Posted on 07/24/2016 8:04:18 AM PDT by Lazamataz
Actually, this is a particular phrase where I would invoke Author's Privilege. I like this phrase. It has cadence. Goes/Guns. I feel it is one of the standout phrases. If you were the editor and I was the website author, I'd overrule you on this one, or attempt to. :)
Okay. It does have alliteration.
Fine, but am I *sexy*?
And now I’m going to the pool.
I’m the wrong person to ask about that.
In retrospect, you are right. I need to structure up sentence my tighten.
Proper answer: “If one considers intelligence a turn on, sure.”
I can give you some smooth-lessons in exchange for your grammar and composition help. :)
PS: I joke around a lot, but I sincerely appreciate your no-holds-barred honest assessments. It surely shall improve me, as an author.
P1 Dylann Roof (may his name be obliterated from all history) (not Dillon Root) (Dillon Root played football for Fresno State.)
P2 whose anger (not who's anger); compliant . . . (not complaint) press
P3 sequence . . . has become (not have); nature . . . ID . . . discovery . . . have (not has)
P4 NYT . . . fall (not fell) firmly; gun-ban camp (hyphenated adjective); Better: NYT . . . they unsurprisingly are firmly (they were never pro-2A; no event or rhetoric pushed them off a perch to fall into a camp of different opinion)
P5 motives (not inspirations; motive implies criminality; inspiration implies virtue); . . . blames guns (not goes to guns)
P6 without mentioning the murderers' motives (not "with no mention to the motivations"; call murder out for what it is)
P8 completely illegally (not "in a completely illegal fashion")
P10 Einstein famously defined insanity as repeating (not doing) the same experiment but expecting different results. (Other, clinical definitions exist.) The Lab is on a mission to expunge "do" the lamest, laziest, least descriptive transitive verb from English.
P11 repeatedly (not over and over)
Separately, your nick spelled backward is zatamazal = Zat A. Mazal ~ Crude, incorrect, but effective Yiddish for Oy! My bad luck!
Please add me to your ping list, but not yet to your Rage Monkey ping list. Our deep rage reservoir is forming a meniscus here.
YOU GUYS ROCK
Before I take editorials public, out to the conservative media, I intend to vet them here....
So people — PEOPLE LIKE YOU — who know far more about proper English than I do, can review them.
THANK YOU BOTH
“Band guns”
“I remember this one time in Band Camp....”
Somehow we must find the strength to stop guns from banding together and killing people. The first step is to pass a new law forbidding more than two guns in one place at one time. Don’t talk to me about the right to assemble peacefully, when have guns ever assembled for peaceful purposes? I tell you these gun bands must not be allowed to roam all over this country wreaking havoc and reeking of Haddock. Next thing you know they will get together with the Roses and we’ll all be Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door or somewhere much worse. No American should be shot dead while smelling a rose. Vote for George Clinton to stop gun band violence.
Glad to help.
bkmk
You’re always welcome to my advice, which you are free to take or leave. Also, you’re much more fun than most people.
I take a lot of your suggestions. I shall rewrite and repost on this thread for further suggestions...
“The GG’s are nothing if not persistent, and that is exactly what we need. Every week we should have pro 2A representatives/senators introducing pro gun legislation.”
I concur. Anyone representing conservatives should not only be “busy defending our rights”, they should get busy RESTORING our rights.
“Gun control” is just a dog whistle. It makes the right people jump the right way at suitable times. Notice that the Left never actually does anything about it when they can; ever since the federal AWB fiasco, it’s only brought up to rally the troops and demonize the opposition.
They don’t want gun control.
They want votes.
That’s a great idea! Two votes for the price of one, so to speak.
One of the things I’ve been wanting to do is go to a shooting range. It seems like it would be a lot of fun.
You do not suck!
This was a very insightful editorial that you should submit, with TC’s edits, to USA Today or some other mass market outlet...it needs to be seen, because it is absolutely true.
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