Maybe Mr. Jackson just needs a nose prosthetic to change his image?
Posted on 07/07/2002 5:27:17 PM PDT by cd jones
MICHAEL JACKSON ACCUSES SONY MUSIC CHIEF OF STEALING HIS NOSE
Blames Failure of Most Recent Record on Lack of Nose
Once-popular pop singer Michael Jackson leveled new attacks at his record
label today, accusing Sony Music chief Tommy Mottola of stealing his nose.
Crisscrossing Manhattan with the Reverend Al Sharpton, Wacko Jacko singled
out Mr. Mottola as the author of a plot to purloin his precious facial
feature, which Lloyds of London has valued at well over $48 million.
"Tommy Mottola, give me my nose back, or your nose will burn in hell," Mr.
Jackson said to increasingly perplexed crowds.
Mr. Jackson blamed the worldwide failure of his last record, the
ironically titled "Invincible", on the fact that he wrote, produced, and
recorded the tracks without a nose.
While reluctant to comment on his allegations, record industry insiders
were surprised to see Mr. Jackson accompanied by Reverend Sharpton, an
African American, since Mr. Jackson's fan base is principally composed of
European and Japanese teenagers who are under the impression that Mr.
Jackson is still popular in the U.S.
For his part, Mr. Mottola released a tersely worded statement denying any
knowledge of the whereabouts of the erstwhile King of Pop's nose.
"It is my recollection that when Michael Jackson signed with Sony Music
his nose had already gone missing," the statement read.
The mystery of Mr. Jackson's missing nose may be near resolution, however,
as a source close to Winona Ryder revealed that the embattled actress is
about to acknowledge that she is in possession of the Grammy-winning
artist's nose.
"Winona didn't mean to steal Michael Jackson's nose," the source said.
"She thought she had paid for it when she put it in her handbag."
Firmly planted up Elizabeth Taylor's posterior.
Has this he/she flipped?? Please, have some warm milk and cookies and get some rest before you hurt yourself.
Maybe Mr. Jackson just needs a nose prosthetic to change his image?
"Everybody's got somethin to hide, 'cept for me and my monkey."
Michael Jackson and his best friend "Bubbles"
One exhibit in particular was noteworthy. It consisted of some solder that had been melted down and then tossed against the walls of a room, and left to melt into piles of slag on the floor. Seriously. That was right about when I decided that "Modern Art" is just a fancy word for landfill.
What did you do today? You are on a roll with these funny remarks..........LOL..........
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