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'Devil wives' getting a bad rap--many husbands think they are the cat's meow
asahi.com ^ | 01/14/2006 | haruko ishii, The Asahi Shimbun

Posted on 01/15/2006 4:55:00 AM PST by Excuse_My_Bellicosity

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To: phantomworker
I personally prefer to be attracted to and in love with my significant other.

I hesitate to join this smoldering flame-fest, but...

Your comment reflects the typical idea these days, but it seems like a recipe for divorce to me. What do you do when your significant other gets fat? Or bald? Or wrinkly? Physical attraction is temporary. If that's what keeps your significant other with you, then you can expect him to upgrade eventually (if he can afford to).

Nobody on this thread has mentioned arranged marriages yet, but they're solid evidence that impulse-pairings are not the only way to go.

261 posted on 01/15/2006 2:52:18 PM PST by Shalom Israel (Pray for the peace of Jerusalem.)
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To: LoudRepublicangirl

So you are all against interracial dating??? hmmmm...just couldn't see how some white women could find a big black guy like Denzel Washington, Clarence Thomas, Seal etc....flat, wide noses, burr headed etc ....yukkkk

ohhh....let's start the crawdaddin'......Who could ever like a little asian women..., lithe figure,flat faces , yellow skin and slanty eyes...yukkkkk.....

That's it...people only date or have any relations with people that look just like themselves....let's narrow the options for everyone!!!


262 posted on 01/15/2006 2:52:19 PM PST by chasio649
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To: Allegra; Dashing Dasher; PaulaB; peacebaby
Not to pop any bubbles but I'm married to a Philippino wife.As for being giggly and all that BS.......
On one of our first dates she took me down with a leg sweep. It's a long story and if you want to hear it hear let me know.

Of course we weren't a mail order bride get together either. We knew each other almost three years, and dated for 2, before we were married. (I lived in the Philippines 5 1/2 years)

It ain't the country, it's the woman.

263 posted on 01/15/2006 2:59:39 PM PST by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
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To: chasio649; LoudRepublicangirl
So you are all against interracial dating???

Where did she say that? I must have missed it.

264 posted on 01/15/2006 3:00:21 PM PST by Shalom Israel (Pray for the peace of Jerusalem.)
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To: Shalom Israel

No...my point is....that if someone came on this thread and couldn't understand why a white woman would be attracted to a black guy...there would be folks come out of the woodwork and call them on it...that's all.


265 posted on 01/15/2006 3:02:40 PM PST by chasio649
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To: chasio649

Personally...I don't care if people have a preference or don't give a hoot....but i never would question what someone thinks may be appealing or not appealing....who cares?


266 posted on 01/15/2006 3:05:01 PM PST by chasio649
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To: chasio649; dsc
You don't fry eggs or bacon naked do you?????

I do..........but I use a splatter guard. ;^)

267 posted on 01/15/2006 3:05:23 PM PST by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
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To: chasio649

Ah, gotcha. Fair point.


268 posted on 01/15/2006 3:05:46 PM PST by Shalom Israel (Pray for the peace of Jerusalem.)
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To: Drew68
I'll probably have to hire an attorney because Navy legal is worthless when it comes to this.

That's your best bet, Drew.

269 posted on 01/15/2006 3:13:22 PM PST by Just another Joe (Warning: FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
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To: Conservative Goddess

With all due respect, I don't think that is the fix for the ladies profiled in this book.


270 posted on 01/15/2006 3:21:56 PM PST by gogeo
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To: Shalom Israel; phantomworker
Your comment reflects the typical idea these days, but it seems like a recipe for divorce to me. What do you do when your significant other gets fat? Or bald? Or wrinkly? Physical attraction is temporary. If that's what keeps your significant other with you, then you can expect him to upgrade eventually (if he can afford to).

How did you get physical attraction exclusively out of phantomworker's comment: I personally prefer to be attracted to and in love with my significant other.???

If you LOVE someone and their physical appearance fades with age (as it does for all of us unless we go the fakey plastic surgery route) you can still be ATTRACTED to them.

271 posted on 01/15/2006 3:25:19 PM PST by arasina (So there.)
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To: dsc

Somehow, I suspect there are all kinds of women Freepers who didn't notice that at all.


272 posted on 01/15/2006 3:27:38 PM PST by gogeo
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To: Fawn
So you went to japan and shopped for a bride? Do you dislike american woman? Why did you purposely go looking in a nother country? Are your wives alot younger than you?

Because he heard it would really P!ss you off...didn't your mamma teach you to ask politely?

273 posted on 01/15/2006 3:31:34 PM PST by gogeo
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To: arasina
How did you get physical attraction exclusively out of phantomworker's comment: I personally prefer to be attracted to and in love with my significant other.???

Um, what does "attracted to" generally mean? Oh, that's right--physical attraction. And what about "in love with"? That phrase isn't at all ambiguous, and it doesn't refer to a deep and selfless devotion. For example, the phrase can never be used to describe one's love for one's children, parents or fellow man.

The originator of the comment can set me straight, of course, but the only reasonable interpretation of "attracted to and in love with" is that it refers to physical attraction and romantic love. Both of which are temporary.

274 posted on 01/15/2006 3:32:19 PM PST by Shalom Israel (Pray for the peace of Jerusalem.)
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To: Shalom Israel

I don't see it as a flame-fest in any way, do you?

So you are in favor of arranged marriages?

Impulse-pairing is an interesting way to put it. But I think what we were talking about was the talking and agreeing before the marriage. Maybe that is why arranged marriages do work, although I have never known any personally. I just always thought there should be love and respect in a marriage. Attraction is often the first step toward building love, imho.


275 posted on 01/15/2006 3:39:25 PM PST by phantomworker (Winning is important but the real joy is the experience of being fully engaged in whatever I'm doing)
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To: gogeo

Your reply makes no sense....


276 posted on 01/15/2006 3:39:45 PM PST by Fawn (http://www.grab.com/fun/specials/licensetopill)
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To: arasina

Arasina. Thank you!

(I'm usually attracted to the ugly ones anyway. ;) LOL!)


277 posted on 01/15/2006 3:43:19 PM PST by phantomworker (Winning is important but the real joy is the experience of being fully engaged in whatever I'm doing)
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To: Shalom Israel
attracted to and in love with" is that it refers to physical attraction and romantic love. Both of which are temporary.

Why do you think they are temporary? True love can last a life time.

278 posted on 01/15/2006 3:45:20 PM PST by phantomworker (Winning is important but the real joy is the experience of being fully engaged in whatever I'm doing)
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To: Shalom Israel
..... it refers to physical attraction and romantic love. Both of which are temporary.

It's all temporary. People who stay married need a dependent friend.

279 posted on 01/15/2006 3:46:08 PM PST by Fawn (http://www.grab.com/fun/specials/licensetopill)
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To: Shalom Israel
Um, what does "attracted to" generally mean? Oh, that's right--physical attraction. And what about "in love with"?

I disagree that being attracted to someone refers only to physical attraction. I'm attracted to intelligence, sense of humor, compassion/understanding, shared tastes, etc. Those are lasting attributes and supercede 'romantic' love.

Also, as far as physical attraction: Whereas at twenty I would've been physically attracted to a guy, say, with lots of hair on his head...that certainly isn't the case some 30 years later, especially if he has the qualities to which I'm attracted. Unnuhstan? :o)

280 posted on 01/15/2006 3:48:35 PM PST by arasina (So there.)
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