Posted on 09/22/2005 5:48:16 PM PDT by wagglebee
Welcome to the old fashioned club.
I couldn't imagine making a promise, "in front of God" then breaking it on a stupid whim.
No, I get the point, I just think it's stupid.
Look, generally speaking, people have affairs for one reason: people like sex. Sex is fun, it's exciting, and it feels good. People like new things, and that hasn't changed since people have started walking this earth. People are programmed to procreate. We are programmed for sex.
The Internet hasn't made the fantasy easier; people had imaginations before the Internet. Before the Internet, if a man saw an attractive woman in a short skirt or whatever, he still had "illict fantasies." That's just the way it is. After all, even if you want to think that the Internet is "responsible," illicit sex doesn't just magically appear on your computer screen--you have to seek it out, and that idea has to come from somewhere--and that somewhere is the mind of the person who had that fantasy or thought before ever logging on.
Clinton legacy ping
I have a friend whose husband first got into internet porn. Then he met someone online in a porn site. Now, he's asked my friend for a divorce.
I think internet porn is very addictive, and it just makes it easier to find someone else who is also into the same thing.
My poor friend had to be tested for STDs, and she has 2 small kids. I feel very sorry for her.
Whoops, illicit, rather. You knew that.
The problem is what you say is that the success of failure of the marriage rests on good, pro marriage behavior by both parties. A partner could go into the marriage as you say, and then just really screw up at a later juncture.
Look at this scenario: a good guy can be very respectful and sincere with a woman who doesn't want to have sex right away. He is patient and suportive, and they build a good relationship, get married, and enjoy a good emotional and physical relationship after that.
A guy can swoop in and seduce the woman in a matter of a couple of hours. A floozie can swoop in and seduce the man in a matter of a few minutes. That's not to say the decision to cheat is excusable, but it does happen. What's left is what the two parties (not one or the other) decide to do.
Sometimes the cheated-upon spouse's hands are not clean, either. While not a cheater, they might have alienated their spouse in some way that helped them fall to temptation swifter.
My standard advice for dealing with a cheating galpal or spouse is to leave them. I have a very utility-based argument for that, too, if anyone wants to know.
Heh, heh. And I for one would pay good money to know who the other party was. Was it Beulah Bondi...or Marjorie Main? Go Jimmah go! Steal that kiss, you Don Juan, you! Pucker up, peanut boy!
If I was going to marry a rich guy, I'd have no problem signing a reasonable prenup. I would probably insist on it.
Haven't you ever heard of the Limbaugh Doctrine?????
Always!
Adulterers often don't approve of what they do, but they still do it.
Also, these stats often treat a brief dalliance (sometimes caught before it gets too physical) as an 'affair.' While they can say that 1/2 of men and 1/3 of women have had affairs, I bet a good number are situations like that, or one-time events that the party is regretful of. It's probably not accurate to say that those numbers of spouses are chronic cheaters.
That's not to say it's notably less damaging to a marriage. It is to throw some water on the idea that many many people are cheating most of the time.
Careful with that analogy-somebody might mention that flashlight that you pick up & shake back and forth a few times, and those batteries get charged up just fine;)
Same here!
Mine would read
"I keep the John Deere Riding Mower, all the animals, my colllection of copper pots AND my grannies chamber pot!"
Oh yeah, and my camel collection is off limits.
There wouldn't be adultery if women would quit playing games when it's time to do the nitty-gritty, complaining about "headaches" or that their favorite character died on the soap opera.
"Heh, heh. And I for one would pay good money to know who the other party was. Was it Beulah Bondi...or Marjorie Main? Go Jimmah go! Steal that kiss, you Don Juan, you! Pucker up, peanut boy!"
Jeez, what a great reply. I forgot Marjorie Main--Ma and Paw Kettle, I loved them. I hope Jimmy didn't have his eye on that cute little thing that kept coming after him...the killer wabbit.
The problem is that in most cases, the decision often seems like a really good idea at the time.
Hey guy, how do you know my wife????
{;o)
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