A squeamish cook's guide to haggis - 250th anniversary of the birth of Robert Burns

The Times ^ | 1/16/2008 | Claire Bowman

[svcw]

I went to a Haggis Ceremony this last summer. Very formal. All the proper tartins were worn, the Haggis brought in on a silver platter.
Every one was given the smoothest scotch I ever had (about 2oz) you where supposed to slam it down then eat the Haggis.
When I tasted the Haggis I knew why they gave you the scotch first.

[JRandomFreeper]

Goat lungs will work if you can't get sheep lungs. And I use rice instead of oatmeal (bad memories from my first enlistment).

Haggis is a wonderful thing. The tex-mex fusion I make is pretty darn good, too.

/johnny

[JRandomFreeper]

Happy Birthday. A ping to the Haggis thread was all I could afford.

/johnny

[skinkinthegrass]

...wasn’t there a Monty Python Skit on this “Glorious” dish / meal...

[Dr.Zoidberg]

“God created Haggis to train the faithful.”

One cannot go against the word of God.

[aShepard]

There is nothing more distasteful than haggis.
What civilization ever concocted this abomination?

[usmcobra]

I swear haggis was invent by two scots on a dare to see which one could come up with the most bizarre thing to eat.

Black pudding as I understand it came in second....

[dighton]

“My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.”

[jws3sticks]

The very best part of Haggis is the "sauce" and "the company" when eating it. Being 75% Scotch and 25% Dutch Gin, I am a Haggis boy form the hills.

Picture a Scots lad at his Pub for a late night, Darks and Haggis, for sure.

He climbs the trail to his sheep herders cabin for the night but does not make it and naps on the side of the trail.

In the morning, two young Lasies walk by and see the herder sleeping at the side of the trail. They decide to check hout his "Manhood" under his kilt and do, with one of them taking a blue ribbon from her hair and tieing it on his member.

He wakes, stands to relieve himself and sees the ribbon.

His words are, with a Scottish burr I can't type say:

Laddie, I don't know where were you've been or what you did, but I am Proud You Took First Place.

Have a good evening.

[yarddog]

My ancestors going back to Great, Greats is almost 100% Scottish, with one Irish girl in their somewhere. Despite that, the idea of eating Haggis makes me weak in the knees.

Of course my own Father used to love Hog’s head cheese, chitlins and baked Possum.

[JRandomFreeper]

I get the feeling that I'm in the minority here, applauding the Scots answer to charcutrie.

/johnny

[sig226]

I prefer the poetry of Montgomery Burns.

"Smithers, release the hounds."

He doesn't even need a metaphor. Brilliant.

[JRandomFreeper]

Correctly prepared, stuffed, rolled and tied, slightly chilled baked possum is a wonderfully flavorful, gelatinous slice of heaven.

Like a ballentine, without the chicken fat.

Can't stand the stuff warm, way too greasy....

/johnny

[JustaDumbBlonde]

I cook deer hearts and livers for my old dog. She loves them. I can’t imagine that I would get that hungry.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

I’ll not be squeamish o’er ye’r Haggis so long as ye dinna forget the ‘neeps and tatties!

[jacquej]

I vaguely remember eating “scrapple” as a wee girl, and finding it quite tasty.

Should I go get some counseling?

[JRandomFreeper]

No counseling required. Just stop by the next 4-star restaurant you pass, have a fois-gras on brioche appetizer, and the RIGHT wine with it (not the one the waitron is trying to push).

It is good eats.

/johnny

[SAJ]

''Tartins''?? You wee stupid bugger.

As if any true Scotsman would waste good whiskey after a dish of haggis. Or waste good whiskey at all.

[MarkeyD]

I went to one of those on Robert Burns day in England in 1996. I liked the Haggis, but then, I like everything.