Our 1st Quarter Freepathon is Underway! - Thread 3

Photo at Voodootime ^ | 1/6/04 | Coop

[Gabz]

Just funnin' with ya - because I totally agree with you!!!

[Mo1]

Another email from a good friend

Democrat/Republican

"A young woman was about to finish her first year of college.
She considered herself to be a very liberal Democrat, but her father was a staunch Republican.
One day she was challenging her father on his beliefs and his opposition to high taxes and welfare programs.
He stopped her and asked how she was doing in school.
She answered that she had a 4.0 GPA, but it was really tough.
She had to study all the time and never had time to go out and party.
She didn't have time for a boyfriend and didn't really have many college friends because of spending all her time studying.
On top of that, the part-time job her father insisted she keep left absolutely no time for anything else.
He asked, 'How is your friend Mary?' She replied that Mary was barely getting by.
She had a 2.0 GPA, never studied, but was very popular on campus, didn't have a job, and went to all the parties.
She was always complaining about not having any money, but didn't want to work.
Why, she often didn't show up for classes because she was hung over.
Dad then asked his daughter why she didn't go to the Dean's office and request that 1.0 be taken off her 4.0 and given it to her friend who only had a 2.0.
That way they would both have a respectable 3.0 GPA.
Then, she could also give her friend half the money she'd earned from her job so that her friend would no longer be broke.
The daughter angrily fired back, 'That wouldn't be fair. I worked really hard for my grades and money, and Mary just loafs.
Why should her laziness and irresponsibility be rewarded with half of what I've worked for?'

The father slowly smiled and said, 'Welcome to the Republican Party'." --Unattributed

[Conspiracy Guy]

I love that one. I've had it in my files for years.

[Gabz]

LOL!!! On new Year's Eve I was out shopping with my 5yo, my niece and my sister in law. We were in an old fashioned 5 & 10 that has everything under the sun. We were talking with a couple of the women who work there when my daughter comes rushing up "Mommy, mommy look I found marbles, we have to get them for Daddy because his are all lost"

I nearly fell on the floor.

[Gabz]

I tried to avoid opening tag lines myself too - I was notorious for leaving them open - and I didn't know how to fix the problem!!!

[Mo1]

"Mommy, mommy look I found marbles, we have to get them for Daddy because his are all lost"

LOL!!! ... Kids are funny

[Gabz]

That's great!

[Conspiracy Guy]

Great! Have fun.

[RottiBiz]

LOL! I still don't.

[Mo1]

A WOMAN'S (REAL) PRAYER: Now I lay me Down to sleep. I pray the Lord My shape to keep. Please no wrinkles Please no bags And please lift my butt Before it sags. Please no age spots Please no gray And as for my belly, Please take it away. Please keep me healthy Please keep me young, And thank you Dear Lord For all that you' ve done.

Five tips for a woman....

1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.

2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you.

4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.

5. It is important that these four men don't know each other.

[Gabz]

It was hilarious - and the poor kid had no idea why we were all laughing.

The truth of the matter is hubby has two wooden games that are played with marbles, I had to hide them because Jax kept playing with them and I was forever finding them all over the house. When she asked for them earlier in the week I had told her they were lost. thus daddy lost his marbles!!!

[RottiBiz]

Ah, I feel better now.

I was also thinking that maybe you hadn't gotten over not getting one for your 5th birthday!

Yes, ponies are neat.

[Gabz]

ROFL!!!!

I love the last line.

[Mo1]

Here another one that Libby posted .. LOL


A couple of rednecks are out in the woods hunting, when one of them suddenly grabs his chest and falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps to the operator, "I think Bubba is dead! What should I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, "Just take it easy and follow my instructions. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence... and then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line, "Okay, now what?

[Gabz]

When I first posted the real estate listing picture of this house, with the big barn in the background, the whole crew on the WFTD thread started in on me about when was I going to be getting a pony. We live near Chincoteague Island with their famous annual pony swim and auction.

[Mo1]

It was hilarious - and the poor kid had no idea why we were all laughing.

That's what makes it even funnier

A couple years ago .. Jessie was in school and they were discussing where their families originally came from (immigration)

So all the kids would stand up and say what their heritage was

Jessie proudly stood up and told the class that her mommy was Irish and her Daddy was a Redneck

Lesson to all new parents .. Watch what you say to your kids ... *L*

[hoosiermama]

JUst got my monthly e-mail regarding contribution and increased it by $5.00.

Monthly is by far the easiest way to go......

[Gabz]

I'm sorry I'm laughing - but that is funny. Poor Jessie.

[RottiBiz]

Voila! Thank you very much!

[RottiBiz]

(I found the delete key.)