Feminism, Wimpy Men, and the State

LRC | Brad Edmonds

[Cathryn Crawford]

I respect your views; they sound as though they are well thought out and you certianly have the experience you need to tell me these things.

I'm sorry about your baby.

I suppose because I had a great relationship with my father I see this differently. I get tired of seeing fathers treated nominally; as though they are second class citizens instead of the vital link in the chain of family.

I still think that maternity and paternity leave should be equal. The first few days and weeks of life are essential for bonding. The father should be there to take part in that special time.

[Tax-chick]

The father should be there to take part in that special time

The father should be there to take part in every special time of his children's lives! (I have a good relationship with my father, too - it's his farm I'm going to, at our NEXT career move:-) - just not as much as I wish I could have.)

What really diminishes men's importance is to say that if they're home for a few weeks, and an occasional ballgame, they've "fathered." I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir here - children need as much of their fathers' time and effort as possible, not the minimum corporate American defines as "equal with women."

[Cathryn Crawford]

That's true. I agree with all you've said! What I'm trying to say is that if a mother is important during the first few weeks, so is the father, and they should be treated as such.

[Tax-chick]

Moment of self-knowledge, here! I'm just pretty selfish about "my" babies, and want to insist that I'm the most important person in their lives, no matter what. There's resentment, too, in a way: If I'm the "essential" parent when four kids have diarrhea and three are throwing up and two have spots (and we only have two bathrooms), and the cat is sick, too; then darn it, I'm the essential parent when they're born, and they eat and snooze and hum and sweat, and spew all over me, and I do two loads of laundry between midnight and 3 a.m., and the Dad says, "I didn't hear the baby last night, did he sleep the whole time?" AAARGH!

It's just a Mom thing. Maybe it's just MY thing, although I hear lots of similar philosophy from other MoMYS (mothers of many young siblings), especially when the Dads travel.

You're right on the principle, I just can't see the specific point clearly through the irrational fog :-).

[Cathryn Crawford]

LOL - I can imagine. You sound like a great mom! My parents are both foster parents.

[Tax-chick]

My parents are both foster parents.

A true sacrificial vocation. What a gift to some of the most needy children.

I've enjoyed our discussion! Have a great evening!

[Jhoffa_]

I think half of them and a large majority of the Liberal agenda is built on a carefully cultivated hatred for God himself.

You know, believe it or not.. I didn't make myself bigger, stronger, more desirable for a multitude of different occupations and unable to bear children, just so I could preen and lord it over a few nutty, feminist crackpots.

It's not my fault, God did it!

Since that's the case, it looks to me like their gripe is primarily with him..

[Cathryn Crawford]

I tend to think that they are pretty special. ;-)

Have a good evening, yourself!

[DaughterOfAnIwoJimaVet]

I just am of the (unpopular) opinion that fathers are just as vital to a child's well being as mothers.

I share your (unpopular) opinion. I just didn't know it was unpopular. It's hard for me to imagine anyone being able to argue otherwise.

[Cathryn Crawford]

Well, Scenic and I discovered tonight that some don't feel that way. We had fun!

[Centurion2000]

bump .... I think he's spot on.

[Cathryn Crawford]

I do, too. Amazing as I found this on LRC; I usually agree with very little on that site.

[DaughterOfAnIwoJimaVet]

I suppose because I had a great relationship with my father I see this differently.

This must be our common denominator, Cathryn. I had a great relationship with my dad, too; some of the most valuable things I've learned in life, I learned from him.

[Cathryn Crawford]

Perhaps it is. We had our problems; but, we managed to stay close.

[Centurion2000]

I do, too. Amazing as I found this on LRC; I usually agree with very little on that site.

Something that most women never seem to consider ... civiliation is an onion skin over human nature ... very little is required to peel it away ... see LA riots for examples.

[Dan from Michigan]

Often, it’s just the opposite – they’re aggressive and power hungry.

1/2 Disagree. They are passive. They are however power-hungry just as much as Feminazi's. They ALWAYS pack down from another guy in a straight up confrontation. They also do not hesitate to stab that person in the back or hit a women. These are the same types of guys that frequent piecenik(Spelling intentional) rallies.

