The FReeper Foxhole Remembers Major John Howard & Pegasus Bridge (6/6/1944) - Jan. 28th, 2004

International Baccalaureate Extended Essay ^ | October 1998 | Alasdair McKay

[SAMWolf]

I'm sure somebody would object to the lead.

You could money on that. (Unless you're a Kennedy, then you can get buried at sea any way you want and before anyone else who has been waiting)

[SAMWolf]

Francis Drake's Discovery of Fruitcake

Has Aunt Matilda sent you a fruitcake for the holidays, a brick-like affair that looks and feels exactly like the one you found five years ago, forgotten in the back of a cupboard, and shipped to your cousin Rolf in secret retaliation for his previous year's gift of the stale gourmet peanut brittle that cost you fourteen hundred dollars in new bridgework? Did Rolf, suspecting skullduggery, press the thing into service as a bookend for a couple of years and then send it off, perhaps to his sister Gert (they never liked each other) who next launched it, freshly wrapped of course but otherwise cost-free (if not priceless) to her miserly Uncle Albert - Matilda's cousin? Has Aunt Matilda, though nobody's fool, now miscalculated the track of this fruitcake and landed it back with you, where it started? Not quite, because it didn't just fall out of the blue into that cupboard of yours in the first place; but you can't really remember where it did come from, can you? Consider this:

It was nearly Christmas 1579 as Francis Drake and his crew sailed the Golden Hind into the waters of what is now called the Indonesian Archipelago. They were two-thirds through their three-year "famous voyage" around the world, flush with victory and plunder. Drake was hoping to cap off the journey by gaining a potential commercial toehold for England in the region - and in the process he hoped to perhaps acquire a few tons of precious spices. Not least of all, he also needed to reprovision the Golden Hind for the long westward sail across the Indian Ocean. The wheeling and dealing to meet the first two goals, in which Drake succeeded as usual, had the side effect of meeting the last. But the consequences were felt far beyond the Golden Hind's larder, as we shall see.

In negotiating for trading contracts and spices, Drake came to meet the king of the island of Ternate, Babu. King Babu, whose impressive court and trappings are vividly described in the 1628 chronicle of the circumnavigation The World Encompassed, was interested in a potential military alliance with the English. In the course of various meetings, provisions were delivered to the Golden Hind:

"Accordingly ... we received what was there to be had ...an imperfect liquid sugar, a fruit ... cocoes ... and a kind of meal ...; whereof they make a kinde of cake which will keepe good at least 10 years; of this last we made the greatest quantity of our provision ..." The World Encompassed, p.89

However, shortly after leaving Teranate Drake found an uninhabited and bountiful little island where the Golden Hind stayed for 26 days while repairs were made and an abundance of food was gathered. Thus King Babu's fruitcakes were not needed after all and, as was to become the norm, were promptly forgotten - tucked away in the nooks and crannies of the Golden Hind. When she arrived home in England and after all the silver and gold and other treasure had been unloaded, a few were found here and there - some no doubt having been used as wheel-chocks for cannon carriages, others as doorstops and perhaps as caulking-mallets - but most were discovered lying innocently in the bottom of the ship, looking like ballast stones (and nearly as heavy).

On mention of the confections (to stretch the term) to Drake by those charged with placing the Golden Hind on display at Deptford, he shrugged and, it again almost being Christmas, casually ordered that they be distributed among the townsfolk. Drake never realized that with this mild remark he had fired a broadside equal to any he ever touched off against an invading armada, a rippling cascade of indestructible oblong cannon balls that ricochet without end through time and space, carooming worldwide through cuboards and closets - including yours and Aunt Matilda's - and that occasionally become briefly visible beneath a Christmas tree, towards the back of the pile of presents, where once noticed they invariably elicit a comment like "Who's that from? You know, it sure does look just like that fruitcake we sent Uncle Charlie in '86."

Author's note: Drake's visit to Teranate, King Babu, the quotation from the W.E. and the visit to the uninhabited island are all real; the rest is of course, ah, creative speculation. - Oliver Seeler

[Professional Engineer]

- some no doubt having been used as wheel-chocks for cannon carriages, others as doorstops and perhaps as caulking-mallets - but most were discovered lying innocently in the bottom of the ship, looking like ballast stones (and nearly as heavy).

They have a use!! I've been wondering for years. ROFLMAO!

[SAMWolf]

LOL! I thought it was cute. Don't let anyone know you're in anyway involved with discovering fruitcakes though. ;-)

[Professional Engineer]

RUH ROH! I just e-mailed it to my family and friends. LOL

[Darksheare]

OOPS.
I'll drive next time.

[Darksheare]

Afternoon.
LOTS of snow shuvvlin.
*ugh*
Just got out of the POST snow shuvvlin shower.
I still feel gross..

[SAMWolf]

You're shoveling snow, I'm picking up downed branches. Since the wind is picking up I'll probably be doing it abain tomorrow. They predicting more snow?

[snippy_about_it]

Howdy PE!!

[snippy_about_it]

Where'd you find that!!

Neener, neener. ;-) Scrounger's don't tell.

[Darksheare]

Small flurries with no further accumulation.
(I'll believe that when I grow a beard and get called Santa.)

Had almost a foot of snow, but it seems to have compacted down to a dense half foot layer of goo.
No downed wires or trees yet.
But, with idiots on the roads playing Mario Andretti, we'll have them soon enough.

[snippy_about_it]

LOL. Oh sure, you're someone I want to fly with.

"C'mon Snippy, let's see what happens when I do this...." LOL.

[Darksheare]

LOL!
"I bet I can make this go FASTER!"

[snippy_about_it]

Oh yeah! There must be some kind of rocket booster you can rig up. ;-)

[Darksheare]

*Evil glint of bad thought*
Yeah.. Rocket booster on it..

The idea, rocket boost for stub wing gliders.
The theory, more speed.

[SAMWolf]

Neener, neener. ;-) Scrounger's don't tell.

Touche'

[SAMWolf]

Amazing how people keep forgetting how to drive in the snow.

[snippy_about_it]

LOL. Gotcha! Maybe some of you is rubbing off on me. ;-)

[Darksheare]

Yup.
And alot of the people here that forget how to drive in the snow have 4 wheel drive.

[Professional Engineer]

The idea, rocket boost for stub wing gliders.
The theory, more speed.