Bovine badinage: David Limbaugh reveals screwball antics of animal-rights activists

WorldNetDaily.com ^ | Friday, May 24, 2002 | David Limbaugh

[JohnHuang2]

If the left hadn't exclusively reserved the term "extremist" for pro-life Christian conservatives, they'd understand that it more accurately describes any number of fringe groups they identify with, such as animal-rights activists.

When you read newspaper stories about recent outlandish activities by this "movement," you simply don't see the term "extremist." But no word could be more fitting … except maybe "screwball." Just consider the following items, and tell me with a straight face that in a saner era, these people wouldn't be considered full-fledged wackos.

• People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals and the American Civil Liberties Union have sued the District of Columbia Arts Commission for discrimination because it rejected a sculpture of a weeping and shackled baby elephant wearing a circus sign. They're mad because the commission accepted another circus elephant sculpture that didn't have the proper political slant. (The accepted sculpture showed a happy elephant, God forbid.) Jane Garrison, PETA's – get this – "elephant specialist," trumpeted, "Life is no party for animals forced to perform in circuses. If elephants' cries for justice can't be heard in Washington, maybe the elephant should no longer be used to symbolize democracy."

• The Rhode Island legislature is considering a bill that would forbid live performances or displays of lions, elephants, tigers and bears in that state. Lions, tigers and bears, oh my!

• Some lawyers believe that animals ought to be able to sue in their own right. Cass Sunstein, a University of Chicago law professor, favors the appointment of legal guardians for animals. "African-Americans and women and handicapped people and homosexuals – they're all able to talk," she said. "That made all the difference. If animals could speak, the law would look a lot different." I guess Ms. Sunstein is unfamiliar with Mr. Ed.

• Activists are urging the Eugene, Ore., city council to amend its city ordinances to recognize that people don't "own" animals, but are their "guardians." One psychology professor advocating the amendment says it will encourage people to change the way they think about animals – as beings instead of property. Yes, I suppose irate Republican animal guardians would be much less likely than Republican animal owners to kick their dogs when they got home from work. And that's a good thing.

• PETA is demanding that an Austin, Minn., high school stop using the nickname "Packers" (short for "meatpackers") because it is "offensive." The callous school remains defiant despite the hurt feelings of all animals whose family members have been executed at slaughterhouses.

• The German Bundestag voted to add "and animals" to a law that requires the government to respect and protect the dignity of human beings. The bill is mainly aimed at restricting the use of animals in scientific experiments. (Note: The vast left-wing conspiracy – as distinguished from its feeble and fictitious counterpart on the right – is an international affair.)

• The Animal Liberation Front in New Zealand contaminated shampoo bottles with ammonia and hydrogen peroxide and snuck them in supermarkets around the country to bring attention to their claim that Procter & Gamble mistreats animals during its product testing. ALF said the action was dedicated to Barry Horne, a British vivisectionist serving an 18-year jail sentence for a series of arson attacks, who died during a hunger strike in November. Oh, that's understandable then.

• PETA was outraged with a Connellsville, Pa., high school's plan to exploit a cow to raise money for its prom. In the scheme, the school lawn was marked off in thousands of squares and each of them was "sold" for $10. Then a cow was led onto the lawn to defecate on a square. The "owner" of the lucky square would win $10,000, and the balance would fund the prom. PETA's apparent objection was that the cow was not consulted in advance. One of its "cruelty caseworkers" mooed that PETA is opposed to any activity using animals for entertainment. "Specifically, it's very demeaning to the animal." After reading about this, I tried to reach the cow for comment, but its guardian thought that additional publicity would just further erode its self-esteem.

Spokesmen for the European Breast Conference said that women breast-cancer patients will suffer and die unnecessarily because of delays caused by animal-rights protesters. "Without animal research we wouldn't make many of our most important discoveries about breast cancer, but this wave of protest has cowed doctors and made everything more expensive," said Michael Baum, Emeritus Professor of Surgery at University College London.

I rest my case.

[JohnHuang2]

Friday, May 24, 2002

Quote of the Day by Arcturus

[TomB]

moooo.....

[pariah]

PETA's message: We respect equally all protoplasm. They don't elevate the status of animals, they lower the status of all human beings to mere 'stuff'. Dog, people, earthworms -- Gaia loves us all!

[Reaganesque]

I had a run in with these wackos. I worked at a hospital in La Jolla, CA and one day we had the Chairman of GM in to speak about seatbelt safety. GM does animal testing so PETA had a number of people who dressed up as doctors and nurses infiltrate the forum. As it was beginning, they all stood up and started shouting. Security was called and they were cleared from the room. However, a few minutes later they came back with a serious demand. They demanded validation for their parking stub.

[TrappedInLiberalHell]

While I believe in ethical treatment of animals, I don't believe in treating them like people. That demeans humans. I'm not a heartless bastard that thinks animals exist only to toil and slave for my benefit, like PETA seems to think. I love watching a hawk circle in the sky, without longing to blast it with my rifle. That doesn't mean I believe it ought to get a college education.

[Tennessee_Bob]

Ping!

[PogySailor]

How long before some PETA whack-o demands the right to vote for animals?  Of course, since they can't hold a pencil of read, they'd need to be "assisted" by an animal rights advocate. 
The democrats ought to look into this long neglected "constituency"!

