Posted on 08/30/2003 3:05:17 PM PDT by ambrose
(From the UK Guardian)
The only person who managed to talk more tosh last week than Little was Gigi Goyette, who outed herself as Arnold Schwarzenegger's secret mistress for the past seven years, on a hilarious programme called Arnold Schwarzenegger - Made In Britain, a fascinating look back to his beginnings in bodybuilding contests.
The programme traced the Austrian's unlikely journey from a sweaty gym in Romford Road, East London, where a dear old couple called Wag and Dianne Bennett worked on building up his calves, to success in Hollywood and some of the finest bedrooms in America, including Gigi's.
Gigi solemnly informed us that what she and Arnie have been doing is what she likes to describe as "outercourse". This, film fans and political supporters of the Terminator alike will be relieved to discover, involves in one of Gigi's many memorable phrases: "no insertion". She was very strict about this.
Anything outside of the body, though, is fair game, said Gigi. "I could be standing on my head and getting head," she said, conjuring up an image which successfully erased all those pictures of naked hiking from the visual memory bank. Gigi described herself as not so much a mistress, more Arnie's "avenue of relaxation".
She also rejected claims in an American magazine that Schwarzenegger was a sex pest. "Sure," she said, "he will sometimes grab a woman's ass and say, like, 'Hey, you've got a nice ass,' but it is just, like, his way of making them feel better. Every woman likes to get a compliment from time to time." A point I intend to take up with Germaine Greer at the first possible opportunity.
I recall reading an article about when Arnold first met Maria. He remarked to Maria's mother that she (Maria) had a nice ass.
Chilling that you would make a characterization of me without reading my previous posts. Golly, please instruct me on how to respond to KC's inane post.
I never said all the women were lying, just Anna so far because I came across that story I previously posted and it just doesn't ring true for me.
From my previous post:
"When I went to shake his hand he pulled me on to his knee, saying 'I really want to know if your breasts are real.'" Anna told him they were an F cup, the British equivalent of a triple-D bra.
Here's where Anna and I differ, Arnold wouldn't have had time to ask me a question because I wouldn't have stayed on his lap. Yet she feels so threatened that she confesses her bra size to him. But let's all believe a woman that you McClintock supporters would normally be digusted with under any other circumstances.
I'm sure you'd drop McClintock like a hot rock if some limey liberal had a story from years ago where in she claims he fondled her.
ahhhhh, somebody's havin' a ba ba day! Yes, if McClintock had a history of treating woman the way (R)nold/Clinton do, I would indeed drop him, its called character. My guy has it, your's doesn't. What previous posts would I need to figure that out other than the one you posted to me?
You better reevaluate your position and "drop" him, FYI. All this "rallying" talk last week came straight from the desk of Bob Mulholund, who incedentally couldn't contain himself with joy in an interview shortly after (R)nold announced his candidacy. This is Anne, or Gigi, or Jennifer Flowers, or whoever will NOT be the last one we will hear of. Be happy you are hearing of this now rather than a week before the election, with "my" McClintock having been brow beaten out of the race by then.
LOL
Deja vu.
Truth is the enemy of both.
Golly, I know exactly what you are talking about, its a shame isn't it?
This type of behavior is just WRONG when it's directed at someone within the Republican Party
I believe what you meant to say was "This type of [sexual] behavior is just WRONG... [whether committed by] someone within the Republican Party [or Clinton].
and if you don't care, then YOU are the RINO.
I agree. Everybody agrees, heck even Bubba agree, right Bubba?
Truth is the enemy of both.
Bump!
Now, I look at all you cats and kitties out there
a whippin' and a wailin' and a jumpin' up and down
and suckin' up all that juice and pattin' each other on the back
and a hippin' each other who the greatest cat in the world is.Mr. Malenkov,
Mr. Talenkov,
Mr. Eisenhower,
Mr. Whoozerwheezer,
Mr. Whiserwhooser,
Mr. Woodhill,
Mr. Beachhill,
an' Mr. Churchill,
and all them other hills gonna get you straight,
and if they can't get you straight
they know a cat that knows a cat who'll straighten you.But I'm gonna put a cat on you
was the coolest, grooviest, swingin'est, wailin'est,
strongest, swingin'est cat that ever stomped on this jumpin' green sphere.And they called this here cat "The Nazz."
He was a carpenter kittie.
Now, The Nazz was the kind of a cat that come on so cool
and so groovey and so with-it
that when he laid it down,
WHA-BOM, it stayed there.Naturally all the rest of the cats said, "Man, look at that cat wail!
He's wailin' up a storm up there. Hey, I'm tellin' ya,
he layin' it down right, he...""Get off my back, Jack! What's the matter with you?
I'm tryin' to dig what the cat's puttin' down!"They're pushin' The Nazz to dig his miracle lick.
And The Nazz say, "Cool, babies.
Tell ya' what I'm gonna do.
I ain't gonna take two, four six, eight of you cats,
but I'm gonna take all twelve of you studs
and straighten you all at the same time."Say, "You cats look like you pretty hip."
He say, "You buddy with me."
So The Nazz and his buddies was goofin' off down the boulevard one day
and they run into a little cat with a bent frame.So The Nazz look at this little cat with the bent frame
and he say, "What's the matter wit' you, baby?"Little cat with the bent frame he said, "My frame is bent, Nazz."
