[Pharmboy]

It's not political humor, but I figured you freeps would enjoy this if you haven't seen this before. And no, I am not an engineer.

[nevergore]

Engineer Bump!

NeverGore

[WIMom]

Too bad you're not an engineer, we really don't mind the teasing. Most engineers I know have the best engineer jokes.

The Knack

Did you know that EE's put the ee in geek? (or beer, depending on your mood.) Learned that from a fellow FReeper engineer!

[wbill]

I am an engineer. ROFL!

[Publius6961]

Great jokes.
These are keepers. Still laughing and cleaning my keyboard.
Alas, yes, I are one...

[Illbay]

This has been posted before, many times. And I have received it in my inbox I can't tell you how many times. Please don't waste space on the server posting email messages. Even if it's the first time you've ever read it, believe me, you are one of a tiny minority.

Please just put "fresh" news reports on FR.

Thanks.

[Pentagram]

Excellent!

[Tijeras_Slim]

I'm gona have me some fun today....
Get some about physicists and I can lay waste to the whole building.

[general_re]

Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work. The first said, "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered."
The second said, "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."
The third said, "I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded."
The fourth one said, "I like to operate on lawyers. They're heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and their butts are interchangeable."
Fifth surgeon said, "I like Engineers...they always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end..."

[GenXFreedomFighter]

I gotta print this out. Thanks, Pharmboy. It's jokes like this that make me really wish I'd finished my ME degree. Maybe someday...

[ABG(anybody but Gore)]

Thanks for finding this one! LOL!

[stainlessbanner]

I will share with my friends in CubeLand. These are great, Pharmboy!

[clodkicker]

Another engineer bump!

[RedBloodedAmerican]

[AUsome Joy]

My brother-in-law is an engineer and these ring so true. Ever sold a house to an engineer? That is a scream!!

[Ol' Sox]

Here's what happens when engineers have a cookout and their interest changes from hamburgers to how fast can they light the grill. (Scroll about 1/3 of the way down the page).

Cookin' Hamburgers and Lighting the Grill

[PA Engineer]

Bump. My wife will like these. :-)

[Harrison Bergeron]

Mama Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Engineers
(Sung to the familiar Willy Nelson tune about Cowboys)

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be engineers
Don't let them fix radars for middle class bucks
Make 'em be cowboys and bikers and such
Mama don't let your babies grow up to be engineers
They'll work overtime and they'll never be home
Not even with someone they love

Engineers ain't easy to love and they're harder to hold
They'd rather give you Dolby Surround than diamonds or gold
Palm pilot on belt loop and high water pants
Every day goes the same way
And if you don't annoy him and he don't complain
He'll probably rewire the house

(Repeat Chorus)

An engineer loves sweaty computer shows and new sci fi movies
Microprocessors and robots and socks that are white
Them that don't know him won't like him and them that do
Sometimes won't know how to take him
He's not weird he's just different and his pride won't let him
Ever be anything other than right

(Words by Harrison Bergeron, © 1999)

[JParris]

All seems practical to me. What's the Joke?

Yes, IR12.

[boris]

Two true stories about Werner Von Braun:

One day he found his assistant frantically preparing a huge report. They had ordered a gold-plated mirror and the purchasing dept. demanded a justification--saying the gold-plating was an unneccessary luxury. Equations and paragraphs flew. Von Braun stopped him and threw it all out. "Tell them that we ordered a gold-plated mirror because a solid-gold mirror would be too expensive."

They got the mirror.

==========

What we call "Fourth-of-July sparklers" are known in Germany as "Christmas sparklers." Von Braun ordered 100 in June for rocket ignition tests.

"Why did you buy Christmas sparklers in June?" came a question from on high.

"For experiments." This was the complete text of Von Braun's reply.

A short interval passed.

"What kind of experiments?" was the next question.

"Secret experiments."

End of matter.

--Boris

[BornOnTheFourth]

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm NOT an engineer, but a friend of mine is. I'm going to have to send these along...