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JUDGE FINDS AMISH GUILTY!
AP Wire
| June 6, 2002
| DAN LEWERENZ
Posted on 06/06/2002 1:29:17 PM PDT by NYer
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To: A.J.Armitage
I didn't know they had beards but no moustaches, let alone why. But now I've begun my journey of knowledge, so why not tell me why? Because when the Amish started out a few hundred years ago in Germany, moustaches were associated with the military. Since the Amish beliefs told them to avoid the military profession they also avoided the moustaches. That is why there are no Amish with moustaches.
41
posted on
06/06/2002 2:43:15 PM PDT
by
PJ-Comix
To: A.J.Armitage
See #28
42
posted on
06/06/2002 2:43:49 PM PDT
by
ez2muz
To: Mr. Lucky
In humor, as in music, it's tough to beat the classics. Amish Paradise
by "Weird" Al Yankovic
Tune: Gangsta's Paradise by Coolio
Lyrics:
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
I've churned butter once or twice
Living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Living in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies all I agree I look good in black... fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired
There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
Not a single luxury
Like Robinson Caruso
It's as primitave as can be
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice
Living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice
Living in an Amish paradise
Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
Think you're really rightous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might just have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights
Living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Living in an Amish paradise
43
posted on
06/06/2002 2:45:01 PM PDT
by
Alouette
To: AmishDude
town of Blue Ball
There is such a place, BTW.
Must not be close to "Intercourse, PA" then. LOL
44
posted on
06/06/2002 2:46:31 PM PDT
by
Danielle
To: Prodigal Daughter
Amish are in the Midwestern rural areas of a lot of states. Northeast Indiana has a big concration of Amish. Also East-Central Ohio. The strangest thing is when I ran across some Amish while visiting South Carolina. Somehow I couldn't get used to Amish alternately speaking with thick southern accents and then switching to their German dialect.
45
posted on
06/06/2002 2:46:48 PM PDT
by
PJ-Comix
To: Danielle
Blue Ball is not far from Intercourse, but Bird-in-Hand is in-between the two.
To: AmishDude
Blue Ball sounds like a place where Tom Green would fit right in........
47
posted on
06/06/2002 2:50:52 PM PDT
by
cmsgop
To: Alouette
To: Prodigal Daughter
A lot of what looks like Amish are actually Mennonites. Mennonites are similar to Amish but they can drive cars and wear regular clothes. For a long time, Mennonites were happy to wear regular clothes but then they noticed a strange thing. Tourists wanted to see their Amish neighbors dressed in the simple clothes. Since tourism is good for the local economy, a lot of Mennonites started wearing Amish clothes again and passed themselves off as Amish. It was sort of like Disneyworld where they have people dressed up as Mickey or Donald. In the case of the Mennonites, they put on Amish costurmes. A good rule of thumb I learned in Shipshewana is that is the Amish person you are talking to is wearing a beeper on the belt (as an "Amish" waitress serving me some food was doing), then it is good bet it is really a Mennonite in disguise.
49
posted on
06/06/2002 2:53:23 PM PDT
by
PJ-Comix
To: AmishDude
The Electric Amish Do they do bar mitzvahs?
50
posted on
06/06/2002 3:01:38 PM PDT
by
Alouette
To: NYer
When I took driver's ed I was taught horses have right of way. Has that changed ?
To: Alouette
If you want a funny movie, rent "For Richer, For Poorer" which is a film about how two hedonistic yuppies (Tim Allen, Kirstie Alley) hide out in Amish country while evading the IRS.
Extremely funny stuff.
52
posted on
06/06/2002 4:23:56 PM PDT
by
Orion
To: BossLady
.just leave these people be.... Yep
53
posted on
06/06/2002 5:02:25 PM PDT
by
watcher1
To: PJ-Comix
That's interesting: your #49. I'm sure these people were Amish. I went back to visit them maybe 7 years ago and like an idiot, I asked them if I could take their picture. (They don't believe in photography.).
This thread is incomplete. It needs some Amish recipes.
To: Amish Dude
Clinton appointees agree that
this man's a spiritual example for us all...
Unclear on the Concept
In May, Scripps Howard News Service profiled former lawyer James Kelley of Washington, D.C., one of a small group at his local church who are enthusiastic Episcopalians but who do not believe in God. Said Kelley, "We all love the incense, the stained glass windows, the organ music, the vestments, and all of that. It's drama. It's aesthetics. It's the ritual. That's neat stuff. I don't want to give all that up, just because I don't believe in God."
Weird News, 1997
To: NYer
If the Amish do not want to be protected by big brother then they should be left alone. I am rooting for the Amish. Leave them alone, if they lose this one then next they will be forcing them to buy cell phones so that they can be in constant communication with the traffic safety commission in the Hague. Why do people worry about these people? Leave them alone.
To: NYer
Comment #58 Removed by Moderator
To: tracer
Triangulation............sounds like bubba is behind this.
To: dfrussell
However, if they want to run their buggies on the public roads, they are subject to the same laws as the rest of us. If I am not mistaken, Pennsylvania law states that motor vehicles are to yield right of way to horse drawn buggies and that the operators have to conceal the vehicle off th roads with whatever means necessary so as to not spook the horses.
---max
60
posted on
06/06/2002 7:42:10 PM PDT
by
max61
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