White Guys Need Not Apply (vanity)

University of Phoenix | 10/31/2001 | subterfuge

[Jay W]

Unless you're being MADE to take this course by an employer, by a college requirement for graduation, or by a court order or the like, why the dickens are you even in that class? Those classes do not teach truth. Instead, they revel in lies.

Here are your choices:

1. Sit back, say nothing, nod when the other students nod, repeat back to the teacher what the teacher wants to hear, get your "C" (for being a white guy, who can't possibly get an "A"), and basically shut up, and put in your time until the sentence is completed. Or...

2. Go for broke. If you're in that class on your own volition, what the hell do you have to lose by speaking up? Challenge every point. If they call Secretary Powell a token, ask them if they think all other Secretaries of States are tokens. Ask them if they'd dare ever say that to Mr. Powell's face.

Tell them about Slavery in Africa. Tell them about the torture engaged in by the Aztecs, who had the most brutal empire ever in the Americas. Speak the truth to the class. But be prepared for all manner of accusations. When the accusations fly, defend yourself.

[gore_sux]

What about Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, Oprah Winfrey, and Bill Cosby?

[MississippiMan]

My first line of defense in this class would be to draw up a detailed list of the achievements of Powell and Rice to demonstrate that they are anything but tokens. Hammer the MERIT WINS argument when common sense is used. There are things I disagree with Powell and Rice on, but there is no doubt that both are very accomplished people and you should be able to find plenty of ammo in their backgrounds for such a presentation.

MM

[WhiteGuy]

Yeah I'm a white guy

I just thought I'd see if I SEEMED like a white guy...

just so everyone knows, and to prove I'm proud...

I'm a white guy, I like girls, I eat alot of meat and junk food

I drink, smoke, and enjoy lots of non-PC stuff

and

I have a sense of humor

White male and proud of it

White male and proud of it

White male and proud of it

White male and proud of it

[eFudd]

If I was to give a presentation it would be along the lines of

1. Defining racism. Racism = treating anyone better or worse because of their race.

2. How affirmative action is state sponsored racism.

3. How the word diversity is be used to replace the phrase affirmative action since affirmative action took some PR hits with some reverse discrimnation suits.

4. How diversity, as practiced in America, is replete with racism. Everytime a person talks about including a race or races, they are being racist. See #1 above.

5. How anyone that claims to be a hyphenated American is a racist and is attempting to practice aparthied.

That certainly should liven up the class.

[Gatún(CraigIsaMangoTreeLawyer)]

Sorry for the late reply.

I'd love to drop the class but its a requirement.

Okay, go at it with all barrels blazing. Give them hell.

I’m bicultural and know how the Latin mind works. Having said that, you might want to look into why your Latin classmates are in college in the United States. On whose Money? If it is on their parents money, they are well off. If it is on scholarships, how did they get it? Influence?

Point is, if your classmates are so put upon and so unequal, they wouldn’t be able to afford studies in the U.S. Because they are studying in the U.S., they are more equal than others in their own country and more equal than those in the U.S. who can’t afford college. He dicho!

[constable tom]

It's only one more name, but he is CEO of a major US corporation: Kenneth Chenault of American Express. You could search for others. Blacks in leadership positions of major corporations may impress some of them more than government appointees, for instance. Nobody hires a token CEO, at least not for a major corporation (or if they're no good, the board will can them ASAP).

[occam's chainsaw]

Here's something else for you to try...whenever the topic of affirmative action comes up and the class starts defending it, wait till all of the defense has presented their case then ask why affirmative action is nonexistent in professional sports. Throw their own arguments back at them and call them on every contradiction until they get so frustrated they begin cussing and screaming in an illogical rage that exposes their racist hypocrisy.

That's always good for a laugh.

[packrat01]

Just a thought, in the interest of diversity:

Ask one of the other students if the two of you could "swap" presentations. In the reading, agree to substitute blatt for any reference to gender or race.

It might surprise some of them to hear the tripe they're spewing.

Might be better, to have a third party (objectively) read both of them.

Best case, is if the other students couldn't tell the two apart.

[BlueCat]

I'm taking the course because its a requirment for this management degree.

That our institutions would put this on the curriculum and call it an accredited course is beyond my comprehension. It is pathetic, actually, and as a WHITE man, you should do something about this. And you can, because WHITE MEN control everything, you know.

[subterfuge]

I choose #2 and I'm already letting them have it. I've got thick enough skin and broad enough shoulders to take the abuse. Besides that I'm married so I've been through a few battles. Thats a joke folks.

