Posted on 05/18/2008 6:54:58 PM PDT by ButThreeLeftsDo
The mother of a 13-year-old autistic boy who was banned by a court order from attending services at a Roman Catholic church in Bertha, Minn., woke up Sunday determined to take her son to mass.
But Carol Race changed her mind when Todd County Sheriff Pete Mikkelson met her at the end of her driveway Sunday and told her she would be arrested if she brought her son, Adam, into the Church of St. Joseph.
Instead, Race took Adam and her four other children to mass at Christ the King Church in nearby Browerville, Minn. "It occurred to me that if I step foot in [St. Joseph], they will arrest me and I won't end up going to mass anyway," she said.
She is scheduled to appear in court today over a citation she received last week for violating the restraining order by taking Adam to church on Mother's Day.
The dispute has drawn attention to what Race and advocates for the disabled say is a lack of education and understanding about autism. Race said that even though her son, who is home-schooled, sometimes acts up in church, the experience benefits him.
"He has a sense of the routine," she said. "That's one of the beautiful things about the Catholic mass for autistic individuals, its routine."
(Excerpt) Read more at startribune.com ...
You are making a lot of speculations here, and I have seen very tiny whips of young ladies bring children such as you described into line with no difficulty, so it certainly can be done.
This family sat in the back of church and left before mass was over. It appears as though the family had been trying to make it work also.
It makes little difference whether or not he understands the mass, his presence there is what God wants — at least that is what I have always been taught.
There are no perfect strangers in a Catholic Church — they are supposed to be a community of parishioners who reach out to each other.
Supposed to be, not exactly in this Church though.
We have an Autistic young man that attends our services, he sometimes acts out a bit... but he is a loved and accepted member of our church community.
We have a young man and a young lady, as well.
Granted, neither of them is 6 foot and 200 lbs plus.
I guess that is the real problem in this particular case....
“For a Catholic Church to place a restraining order against a child who has autism is not anything I will ever understand or condone.”
I would imagine that wasn’t their first choice of things to do. It does look like however the mother was determined to force her “child” on a congregation ill equipped to deal with such a problem. At 6 foot and 200 something pounds, he’s a danger to them and to himself.
No speculations, I was reading the article. This behemoth is a threat to the personal safety of the parishioners. You want to sit next to him when he decides to rock and roll, you go right ahead. Don’t ask others to do the same.
I have a great deal of sympathy for the family, but they live in a larger church community. If the child is this far out of control and they need to restrain him, they should understand. It is sad, but these things happen. The church offered compromise and the family refused. Perhaps it is God telling them to provide a safe environment for the child as well as their church. Some people do not listen.
I certainly hope the church and family can still resolve this.
It’s ok with you then, that granny gets knocked down as she’s standing in the aisle to exit church? Where do her rights start?
I think if I had a toddler, I’d be leary of taking him into a cry room where a 225 lb teen might get out of control.
Even children with disabilities has to have discipline though. If he is violent at church he can be violent elsewhere. Mom has a big problem.
I attended my church since 1974. It was hard for me too, but imo, the other parishioner’s rights to be able to hear and pay attention to the service overrode my son’s right to be there when he was disruptive. I wasn’t resentful in the least, although I didn’t let it escalate to a point where the church had to request that I not bring him. I recognized way before that that this was just not a place he should be at that time. He simply wasn’t capable of sitting quietly for an hour and it was unfair to expect it of him and frustrating for me until I recognized his limitations at that time. I wasn’t one of those parents who insisted their darling had the ‘right’ to be anywhere anyone else was, no matter what it did to other people.
I don’t understand significant challenges? HA! You have no clue. I have the utmost compassion for the family and their child. I also have compassion for the other parishioners. I doubt this decision was made lightly or just because they thought he got a little loud from time to time. There are safety issues here.
I was remembering a few years ago out in a rural area of my state there was this young man, obviously developmentally disabled, and the parents could not control him. He was a very large individual (much like this 13-year old, and just imagine how much LARGER this kid will be full-grown !).
