Man Dying of Child Support Enforcement

Mens News Daily ^ | May 30, 2003 | Roger F. Gay

[Chancellor Palpatine]

ROFLMAO - mainly at you. How truly pathetic you are, insecure, unable to relate. When was the last time you had a date, or better yet, when was the last time you talked to a girl?

I have a truckload of daughters, and I'm happy to report that you are of the species that is already on their "forbidden to date" list - which was written by me.

Its a simple list, and includes the following: introverts, ranters, right wing ideologues, left wing ideologues, junior pundits, cads, shiftless dreamers, guys without ambition, the socially inept, the athletically inept, the intellectually inept and the addicted.

Anything else is fair game.

[wimpycat]

Anything else is fair game.

You've left the field wide open. You left out convicted felons, grifters, social climbers, men with an external locus of control ("you made me hit you", "see what YOU made ME do?"),sponges, and emotional black holes.

[Chancellor Palpatine]

Hmmm - I thought those would have been covered in my list under different categories, but with same effect. I gotta say that of your group, the emotional black hole and the one with the external locus of control may have been missed by me.

[Paul C. Jesup]

Ah but you don't know me or what I look like, years from now I might end up dating one of your daughters and you would never know it.

Chew on that.

[Chancellor Palpatine]

Nah - your type is readily visible after about 2 minutes of questions. Transparent, really.

[Paul C. Jesup]

Transparent, reallyNah - your type is readily visible after about 2 minutes of questions. .

Not really, I am fairly intellegent and know what answers to give to those type of questions.

[Paul C. Jesup]

But I will be able to spot you by you views. An off-handed joke here, a slip of the tougue there. It will not be really that hard to spot you.

[wimpycat]

Not really, I am fairly intellegent and know what answers to give to those type of questions.

Oh, really? Let's test this out, in a 'sitting in the living room waiting for the daughter to go out on her date' sort of way:

So, Paul, tell us about your family. What do your parents do?

[Paul C. Jesup]

If I talked about my family here, you would be able to spot me later.

[Chancellor Palpatine]

Why would we "spot" you? Do you plan on coming around anyone's home or family?

[wimpycat]

If I talked about my family here, you would be able to spot me later.

Well, I don't have any daughters, so I'm not worried about you.

notes in file: Subject is evasive when it comes to answering personal questions and admits he might be "spotted" later, thereby blowing his "cover" as a smooth talking ladies' man.

That's it. You failed the test.

[Paul C. Jesup]

I know better than to talk about my personal life in public.

[wimpycat]

Helloooo! We're on the internet. I wasn't asking about your real family. I'm challenging your assertion that you "know what answers to give" to your dates' dads. Let's try this again: (You're losing points for assuming I really want to know about you, so you'd better make this good.)

"So, Paul, tell us about your family. What do your parents do?"

[Quilla]

This thread gets even more interesting as the days go by. I have come to one certain conclusion. If I ever answer our door expecting my daughter's gentleman caller and the fellow introduces himself as Paul C. Jesup, we're moving.

[Chancellor Palpatine]

Brrrrrrr......

[ChemistCat]

[ChemistCat]

Ping. ;-)

[wimpycat]

I hear crickets chirping.

[TankerKC]

Someone in his economic position would normally be able to raise two children in reasonably good style.

Maybe. If here weren't a two time loser and supporting three households. Still, I understand where he is coming from.

[Theophilus]

Let me offer you a little hypocritical advice: Say this to yourself over and over again: "Life and Love are not about me and what I want and what makes be happy". I say hypocritical because I have a selfish attitude all the time and nothing makes more unhappy than thinking about all the things I think I'm giving up and all the things I think I'll never get, and especially the simple things that I think I deserve but don't really need. Never be guided by your emotions, they are too fickle, that's what liberals do. Satisfaction is something you have to resolve between God and yourself, don't count on other people. The next time you catch yourself being happy, make sure you thank Almighty God. A lot of people are with you and feel the same way. But who really cares??? In 100 years or so, nobody who'll be here is even going to remember our names.