Skip to comments.
Pulled Thread by FR Admin
Posted on 10/15/2003 5:12:48 PM PDT by SandRat
click here to read article
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20, 21-40, 41-60, 61-80 ... 121-122 next last
To: SandRat
I liked that thread, if only for its shock value!
41
posted on
10/15/2003 5:37:21 PM PDT
by
Pan_Yans Wife
(You may forget the one with whom you have laughed, but never the one with whom you have wept.)
To: SandRat
Do turn him in.
42
posted on
10/15/2003 5:38:26 PM PDT
by
MEG33
To: SandRat
43
posted on
10/15/2003 5:39:42 PM PDT
by
martin_fierro
(A v v n c v l v s M a x i m v s)
To: Stultis
The Hungarian Phrasebook sketch from Monty Python's Flying Circus
Set: A tobacconist's shop.
Text on screen: In 1970, the British Empire lay in ruins, and foreign
nationalists frequented the streets - many of them Hungarians
(not the streets - the foreign nationals). Anyway, many of
these Hungarians went into tobacconist's shops to buy
cigarettes....
A Hungarian tourist (John Cleese) approaches the clerk (Terry Jones). The
tourist is reading haltingly from a phrase book.
Hungarian: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Sorry?
Hungarian I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Uh, no, no, no. This is a tobacconist's.
Hungarian: Ah! I will not buy this *tobacconist's*, it is scratched.
Clerk: No, no, no, no. Tobacco...um...cigarettes (holds up a pack).
Hungarian: Ya! See-gar-ets! Ya! Uh...My hovercraft is full of eels.
Clerk: Sorry?
Hungarian: My hovercraft (pantomimes puffing a cigarette)...is full of eels
(pretends to strike a match).
Clerk: Ahh, matches!
Hungarian: Ya! Ya! Ya! Ya! Do you waaaaant...do you waaaaaant...to come
back to my place, bouncy bouncy?
Clerk: Here, I don't think you're using that thing right.
Hungarian: You great poof.
Clerk: That'll be six and six, please.
Hungarian: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
I...I am no longer infected.
Clerk: Uh, may I, uh...(takes phrase book, flips through it)...Costs six and
six...ah, here we are. (speaks weird Hungarian-sounding words)
Hungarian punches the clerk.
Meanwhile, a policeman (Graham Chapman) on a quiet street cups his ear as if
hearing a cry of distress. He sprints for many blocks and finally enters the
tobacconist's.
Cop: What's going on here then?
Hungarian: Ah. You have beautiful thighs.
Cop: (looks down at himself) WHAT?!?
Clerk: He hit me!
Hungarian: Drop your panties, Sir William; I cannot wait 'til lunchtime.
(points at clerk)
Cop: RIGHT!!! (drags Hungarian away by the arm)
Hungarian: (indignantly) My nipples explode with delight!
(scene switches to a courtroom. Characters are all in powdered wigs and
judicial robes, except publisher and cop. Characters:
Judge: Terry Jones
Bailiff: Eric Idle
Lawyer: John Cleese
Cop: Graham (still)
Publisher: Michael Palin )
Bailiff: Call Alexander Yalt!
(voices sing out the name several times)
Judge: Oh, shut up!
Bailiff: (to publisher) You are Alexander Yalt?
Publisher: (in a sing-songy voice) Oh, I am.
Bailiff: Skip the impersonations. You are Alexander Yalt?
Publisher: I am.
Bailiff: You are hereby charged that on the 28th day of May, 1970, you did
willfully, unlawfully, and with malice of forethought, publish an
alleged English-Hungarian phrase book with intent to cause a breach
of the peace. How do you plead?
Publisher: Not guilty.
Bailiff: You live at 46 Horton Terrace?
Publisher: I do live at 46 Horton terrace.
Bailiff: You are the director of a publishing company?
Publisher: I am the director of a publishing company.
Bailiff: Your company publishes phrase books?
Publisher: My company does publish phrase books.
Bailiff: You did say 46 Horton Terrace, did you?
Publisher: Yes.
Bailiff: (strikes a gong) Ah! Got him!
(lawyer and cop applaud, laugh)
Judge: Get on with it, get on with it.
Bailiff: That's fine. On the 28th of May, you published this phrase book.
Publisher: I did.
Bailiff: I quote on example. The Hungarian phrase meaning "Can you direct me
to the station?" is translated by the English phrase, "Please fondle
my bum."
Publisher: I wish to plead incompetence.