Apparently the cops knew about this guy and they had to come out on occasion when he would lose control (and I believe it was usually the neighbors that would have to call when he’d be out acting menacing in their neighborhood). One night, he totally lost control, and the cops were called out again. The policeman on the scene had to take him down, and the young man was killed as a result of having to be subdued. You can guess whom the parents blamed, acting as though he was just a gentle little giant that couldn’t harm a fly.
When you have gigantic individuals that have little more than the sense of a charging Rhino, what other alternatives are there ? They could injure or kill somebody else all because the victim had the misfortune of being nearby when the guy has an episode.
When he was younger I of course wanted him exposed to Catholicism BUT his behavior was off the charts. He would get loud, run around and finally would leave church. I remember a time after he left mass that he walked down the middle of the street and I was at my wit's end.
He is older now and have receiving intervention from outside sources his behavior is controllable and he regularly attends mass. In fact, for his 17th birthday he asked for a cell phone and we complied.
If the boy in this article is urinating in church his parents need to find another route for him to get spiritual exposure. And another thing what are they doing to learn how to deal with his behavior?
He probably cannot take Communion. My grandson is not qualified to take Communion because he doesn't understand the concept and his church has no way to teach the First Communion and Penance sacraments to a profoundly autistic child. He does attend a school for autistic children run by Catholic nuns, and they will teach him when he is ready. He's 14 now, and still not ready. His mom sits near the rear of the church and takes him out when he becomes disruptive. So far that works.
When I attended his younger brother's first Communion last lyear you could hear him in the back of the church. Now that his voice has changed, people turn and stare when he speaks out. At least he doesn't spit, and his mom would have him in diapers if lhe were incontinent. He wore diapers until lhe was about 8, so I know what that is all about with an autistic child.
Pray for all autistic children and especially their families. It is a very difficult situation.
In your opinion. However he is the shepherd to an entire flock. Is there any limit on who you think a parish should endure so that someone can attend?
susie
He is urinating in church and spitting on people. Do you want your child or your grandmother sitting next to him?
susie
Well, that does confirm that he is Catholic. :) LOLOLOLOL!
Many years ago, I was loading my infant son into the rear seat of my 2 door sedan after Mass at St. Mary's in Walnut Creek, CA. We used basket beds in those days that hung over the back of the front seat with brackets. It was awkward to place the baby into the basket -- especially with another toddler hanging on to my skirt -- and required me to kneel halfway into the car, leaving the door wide open while I placed the baby carefully in his bed.
The baby was still 6 inches above the surface of the bed, when another car (anxious to get out of the parking lot) sideswiped my open car door, causing me to drop the baby as my car lurched forward and knocking me to the ground. I skinned my knee and tore my stocking.
My husband was furious and shouted at the driver to go ahead as soon as he saw that we were all right. Then I scrambled into the car and found that I could not close my door -- the accident had damaged the hinges.
So my husband decided to follow the other driver (who never looked back) so that I could write down the license number. The other driver (who was a teenager, accompanied by his family) took off at high speed in the Walnut Creek hills, totally ignoring the car chasing him with the passenger side door not quite closed.
We did get the license number and the State provided us with the name of the owner of the other car, but my husband managed to repair our door before we were able to make contact with them -- even though it took the rest of Sunday to do it.
We moved out of that parish 2 weeks later, but your comment brought back vivd memories about Catholics wanting to get out of Mass fast!
Having raised 3 boys (who were close in age) and attending Catholic church nearly every Sunday and Holy day as they were growing up, yeah, I know what it’s like. There were times when one of them had to be taken out. I never thought it right to subject my children’s misbehavior on the rest of the world, whether it was at church, a movie or a restaurant. Of course, an austistic child is a whole other matter (I’ve had a few in class, altho never one like the boy in the story). And I understand that and sympathize with the parents.
But, the fact remains. More and more Americans believe the world revolves around them and the rest of the world is less important than they. THAT does not seem to be a tenent of Christianity that I have seen in the Bible.
susie
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