[subterfuge]

as a WHITE man, you should do something about this. And you can, because WHITE MEN control everything, you know.

Hey thats right, why didn't I think of that. Must be my defective racist brain.

[BlueCat]

Must be my defective racist brain.

That's no excuse. You, as a WHITE MAN, should feel that control of the universe in your bones. There is no need to think about it.

[Big Bunyip]

I had to go through one of these a few years ago, found it equally repulsive and, after 30 minutes or so, simply set out to disrupt the class -- but in the nicest possible way.

I'm a big guy so I stood up and, keeping a straight face, said I'd been discriminated against because I was never allowed to become a jockey! This was clearly "sizism," I replied when the moderator (or facilitator) asked if I was serious. Races should be handicapped so that horses finishing last could still "win" if they had to carry 240-pounders like me. At one stage, inspired, I cried from the heart: "Biology Is Not Destiny! Repeat after me, "Biology Is Not Destiny!"

The moderator never quite managed to fully regain control of the session after that -- and I made sure the jockey routine kept coming up again and again. ("But I don't understand. Wouldn't fat jockeys be a sort of affirmative action program, you know, like how they've lowered standards in the military for women, which we all know is a great and empowering thing?" etc etc etc)

By this stage, my buddy launched into how he was discriminated against whenever he bought a subway token with a $20 bill and they gave him nothing but singles for change. When he was told this was ridiculous, he told a cock and bull take of lurking by the change window to see if anybody but Chinese men were given fists full of singles, and how the Transit Authority was under a moral obligation to hire more chinese guys as token clerks. Well, that got the blacks going about Chinese kids got preference in the best high schools, with one actually saying their should be limits on the number of "smart oriental kids."

I tell you, it was priceless. He and I had a great time playing victim -- and so can you. Just keep a straight face while saying the most ridiculous things and always assure the moderator you are serious. Think of it as politically correct ju-jitsu, where you use the weigh of your opponent's arguments against them.

It's fun, anybody can do it -- and if you employer wants to waste his money on these sessions, it's your duty as a good worker to help him.

[Lysander]

You mean they want drugs legalized. Light 'em if you got 'em.

I don't smoke. Yes drug legalization would go a long way to end the power of the liberals to ruin our society with drug laws that do more harm than good. Are you a liberal? You are on the wrong forum if so.

[Gatún(CraigIsaMangoTreeLawyer)]

Thank you for sharing that story. I laughed and laughted!!!

[Don Myers]

"Are you a liberal? "

Yeah, sure. I voted for Bill Clinton, and I will vote for Hillary when she runs for president.

[subterfuge]

thats a riot BB. I have got to do something before its over. I'm already into the disruption part but I just need to be a little more creative.

[machman]

Check out this guy, yup, people from South America can't get anywhere in US corporations today.

J. Pedro Reinhard EVP and CFO, Dow Chemical.

Also, the Treasuer, Fernado Ruiz, is from Ecuador.

[Landru]

This "is" a no-brainer, sub...here's how you can shut 'em up right here & now.

You said you were able to identify the ethnic origins of many in this class, right?
So for the sake of discussion?
Let us say we're talking about 5 Mexicans, 4 Columbians, 7 Brazilians, 9 orientals and African nations represented by 3 others.

Now...goto the Internet & lookup these countries; one by one via a search engine.
Find out & record who the politicians representing these nations are...from the leader on down as far as the info will go short of Dog Catcher.
Record the names & positions under each specific nation, & then?

Go to class & read it aloud nation by nation.

When you're finished?
Ask your entire diversity class, specifically the peoples representative of these nations on your list, "Exactly where are the european(s)and/or Americans represented in THEIR nation's governing bodies; be them male OR female??"

If this goes as I'm thinking?
You'll at first be met with a stunned silence; so get your statement(s) in quick because then at some point, you're gonna be getting some serious PC-Grade pious *Righteous Rage* for having had the unmitigated GALL of even be asking such questions to begin with. (that's the Liberal technique known as, obvuscation, btw)

You see?
You'll have effectively called these people's bets, answered their question by asking a question which requires they defend themselves, their nationalistic/racist behaviors. Yesssss!!
Insodoing, you'll clearly illustrate the hypocracy of their position & well, learning *can* hurt, eh? :o)

Once the rage starts flying you need not say another word; merely flash 'em all a sweet, wry little smile.
For the game, set & match will belong to you lock, stock & barrel.

There won't be a damned one of 'em who won't be smarting because of your comsummate win, too. {hehehe}
Just don't be looking for 'em to admit anything.

America...ain't she great.