[Motherhood IS a career]

"tell me with a straight face that in a saner era, these people wouldn't be considered full-fledged wackos. "

Yes. Imagine PETA making these propositions to the Pilgrims. Going on like this about the feelings of cows, and the opinions of elephants. They wouldn't have been laughed out of society, they would have been locked up in the looney bin. Or possibly burned at the stake.

[Motherhood IS a career]

"While I believe in ethical treatment of animals, I don't believe in treating them like people. That demeans humans. I'm not a heartless bastard that thinks animals exist only to toil and slave for my benefit, like PETA seems to think. I love watching a hawk circle in the sky, without longing to blast it with my rifle. That doesn't mean I believe it ought to get a college education."

Exactly.

[Motherhood IS a career]

"The Rhode Island legislature is considering a bill that would forbid live performances or displays of lions, elephants, tigers and bears "

What makes PETA think that animals don't like to perform in the circus? After all, if they have such well developed self-esteem, their egos would love the cheer of the crowd. Besides, I hear that it's a real cushy job.

[Maceman]

If animals could speak, the law would look a lot different.

If people could flap their arms and fly the law would look a lot different too.

[John O]

If elephants' cries for justice can't be heard in Washington, maybe the elephant should no longer be used to symbolize democracy."

First of all elephants don't represent democracy. They represent the Republican party. Secondly I didn't know that Dr. Doolittle was a PETA member, how else would they know that the elephant was crying for justice instead of for another bushel of fruit?

The Rhode Island legislature is considering a bill that would forbid live performances or displays of lions, elephants, tigers and bears in that state.

I think this was actually promoted by the Providence Zoo. "Administrator1: Well the budget is so tight that we have to get rid of some animals. Administrator2: Hey! lets make a law outlawing some of them and then we can blame it on the legislature! Administrator1: Great Idea. We can shift the blame and still have an excuse for having a cruddy zoo!"

Some lawyers believe that animals ought to be able to sue in their own right.

I was sued by my cow for unfair working hours but the case was dismissed when the cow got fined for contempt of court after dropping a load on the witness stand.

One psychology professor advocating the amendment says it will encourage people to change the way they think about animals – as beings instead of property.

I already think of them as beings. Beings that happen to be property

PETA is demanding that an Austin, Minn., high school stop using the nickname "Packers" (short for "meatpackers") because it is "offensive."

This is striking too close to home. The Green Bay Packers were original named for Meat Packers also. If PETA ticks off the Packer fans they'll really find out what cruelty to animals is. You don't mess with people who will go to Lambeau to watch football games shirtless in Wisconsin in January.

Barry Horne, who died during a hunger strike in November.

I've always had a question on hunger strikes. Why do we bother force feeding people on hunger strikes when we'd really rather have them dead anyway? I'd think "Chump don't want no help, Chump don't get no help"

PETA was outraged with a Connellsville, Pa., high school's plan to exploit a cow to raise money for its prom. In the scheme, the school lawn was marked off in thousands of squares and each of them was "sold" for $10. Then a cow was led onto the lawn to defecate on a square. The "owner" of the lucky square would win $10,000, and the balance would fund the prom. PETA's apparent objection was that the cow was not consulted in advance.

Bossie Bingo is played with religious ferver here in southern Indiana. You don't mess with it. Lets look at it from the cow's perspective - "I've got this whole big area to graze in with no competition and I get to poo on the schoolyard and get away with it" To me it seems to be a win-win situation. (Unfortunately I always loose at Bossie Bingo. I never can tell where the cow chips will fall)

Sorry for the long reply but PETA makes me crazy.

We had our company cookout yesterday, got to eat beef and chicken and pork. Leftovers today. People Eating Tasty Animals. And the old favorite, "If God didn't intend for us to eat animals, why are they made of meat?"

God Save America (Please)

[Byron_the_Aussie]

..the Animal Liberation Front in New Zealand contaminated shampoo bottles with ammonia and hydrogen peroxide and snuck them in supermarkets around the country...

Bump.

Your perverted ideology, now spreading through our erstwhile peaceful South Pacific isles.

[self_evident]

They demanded validation for their parking stub.

LOL! Please tell me that you laughed them out of the building

...and reprimanded them for driving those vile carbon dioxide producing machines.

[Sungirl]

Well....that is an outright crime...they can't be contaminating things like that.

I would like to know why they rejected the elephant sculpture when it was ok to put up a picture of Jesus with cow poop all over it.
And I don't like animals being used in circuses...and I do like the "guardian" name change (course I don't know all the fine print yet)....but making them rename the packers is ridiculous and so is getting upset over the cow dung game....

[Motherhood IS a career]

PETA was outraged with a Connellsville, Pa., high school's plan to exploit a cow to raise money for its prom. In the scheme, the school lawn was marked off in thousands of squares and each of them was "sold" for $10. Then a cow was led onto the lawn to defecate on a square. The "owner" of the lucky square would win $10,000, and the balance would fund the prom. PETA's apparent objection was that the cow was not consulted in advance.

So let me see if I understand correctly -- PETA claims that the cow gives a $hit?

[Reaganesque]

We didn't. But most of the reporters who were there did. The protest only rated a single mention in one of those "Believe It or Not" type columns in one of the smaller newspapers in Southern CA. It was very funny.

[NotJustAnotherPrettyFace]

PETA = People Eating Tasty Animals