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A skydiving Santa looking to make a grand entrance while taking an Elf on the Shelf to a 9-year-old girl crashed into a tree and light pole before hitting a Florida beach and breaking his leg. News outlets say George Krokus was dressed as Santa Claus during a Saturday skydive to deliver toys to the Tampa Bay Beach Bums Operation Santa Charity Volleyball Tournament. Madison Spiers saw the crash and later found a note from the "elf" named Kristoff who visits her house during the holidays. It said, "As we were about to land this big tree jumped right out...

Christmas brings out the kid in all of us ... Santa Claus, presents, twinkling lights -- and the creepy Elf on the Shelf. Whose idea was it for there to be deranged-looking elves showing up and moving around your house? It would have been terrifying to me as a child! He's watching, always watching. Snip... 2. The Elf was caught smuggling spiked Hershey's Kisses over the Candy Land border.

Who's naughty? Who's nice? 1.This elf who's clearly had too much to drink.2.This elf who won't hesitate to murder some Barbie dolls.3.This elf who watched Silence of the Lambs one too many times.4.This elf who quit gift-making to become a ladies' man.5.This elf who's feeling a bit devious. 6.This elf who didn't think twice before he put his you know what in a box.7.This narcissistic elf.8.This elf who wants to make angels.9.This elf who has taken the game of tag too far.10.This elf who has an addiction problem.11.This elf who's enjoying his white privilege.12.This elf who likes a good office...

Oh sure, they look cute and innocent.Butt look closer, they may be government agents:Or possibly even double agents. You simply can’t trust them.They may all be working for the NSA for all we know. WASHINGTON — Internal documents from the National Security Agency show that its intelligence-gathering reached far deeper into Santa Claus’s annual toy-distribution operations than acknowledged. Sources close to the agency had previously confirmed that it has been provided with the contents of Mr. Claus’s database of naughty and nice children under a confidential data-sharing arrangement. But according to the documents, which were among those leaked by Edward Snowden,...

Apparently, Elf on the Shelf is evil... No, not that kind of evil (are "fun-loving" antics from inanimate dolls "evil"?) This kind of evil. Could there be something more sinister behind the little elf sitting on the shelf who returns to the North Pole each night?Yes, says Laura Pinto, a digital technology professor at the University of Ontario Institute of Technology.She recently published a paper titled “Who’s the Boss” on the doll, saying the idea of it reporting back to Santa each night on the child’s behavior “sets up children for dangerous, uncritical acceptance of power structures,” according toinsideHalton.com.From her...

Never waste an opportunity to ridicule a liberal meme :-) I have three others at the original post, but I wanted to keep this FR friendly :-)