Cop: (stands) Please may I ask for an adjournment, m'lord?
Judge: An adjournment? Certainly not!
(the cop sits down again, emitting perhaps the longest and loudest release of
bodily gas in the history of the universe.)
Judge: Why on earth didn't you say WHY you wanted an adjournment?
Cop: I didn't know an acceptable legal phrase, m'lord.
(cut to ancient footage of old women applauding)
Judge: (banging + swinging gavel) If there's any more stock film of women
applauding, I'll clear the court.
44
posted on
10/15/2003 5:40:48 PM PDT
by
Spruce
To: strela
Cute bunny with a pancake!
45
posted on
10/15/2003 5:43:31 PM PDT
by
CheneyChick
(Let the Hauskleaning Begin)
To: SandRat
WTF?
To: SandRat
Take a deep breath, stand up from the computer, and take a nice walk around the block. It will do you good.
To: Spruce
![](http://www.neuroinformatik.ruhr-uni-bochum.de/PEOPLE/bolder/montypython/pics/larch1.gif)
The Larch.
48
posted on
10/15/2003 5:46:53 PM PDT
by
Rocko
To: strela
I don't think it's fair that other bunnies don't have pancakes. Perhaps the bunny with the pancake should have most of it's pancake taken away and devided among the bunnies that have none.
49
posted on
10/15/2003 5:47:38 PM PDT
by
Spruce
To: EggsAckley
Ifit is the one I am thinking of, it was a public posting asking if it was time to assasinate the President. I hope that joker does get turned in. As much I hate Billary, I have never wished them dead. Liberals seem to be willing to go to any length, even despicable ones, to gain power. Sickos.
50
posted on
10/15/2003 5:49:24 PM PDT
by
hilaryrhymeswithrich
(Al Franken is a pimple on the butt of liberalism)
To: Roscoe Karns; SandRat
Oh, those wacky Brits!........Whack his pee-pee, but good!
51
posted on
10/15/2003 5:53:24 PM PDT
by
DoctorMichael
(Thats my story, and I'm sticking to it.)
To: SandRat
If posters go to
AndrewSullivan.com and click on the link to the discussion at The Guardian, you can sign up and post your comments.
52
posted on
10/15/2003 5:54:28 PM PDT
by
Phantom Lord
(Distributor of Pain, Your Loss Becomes My Gain)
To: DoctorMichael
Just sent the Guardian a note.
53
posted on
10/15/2003 5:54:58 PM PDT
by
MEG33
To: SandRat
The poster on that Guardian thread "InKind" has rapier wit. He's slaying Democrats/liberals. Worth a read just for those posts.
To: EggsAckley
Well, I feel absolutely filthy. I followed the conversation from the Guardian to Littlegreenfootballs to the DU. Yuck. DU'ers are saying they wouldn't put it past the Administration to fake an attempted--I can't say it. Those people are unbelievable.
I'm going to take a shower now.
55
posted on
10/15/2003 5:56:41 PM PDT
by
hobson
(</*>)
To: humblegunner
I'm opussed ... not me --- gone !
sandratters ...
56
posted on
10/15/2003 5:57:00 PM PDT
by
f.Christian
(evolution vs intelligent design ... science3000 ... designeduniverse.com --- * architecture * !)
To: Spruce
I don't think it's fair that other bunnies don't have pancakes. Perhaps the bunny with the pancake should have most of it's pancake taken away and devided among the bunnies that have none. The bunny on the bottom already ate her pancake. Gluttony is its own punishment.
57
posted on
10/15/2003 5:57:17 PM PDT
by
strela
("We are the RNC. Resistance is futile. We will blend your political distinctiveness into our own.")
To: SandRat
The offending web site is at
Guardian Unlimited and it was posted by "Started by SimonF at 08:42am Oct 15, 2003 BST."
If you guessed an action similar to Pres. Lincoln vs. J.W. Booth you gessed correctly.
58
posted on
10/15/2003 6:00:11 PM PDT
by
SandRat
(Duty, Honor, Country. What else needs to be said?)
To: BOBTHENAILER
Playing devils advocate here, is it a crime to say this in Britian? I would guess it is like us calling for the assination of a foreign head of state here....
Not sure this is a crime in Britian, however it is definately in bad taste.....
To: Pan_Yans Wife
bouncy bouncy big boy?
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20, 21-40, 41-60, 61-80 ... 121-122 next last
Disclaimer:
Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual
posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its
management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the
exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson