ICYMI: The USDA Published a Guide to Roasting Marshmallows

Townhall.com ^ | May 19, 2015 | Christine Rousselle

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Pearls Before Swine is one of my favorite comic strips. While I normally read it for the daily laugh, today's strip did the immense public service of reminding me how silly our government can be:

[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

Nanny State DANG!

[Graybeard58]

My family just roasted some a few days ago, I hope we did it right. I burnt mine somewhat but that's the way I likes 'em.

[clearcarbon]

[Red_Devil 232]

I wonder if we can use wood logs or coals or gas to roast them over?

[Daffynition]

Have you seen these new mallows? An abomination...takes the *art* away from building a s'more.

[DemforBush]

I like them on the burnt side myself.

BTW, I’ve been told that peeps - those little marshmallow chicks and bunnies you see in Easter baskets - make GREAT roasted marshmallows. The sugar outside caramelizes and makes a sort of crunchy glaze on the ‘mallow.

[ConorMacNessa]

They sure as Hell didn't consult me! I'm not that crazy about roasted marshmallows - but my "baby" brother loved them. I was most adroit at perching them at the right distance from the fire and pulling them out at precisely the point where they were lightly toasted, not carbonized.

The skills I learned roasting marshmallows for my little Bro stood me in good stead when I had to step up to the Grill and prepare the sacred Family Steaks, Ribs, Burgers, Dogs, Sausages, Shrimp, Salmon and Lobster we grill.



Passing the Tradition on!

"I am an American fighting man. I serve in the forces which guard my country and our way of life.
I am prepared to give my life in their defense."

[5th MEB]

Looks like he’s holding dogkabob to me.

[PROCON]

Just damn, Navy Bro, I've been using a 1 foot spit to roast my marshmallows over a camp fire, burns me every time, many trips to the emergency room.

I'm so glad the gubmint came out with these guidelines so I'll know better next time.</sigh>

[ConorMacNessa]

I have to confess I've lost a few to the fire over my years. Of course, at Castle MacNessa, the fire is an unbounded force of Nature to be reckoned with and subdued.

The correct number of coals must be laid.
They must be laid in a perfect pyramid of five tiers amounting to 91 coals.
The "K' on the face of each coal must be aligned to be upright from the front of the Grill. If you're not using Kingsford coals, you're a Heretic, doomed, and need read no further.
The coals must be allowed to flame for at least 45 minutes before you introduce the meat - you must cook the meat when the sacred fire has peaked. It will endure and serve you well in its elegant denoument.

So Say I.

"I am an American fighting man. I serve in the forces which guard my country and our way of life.
I am prepared to give my life in their defense."

[PROCON]

You are quite the charcoal connoisseur, sorry to tell you I use propane. OK, I'll repent :-)

[ansel12]

I’ve always wanted to try one, now I will have the confidence to give it a go.

I read the directions through and through, but I will print off a copy so that I will have them with me the next time that I go camping.

This is so exciting, the directions are written so clearly, that it almost seems as though a child could do it.

[ansel12]

I think someone photo-shopped a child doing it, just to embarrass we older guys by making it look easy.

[ConorMacNessa]

Army Bro, you need to come East and I will tutor you in these things. :)

It is sacred knowledge I learned from my Fathers, accumulated over many centuries.

"I am an American fighting man. I serve in the forces which guard my country and our way of life.
I am prepared to give my life in their defense."

[antidisestablishment]

Everyone knows that roasted marshmallows were the inspiration for Napalm. ;)

[maine-iac7]

behind the curve

CHOCOLATE IS GOOD FOR YOU - (real chocolate)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6BFYvaPfVw

[lowbridge]

Fire, a stick, and a marshmallow.

Now what am I supposed to do with those 3 things? I know! I’ll check with the federal government! They have all the answers!

[MeshugeMikey]

there is no activity in which man engages that these dweebs will not try to “control”

[Alamo-Girl]

Thanks for the ping!