I think your perceptions are valid. You have a finger on the pulse of the country.
The problem is that a true cross-section of America does not show up at the polls. Rather it is a hard sell GOTV by Dems, bribe their constituent groups (Blacks, Gays, Union, welfare recipients, Atheists, poor, 47% crowd, etc.), while the Republican vote is suppressed and depressed by the nomination of milquetoast candidates whom Conservatives cannot stand to hold their noes and vote for.
Our candidates are chosen by the GOPe, corrupt media, and rigged open primary systems which allow clowns like McCain to slip through and supposedly represent us.
I agree with you but in fairness two things need to be added.
0bama won because of outright fraud and purposely forced suppression by the government stopping various Tea Party efforts to organize and influence.
The Democrats used voter registration and absentee voting to gin up the vote, often illegally. They also bused in voters ineligible to vote.
Using the IRS, FEC and other agencies to investigate and threats of further federal prosecution, Tea Party groups could not exercise their constitutional rights. We can also add the media/press willingly supporting 0bama while piling on both Romney and conservatives in general, and it is further proof the media/press can sway an election.
Conservatives are just as capable as anyone else to operate the levers of the political machinery, but they don't.
Those "independent conservative" chauvinists who get all huffy, do not participate in the process and therefore have no levers to operate.
There shouldn't be such a thing as an "open primary" in any state.