Posted on 03/20/2011 1:48:21 PM PDT by OldDeckHand
I was bullied and harassed during much of my school life. My parents told me that as a good Christian, I had to ignore those who tormented me and alway turn the other cheek. It didn’t help.
Then, one day, I turned around and popped a kid square in the jaw.
He dropped like a sack of potatoes and I never had any problems again.
I admit I can’t. I wouldn’t want to be pres even if I could.
I was born in the Canal Zone and not the US of A...or Kenya.
“...It sounds as if I disappointed you...”
-
Not at all, it makes me hot!
LOL!!!
Thank you!!!
Just because someone didn't move around doesn't mean they have roots. You're better off being sociable and traveled than the alienated and trapped.
You could be me describing my life. I’ve moved 38 times, lived in 8 states, and traveled all over this big country. I had never lived long enough in one place to know what “community” was. I longed to have “close” friends, but was afraid to have them because it hurt so bad to leave them. I learned to appreciate whatever the Lord brought me to and to make the best out of it. Ironically, now in my old age, I’ve lived in the same place for 18 years and have actually seen other people’s children grow up and have children of their own. It’s a strange feeling. I sort of feel like I ought to be “going” some place. LOL. Seriously, I feel blessed to finally have a “community”.
I was beat up almost every day of highschool, because I refused to smoke and drink with the cool kids, and because I am a christian, they would form a circle around me and take turns pushing me into each other and punching. Of course it goes without saying I’d be hitting back, but inevitably I’d go down.
I got bigger, and then I’d hunt for the bullies, I was beat up for no other reason than it made them feel cool. I’m a tall good looking guy with no speech impediment. Girls liked me, but refused to date me because of the social standing. These people need no reason to bully. The only thing they understand is force, and I gave it out in spades my senior years. Heck, I would hunt for the bullies picking on other kids and I would intervene.
This is pretty much my life story, and even today (35) after 10 years of army and 3 tours, I will not tolerate the stronger picking on those they perceive to be weaker or different than them. This goes on a world scale too.
I turned the other cheek but I never blew my cork. Now in middle age, I look and see what a grave mistake that was. If you don't fight back, a dangerous and self-destructive passivity becomes the dominating pattern of your life.
You may fight for others or abstract principles but not for you. You've been conditioned. It's the treatment you deserve. However, the adult world "dishes it out" even more than the child's. Eventually the passivity interferes with all aspects of your life: education, relationships, career.
Accolades mean nothing, there's no sense of accomplishment, you engage in a protective social retreat. A measure of paranoia may creep in that anything you might achieve will be taken from you so why bother trying? Talents go to waste. Productivity is lost.
We need to teach the right of self-defense which will ensure self-respect and enforce respect from others.
At this point in my life, I wouldn’t trade, as there is too much about my life I wouldn’t risk giving up.
At this point in my life, I wouldn’t trade, as there is too much about my life I wouldn’t risk giving up.
Yep, and this has been going on for some time.
In 1986, when my son was in 8th grade at public school, there was a kid who kept taking his lunch and flushing it down the toilet. He didn't want the food or anything. Just wanted to torment my son (who has always been quiet and thoughtful).
As you can imagine, my son was very reluctant to talk about it, but my wife and I detected something was not right at school. He finally told us the story and I immediately confronted the school principal.
Her (don't even get me started about that) answer to the problem ...this will equip your son to deal with life.
I pulled him out of the school the following week and put him in a private school where he flourished.
He now has his MBA in clinical psychology, and works helping troubled young people (late teens - early twenties) overcome adversity and prepare for careers.
Taking him out of public school was the BEST decision we could possibly have made. I watch the shenanigans in Wisconsin and I'm reminded that the days of sacrificing teachers is, for all intents and purposes, a thing of the past.
We did live quite awhile in a few places since I’ve been an adult, but still have moved quite a bit. On the other hand, I have 4 different high schools I keep track of on Facebook (and have friends and look at reunion photos for each) and it’s fun. So, I probably have a wider group of friends than the average person. I once counted up. I went to school in 11 different school systems (I’m not counting different schools, like Jr high or high schools within the same system as different of course). 4 different high schools. But I felt very fortunate to go my last 2 years in the same place. It was where my husband also graduated, so that place has always felt the most like *home* to me.
The second is that Casey was in the 10th grade, and the bully in the 7th. That suggests Casey actually was small for his age -- the other kids all seem to loom over him. And also, how bad must it have been for him that kids 3 years younger thought it was okay to make him a target.
Only thing he did wrong was not kick him a few times once he was on the ground.
I disagree. I think what he did was appropriate. He stood up for himself, defended himself. He didn’t to become the sort of person his tormentor was. I can respect that. Had he done more I would have understood, because there was bound to be some pent up anger, but I can so much more respect restraint in a person, especially a child, who has anger but does what is needed and moves on. He will make a heck of a man some day, I bet.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.