Posted on 01/20/2009 6:53:07 AM PST by PJ-Comix
Fade in; cue pseudo-soulful electric piano dirge]
Courtney Cox and her husband, what's-his-name: I pledge.
Demi Moore: I pledge.
Cameron Diaz: Me pledge too!!
Courtney Cox: To end hunger in America.
Mr. Courtney Cox: By ordering smaller endive portions from craft services.
Some guy with baseball cap that I guess I'm supposed to know: I pledge.
Stringy-haired Manson girl with creepy gray eyes: I pledge.
Demi Moore: Too-ooo-oo smile more.
(snip)
Come on, I'm really supposed to know this guy? Really?: to go to RaisingServiceAwarenessForTheVoicelessChildren.com.
Okay, I'm going to take a wild stab and say it's that chubby Korean guy from Mad TV: To find a service project that I'm just as passionate about as the mousse product for my faux-hawk.
Totally-wasted-on-heroin guy from the Red Hot Chili Peppers: I... uhhh.... ihhh... ahhhh... monkey funky like da junky...
Jason Bateman: I plehhhhdge... to fondle this microphone in a whimsically provocative manner.
(Exerpt)
Also link to Big Hollywood Essay entitled.."I Pledge to Ridicule Celebrities Who Refuse to Recognize We Are At War With People Who Want to Kill Them, Too"
Right. FOUNTAINHEAD was on this morning also. It’s Patrician Neal day, I believe, but an interesting lineup...
Demi Moore?/ Didnt she used to be in the movies?
My Oath:
I refuses to drink the Kool-Aid and join the cult of Obama!
Scary stuff.
“Your body belongs to the State. Your body belongs to the Fuhrer. Health is not a private matter. (Demi Moores breasts belong to Dow Corning. Ashton Kutcher will use his acting to make the world a better place.)”
——Nazi Socialist Party Slogan 1938. I added the parenthetical stupidity in 2009 for effect.
Cameron Diaz, Hayden Panetierre, Laura Linney, Dakota Fanning, Jaime Pressley, Ashlee Simpson, Nicole Richie, Ashton Kutcher, Tobey Maguire, Diddy, Alyssa Milano, Marisa Tomei, Courteney Cox Arquette and David Arquette, Eva Mendes, Eva Longoria, Demi Moore, Molly Sims, Kevin Connolly, Jason Bateman, Lucy Liu, Anthony Kiedis, Marisa Tomei, Aaron Ekhart, Will.I.Am and others
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