Not only is Trump responsible for Covid deaths, Trump causes global warming, infanticide, glacial formation, the sinking of the Titanic, the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, and fire ants. Trump is the cause of late mail, lack of adequate punctuation, the heartbreak of psoriasis, and feminine itching. Trump is the cause of fixed greyhound races, the metric system, errors in longitudinal measurements, and smaller portions. Trump is the cause of angry wives, Speedos on fat people, mismatched socks, and mold on cucumbers. Trump is the cause of the Zombie Apocalypse, interstellar planetary collisions, muteness in albinos, and killer bees. Trump is the cause of gingivitis, off-key chorus singing, air inversions, and incremental floods. Trump is the cause of fans that quit, entropy, soap shards in the shower, and fat girls. Trump is the cause of cold oatmeal, excessive blogging, sweat stains, and misfires in 9mm ammunition. Trump is the cause of cabinet doors that do not line up, cracks in the sidewalk, the scourge of heroin, and every plane crash since 1972. Trump is the cause of John McCain, senility, traitorism, and infiltration by the left (but I repeat myself). Trump is the cause of low toner, high transmission rates, delivery service price increases, and gaudy shirts. Trump is the cause of splinters, earth tremors, Gamma ray emission by the element Lawrencium, and the lack of hobbits in real life. Trump is the cause of Facebook monitoring, trigger happy SWAT teams, pencil-neck geeks, and the Yellowstone Caldera. Trump is the cause of Russia, France, Sweden, and Zambia. Trump is the cause of carbon buildup, broken bungee cords, bad lap dances, and a lack of friendly greetings in cities. Trump is the cause of paper cuts, whirlpools, thunder, and machine disconnects. Trump is the cause of honey badgers, rigidity, painful exercise, and linear contraction. Trump is the cause of Nancy Pelosi, botox overdoses, pure insanity, and Alzheimers (but I repeat myself). Trump is the cause of regression analysis, micro-stamping, failed unions, and misaligned microwave towers. Trump is the cause of blurry lenses, spider bites, stains, and legless crocodiles. Trump is the cause of missing keyboard keys, unexpected phone calls, broken pottery, and squeaking doors. Trump is the cause of warning labels on appliances, erectile dysfunction, waterspouts, and potholes. Trump is the cause of canker sores, narcissistic Presidents, leaking toilets, and crack addiction. Trump is the cause of corroded pennies, locomotive derailments, internet trolls, and wardrobe failures. Trump is the cause of ADHD in the clergy, Blue Screens of Death on personal computers, the French Revolution of 1789, and thorns. Trump is the cause of bad Muppet shows, holes in circus nets, the NFL going all-queer, all-the-time, and Sandra Fluke's birth-control deficit. Trump is the cause of Israel's problems with Syria, excessive salt in the Pacific Ocean, the disappearance of Malaysian Air flight 370, and infomercials. Trump is the cause of low-calorie diet soda, smudges on the Xerox, dry technical text, and animal abuse. Trump is the cause of glass shards, bad pudding, hair cancer, and sun-dried dead worms. Trump is the cause of porcelin stains, droughts, turbulence above 10000 feet, and power brown-outs. Trump is the cause of low scores on Angry Birds, weak tea, Michael Jackson's early demise, and Micheal Jackson. Trump is the cause of bad combovers, Chris Matthews, alcoholism, and spittle (but I repeat myself). Trump is the cause of the Koch Brothers, micturition syncope, solar eclipses, and dead lithium batteries. Trump is the cause of Quiznos spongmonkeys, badly behaved Colonels, Boris Badenov, and the shipwreck of the Minnow. Trump is the cause of failed sitcoms, knots you cannot get undone, overly-rare hamburgers at restaurants, and Miley Cyrus. Trump is the cause of squeaking hinges, malformed carrots, bent coathangers, and slippery decks. Trump is the cause of the 2014 Midterms, tarnished silver, wobbling fans, and tangled power cables. Trump is the cause of off-hook phones, shattered ceramics, dull scissors, and dogeared books.
Hope that helps heaps.
Love,
Laz