Say, "It's been bent from in front."So The Nazz look at the little cat with a bent frame
and he put the golden eyes of love on this here little kittie
and he look right down into the window of the little cat's soul
and he say to the little cat, he say, "Straighten!"Rooom - Boom!
Unbent that little cat like an arrow.
And everybody's jumpin' up and down
sayin' "Look what The Nazz put on that boy!""You dug him before. Redig him now!"
Everyone's talkin' about The Nazz.
What a great cat he was.
How he swung with the glory of love.
How he straighten out the squares.How he stomp into the money changin' carts
and kicked the short change all over the place
and knockin' the corners off the squares.How he put it down to the one cat, dug it.
Didn't dig it.
Put it down twice, dug it.
Didn't dig it.
Put it down a third time, dug it.
Boom!
Walked away with his eyes buggin out in the air bumpin' into everybody.And they're pullin' on The Nazz's coat tail.
They want him to sign the autograph.
They want him to do a gig here, do a gig there,
play the radio, play the video.
He can't make all that jazz!Like I 'splained to you he's a carpenter kitty, got his own lick.
But when he know he should go and show and blow,
and can't go cause he got too much strain on him,
straightenin' out the squares,
he sends a couple of these cats that he's hippin'.So came a little sixty-cent gig one day,
and The Nazz was in a bind,
and he put it on a couple of his boys.
He say, "Boys, take care of that for me, would ya?"And they say, "You take it off your wig, Nazz, we'll cool it."
And they started out to straighten it out for The Nazz.
And they got about half way to where they were goin'
and they came to a little old twenty-cent pool of water
and they got right in the pool of water with the boat
and all of a sudden, Blam!,
the lightnin' flashin' and the thunder roarin'
and the boat is goin' up and down
and these poor cats figured every minute gonna be their last
and one cat look up and.... here come The Nazz!Cool as anyone you see.
Right across the water.Stompin'
And there was a little cat on board, I think his name was Jude.
He say, "Hey, Nazz, can I make it out there witcha?"
And The Nazz say, "Make it, Jude!"
Old Jude went stompin' off that boat,
took four steps,
dropped his whole cart,
and the Nazz had to stash him back on board.So The Nazz say, "Say, what seem to be troublin' you boys?"
He say, "You hittin' on that S.O.S.in' bell pretty hard.
You gonna bend that bell, knockin' on it like that."One of the cats say, " 'What seems to be troublin' ya?!?!'
Can't ya see the storm's goin'
and the lightnin' flashin'
and the thunder roarin'...?"And The Nazz say, "I told you to stay cool, didn't I, babies?"
To the people who don't know what it means to believe,
to "stay cool" is to be,
to have the sweet fragrance of serenity rock ya' away.So now everybody's talkin' about The Nazz.
Oh, this beautiful, swingin' man.
How he's settin' the country on fire with great sparks of great love
like a swingin' non-stop satellite goin' through all the lands
and valleys and puttin' down the scene with such beauty
and such power and such charm
that there are now sparks seventy-five feet long shootin' out of the grapevine
and they now got five thousand of these little cats and kitties
in The Nazz's home town, where the cat live, lookin' to get straight.Well, he knows he can't straighten them there.
It's too small a place to want to hang everybody up.So The Nazz backed away a little bit
and he look at these cats and these kitties
and he say, "Come on, babies. Let's cut on out down the pike."And there went The Nazz.
And these five thousand cats and kitties are stompin' up a storm.
Behind them there's a great love river of joy.
It's goin' like a great chain through these gorgeous cats and kitties
as they're swingin' along on the beat of the Nazz
and the birds are flyin' on one side
and singin' love songs to these cats and kitties
and there's a great jubilee of love.And The Nazz talkin' about how pretty the hour, how pretty the flower,
how pretty you, how pretty me, how pretty the tree.
Nazz had them pretty eyes.
He wanted everybody to see with pretty eyes and see how pretty it was.And they're havin' such a glorious swingin' time
that before you know it they were forty-two miles out of town
and ain't nobody got the foist biscuit.So The Nazz look at them cats and kitties
and he say, "You hungry, ain't ya, babies?"And the cats say, "Yea, Nazz."
Say, "We was diggin' so hard on what you was puttin' down
we didn't pre-pare." Say, "We goofed."So The Nazz say, "Well we gotta take it easy here.
We wouldn't want to go ahead and order up something
you might not like, would we."And they said, "Sweet double hipness, you put it down and we'll pick it up."
And the Nazz step away a little bit. And he put a glorious sound of love on.
He said, "Oh, sweet swingin' flowers of the field."
And they said, "Oh, great non-stop singular song to beauty."
And he said, "Stomp upon the terra." They did.
He said, "Lift your miracle the body." The body went up.
He said, "Lift your arms." The arms went up.
He said, "Higher." They went higher.
He said, "DIG INFINITY!" And they dug it!
And when they did, Whap!, there was a flash of thunder
and they looked in one hand was a great, big, stuffed, sweet, swingin', smoked fish.And in the other a long, gone, crazy loaf
of that southern, home-made, honey-tastin', sweet bread.Why, these poor cats flipped!
The Nazz never did nothin' simple.
When He laid it,
He laid it.[Sings:] When the saints......Sweet Lord.
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