[Cableguy]

Another thing that Bush can make fun of

[najida]

OOHhhhHHHHh!!!!

Group hug everyone!

(but if you start singin' Kum Ba Yah, I'll hurt you.)

[Bottom_Gun]

in the words of the Church lady...."isn't that special?"

[hosepipe]

NEXT: Department of Happiness..circa "1984"..

[NRA1995]

Since 9-11 was supposedly caused by a lack of imagination, I propose the Dept Of Imagination....."Imagine there's no terrorists....it's easy if you try...."

[wisconsinconservative]

bookmark

[demkicker]

Got this in an email and know everyone will appreciate it:

AMERICANS WITH NO ABILITIES ACT PASSES CONGRESS

May 23, 2005

WASHINGTON, DC (AP) - Congress approved sweeping legislation, which provides new benefits for many Americans. The Americans With No Abilities Act (AWNAA), signed into law by President John Kerry shortly after its passage, is being hailed as a major victory by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any real skills or ambition.

"Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society," said Kerry, a longtime AWNAA supporter. "This is why many of them voted for me. We can no longer stand by and allow People of Inability to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they do a better job, or have some idea of what they are doing", said Kerry.

President Kerry has set an example, personally selecting hundreds of Nonabled people for top government positions, including many cabinet-level jobs. Under the Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million "middle man" positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusionary sense of purpose and performance.

Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given, to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations which maintain a significant level of Persons of Inability in top positions, and gives a tax credit to small and medium businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

Finally, the AWNAA contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the Nonabled, banning discriminatory interview questions such as "Do you have any goals for the future?" or "Do you have any skills or experience which relate to this job?" and "Are you awake?"

"As a Nonabled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them," said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, MI due to her lack of compliance with basic job skills.

"This new law should really help people like me." With the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other untalented citizens can finally see a light at the end of the tunnel. Said Kerry, "It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her adequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation."

[VOA]

Department of Wellness (Kerry wants to create it!)

Yeah, so that the tax dollars of us peons will help get his first (and maybe
still) wife help for her depression?

Heck, if I'd stood next to Kerry that would be enough to depress me.

[Mike Bates]

[YankeeReb]

When I saw the title of this thread I immediately thought of that old Monty Python skit about The Ministry of Silly Walks.