The men in Congress and the judges who helped bring it about weren’t necessarily wimps. They were foolish, scheming, selfish, and short-sighted, yes; but I’m sure there were more opportunists than pushovers among them.

I think where I disagree with the author here is on the definition of wimp. Running to the hills in response of doing what is RIGHT is the epidomy of a wimp. 65% of it in the mind. Oftentimes those that are wimps physically are also wimps in the mind, but that's not always the case. these men are somehow wimps for not reversing the tide of feminism

Some are, some aren't. Those that put their head in the sand sure as hell are though. Giving up is the same as running to the hills.

and many (especially in the South) have quietly ignored the moral and philosophical wrecks that are Congress, our institutions of higher learning, and the popular press

That's backing down. Running to the hills. Head in the sand. Wimps.

Some men choose not to speak out much because they have accepted the grave responsibility of supporting a family, and for their families’ sakes they put job security ahead of ego

Why do so many people think of it as an either/or situation? Family is important. Picking the people that are supposed to represent us DIRECTLY affects families. How long does it take to write a letter to the editor? Vote? Tell others to vote for or against someone. An hour a month at a GOP meeting? Putting in even just one hour helping a good candidate. Bring the family.

What does that old saying go. You have to stand for something or you fall for anything.

[honeygrl]

" For example, I had a miscarriage last month, at 5 weeks. Having guessed I was pregnant for only three weeks, I'd already "discerned" the baby's sex, named him, planned what he would wear home from the hospital, posed for pictures, imagined the early weeks of nursing him ... my husband, although he was saddened that we wouldn't be having the baby we expected, had not experienced the "relationship" I had. "

My experience with miscarraige was a bit different. I've had 3 miscarraiges and 2 children after those. I honestly think my husband took all 3 harder than I did, especially the first one. After the first one I refused to get my hopes up until I saw a heartbeat on the ultrasound. And with the first one I was so severely sick and hospitalized due to the pregnancy that I felt that one just wasn't meant to be that time. All 3 were natural miscarraiges and before 10wks into the pregnancy. I'm sure he still wonders how it would be to have a 5 yr old now but I don't ever wonder about things like that. What I like to believe is that it took my son 4 tries to get here, rather than that I lost 3 trying to get him here. Maybe the one you lost just wasn't ready to be here quite yet.

[driftless]

An excellent assessment in my opinion. What is defined as feminism has done far more harm than good. I should stress that I mean modern anti-male gender feminists like the Steinems and Friedans not the equity feminists like the early suffragettes and the modern-day ones. The problem is that many if not most college-educated women are being brainwashed by some of the most insane gender feminist ideology. The daughters from upper-middle class and even wealthy families are more than eager to believe the argument that they are an oppressed class despite growing up in relative luxury. My fiancee's recent grad daughter is a case in point. It doesn't take long for her to talk to realize that she has a very low regard for males. Ruth Bader Ginsburg is her hero. No man is good enough for her. But she is not a bad person, in fact she is a very nice person overall. But a liberal college "education" has warped her sense of reality. She'll find out quick that the feminist paradigm of "all women good and all men bad" is a crock.

[Nightshift]

this is really good reading.

However i would like to make one point, women need that maternity time to recoperate from giving birth. My wife has done that 7 times and she needs the time off more than I do. Now if there was complications and the wife needs help at home, then yes time off should be given to the husband so he can help.

[ontos-on]

First off, tueday morning w/o much time, the author needs to defien "wimp" or what he really menas. Wimp is a piece of slang w/o precise meaning. The article suffers in its attempt to precisely who is and isnt one. It would be analogous to a concerted effort to say who is and isnt an "a_ _ hole". It is risible because when your done you are not sure what you got. The author obviously has some meaning associated with "wimp" that he employs in order to decide who is and isnt one. But he fails because he hasnt declared what he really is talking about. Eg. Does he mean coward; or opportunist; or energetic egotist. Who knows????