain true-blue American citizens even one hundred years after their death. We feel...they'd want to be counted...and we need to be as fair as we can about this whole thing.
I also think that we should allow dead politicans to continue in office, and that we should be able to elect formerly dead senators back into office. I'd like to bring Henry Clay back into office and have him represent a large chunk of our dead voters in Alabama. The only negative about this whole thing...is that this might end up like a Stephen King novel...like that cat cemetary thing...and then we'd need a bunch of Baptists to bail us out.
Proof that there is life after death. God is alive!
and the dems in Maryland are screaming about Republicans having written guidelines for poll watchers.
"DemoRat Vote Fraud" bump!
Well, now we know why McCaskill is so big on nursing homes-potential voters..
Bookmarked.
Thank you!
(MSM actual reporting and investigation alert!)
Death? Be kind, life without parole.
Its damned good enterprise journalism in my book.
I bet most of them are Democrats.
Missouri: The Snow Me State
And they are all in urban precincts and their have a higher turnout than the rest of the living populous?????? Gosh, not much more suspicious than the 2700 dead people who have already voted early in New York (4 to 1 Democrat).
Just a little political humor. Sent to me by email. Enjoy...
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a
truck and dies.
His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there
is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so
we're not sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," says the man
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have
you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to
spend eternity."
"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.
"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down,
down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green
golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are
all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake
his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at
the expense of the people.
They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and
champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good
time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before
he realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter
is waiting for him.
"Now it's time to visit heaven."
So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving
from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time
and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose
your eternity."
The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never
have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would
be better off in hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to
hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land
covered with waste and garbage.
He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting
it in black bags as more trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I don't
understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a
golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne,
and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of
garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were
campaigning...... Today you voted."
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.